The Misadventures in The Castle That Never Was

Hey guys! This is another fanfic I'm working on! :D

This has some stuff against the KH storyline, like Roxas knows Namine, everyone is alive, ect.

Well here it is!

Prolouge

The Organization had moved into a new headquarters: The Castle That Never Was. Their base Castle Oblivion was getting too small. The mebers, however, had rooms just the same, but bigger. Roxas had all his Bullet For My Valentine posters on the wall. Larxene had a huge plasma screen T.V, running by her electricity to save money. Marluxia had a big tree in the center of his room. Luxord slept on a poker table shaped bed. Demyx had his PS2 hooked up, playing Guitar Hero: Special Sitar Edition only for the past two months. Axel had fire graphics on his wallpaper. Saix had a huge window so that he could look at the moon clearly. Zexion had his Metallica signed guitar on the wall. Lexaeus had an arcade game called 'Tomahawk-Man', a rip-off of some other video game about a yellow dude. Vexen had a huge poster of 'How To Disect a Nobody'. Xaldin had a bicycle signed by LANCE Armstrong, he didn't like bikes, just the dude's name. Xigbar had Surfing magazines all over the floor, and the ceiling. Finally, Xemnas had a largte number one foam finger in the corner of his room. They had all lived good lives so far........but they had been only living there for two days.

Chapter 1-Roxas and Namine's First Date

"Awwww!" Xemnas sighed, mocking Roxas. He was going on his first date with Namine, and naturally everyone was making fun of him. Who wouldn't if you were wearing a green tuxedo with a sky blue tie to go with it."Our little Roxas is all grown up!" Everyone laughed as Roxas headed for the door.

Roxas started to tear up."Shut the heck up!" He slammed the door and ran down the blue light path that connected them to the City That Never Was. He went past Memory's Skyscraper, thhrough the Alley to Betwixt, up the Twilight Mansion Library secret passage stairs, and towards the White Room.

Roxas was sweating.....big time. He saw dark, wet places on his thick tux. Get it together, Roxas told himself, it's just a really hot blonde chick you like. The door opened and there stood Namine. She was dressed in her usual white gown. Her eyes were sparkling like the dew on the morning grass, her skin as beautiful and as perfect as a swan. How can you get it together, Roxas still thinking to himself, she's sexier than usual!

"Hi, Roxie-poo!" Namine smiled and hugged Roxas. He felt the air come out of his olungs, but for some reason he liked it."You ready for tonight? What are we doing first?" She let go so Roxas could check his to do list. He scanned it and looked for what he thought would be good to start with. He finally came up with....

"Fajita's!" Roxas exclaimed. Fajita's is a mexican restraunt he and Namine loved. They went there on unofficial dates. This was their first official date, but Namine didn't mind eating at a normal restraunt.

Namine smiled and took Roxas by the arm."What are we waiting for?" She said kidding."Let's go!"

* * * * * * *

When they reached the restraunt, Roxas noticed a sudden flash behind a bush. He looked closely at it and saw a blonde hair hanging out from the side."What's up, Roxie?" Namine asked cutely.

He looked back at the bush to see the hair gone."Nothing." He replied."Let's go get some quesidillas!" Roxas and Namine bolted inside, sat at their booth, and ordered. Roxas had a chicken quesidilla with cheese and rice, a Dr. Pepper on the side. Namine boasted a healthy fajita salad, sided with a glass of water. After dinner, they went skateboarding. Roxas showed Namine the best places to grind. Namine was actually as good as Roxas at skateboarding. She could kickflip, ollie, shuv-it, pop shuv-it, and dark slide. After that, Roxas bought them each sea salt ice cream bars. Roxas swore that the cashier had a little stubble where his sideburns use to be and a purple object behind his back.

The couple sat on the top of the Twilight Town Station tower, licking their ice cream before it melted. Namine pointed out some on Roxas' chin. She leaned in and licked it off. Roxas' cheeks were a burning red color. The position Namine was in made him want to push his lips against her's. He put a hand under her chin, lifted it up, and pressed on towards her....

"Um, Roxas..." Namine giggled."You kissed my nose." Roxas opened his eyes to reveal that he was indeed kissing Namine's nose."Let me help you..." She put her arms around him and started to position her lips and close her eyes....

