Today I was accused of robbing a homeless man.

... I can't make this up. I got home, saw two missed calls from work, and when I inquired today about why, I was told a homeless man brought two cops to my job saying that one of the employees robbed him.

.... What?

 

Wow, SJ, can you sink any lower? loljk

A homeless man once shouted at me because he believed that I was laughing at him, but I hadbarely glanced at him as I walked by. That was pretty awful; "YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY, HUH? COME BACK HERE AND SEE HOW FUNNY IT IS." This happened during my weekend in NYC a few years ago.

 

You didn't get in any trouble with your job or the law, did you? You shouldn't have.

 

I can't say people have thought I have robbed a homeless man, but living in such a big suburban area we have so many around here. One day during the winter I was walking home with a nice cup of hot chocolate and decided I would walk home on the seawall. Our seawall is big, so you have to run and jump to get on top of it. So I put my hot chocolate up there first and then ran and jumped.

When I got up there, apparently a homeless man was seeking refuge in one of the little pockets that are blocked by two pieces of the wall. He jumped up holding this really large stick and screaming. And I freaked the hell out and yelled, "TAKE ANYTHING FROM ME JUST DON'T KILL ME."


...that son of a bitch took my hot chocolate...

 

Two months ago I was downtown running some errands and stuff and I stopped at this tiny little Subway on the corner before heading home and while I was there some homeless guy was standing on the corner of the street shouting at something on the other side, and at some point he took out a kitchen knife and started waving it around and stuff. Needless I bailed pretty quickly. My assumption was that he had literally lost his mind because nothing was on the other side of the street for him to be shouting and waving knives at.

 

What a strong man.

 

I remember my last interaction with a homeless person. He was an old black guy and I taught him to play Abalone. He enjoyed it and said, very enthusiastically, that it was a game. Then I bought him breakfast at Subway.

Classic Llave.

Classic Amaury.

 

My area doesn't have a ton of homeless people, due to being pretty rural, but I tend to just avoid them.

 

Most homeless people I encounter are because they call my dad's church and we put them up in a hotel, and sometimes buy them dinner. Or we drive them to the city so they can catch the bus from there.