ZAP! Roxas felt a large surge of electricity go through his body. Namine felt it also."Yeow!!!" They shouted in unison. A gust of wind then pushed them off the edge. Namine was freaking out and grabbed Roxas. He glided down as slowly as he could, landing softly on the pavement. Above, Roxas could hear the laughing of two familiar voices....

"Xaldin! Larxene! You'll pay for this!" Roxas shouted, raising a fist in the air towards them. Roxas looked at his watch and noticed it was time for him to take Namine home, fearing DiZ would kill him for having his memory witch late.

* * * * * * *

Roxas was at the door to the White Room, saying goodbye to Namine."You want to go get some new trucks for our boards tommorrow?" Roxas asked his love. He wanted her to say yes so bad. Every time he was with her, his heart rocketed skyward. He lost focus, smell, touch, and sometimes his pants.

"That sounds good." Namine replied, running a finger down his tie."However, you have got to give me one thing..."

Roxas sighed in delight."Anything..."

"How about a kiss good night?" Namine smiled. She leaned in and rapped her arms around him again. Namine gave Roxas the best kiss a nobody had ever had. He heard angels singing, bells ringing, and....

Your tears don't fall, Roxas' phone played, they crash around me. He digged for it in his pocket, opened it, and talked."Hello?"

"Roxas!" It was a distressed Demyx."Axel got his head stuck in the toilet!"

Roxas sighed."I'm kind of saying bye to my girl, Demyx..."

"Hurry!" Demyx shouted."Only the keyblade master himself can get a pyromainiac out of a toilet!"

"Why is that?" Roxas asked with an aggrivated tone. Namine giggled, hearing everything.

"IDK!" Demyx shouted."Just hurry!"

Roxas shut the phone and sighed."Bye, Namine."

"Bye, Roxie." She gave him a kiss that lasted a full two minutes, then he ran off.

Dang, she knows how to kiss, Roxas told himself.

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Tell me what you guys think.

 

ok,that is awesome,nice story,keep'em coming!

 

HAHAHAHA THIS IS GREAT!

Omg i love this badly! Everything was like super perfect and funny xD
i liked how you described each members room so it suited them. And I'm glad you still have BFMV as Roxas' fave band lmao
But seriously, his ringtone shouldnt be tears dont fall.. thats a break up song O.o

lol very OOC for namine but its all cool.

Axel with his head in a toilet X_X

carry it on!

 

this is great and funny as hell.
keep it up Roxas24Sora

 

thanx dude! same for your's

Oh yea....sorry Obsessed...you oughta teach that dude a lesson :(
thanx! I was thinking of putting a Three Days Grace guitar in his room, but everyone says that they are his favorite in AMVs and theme song things on YouTube, so I thought, being different isn't bad!
btw, what does OOC stand for?

thanks dude!
next update will be either tonight or tommorow

 

It stands for 'Out Of Character', which she really is, as well as Xemnas and Xaldin. Namine is WAY too shy to call Roxas 'Roxie-poo', even though it is hilarious XD.

And Xemnas and Xaldin are too serious to act like that, not critisizing your work, but it's not really how they act.

Larxene, Demyx and somewhat Axel on the other hand hit the mark.

Really this is funny, keep up the good work!!!

 

What, your saying that the normal Axel would get his head stuck in a toilet? :roll:

yeah your right about Namine though... but its good to experiment with characters and make them slightly different than usual.

I want the next update! *does puppy dog eyes*

 

Chapter 2

yea I know they're out of character :D
I said at the beggining this might not be the same, but thanx!

God, I can't resist puppy dog eyes...

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Roxas had just arrived when the others got Axel out. Roxas was looking at Axel in confusion."Why the heck would you put your head in the toilet?" He asked.

Axel looked gravely into Roxas' eyes."It all started with a mouse..."

"Axel!" Roxas knew Axel couldn't resist burning a small rodent."First of all, I didn't ask for a quote by Walt Disney. Second, how did the mouse make you fall in?"

"Well..." Axel started."SOMEBODY..." He pointed at Lexeaus. The Silent Hero looked at everybody, smiling nervously."...left the bar of soap on the floor after taking his shower. I slipped on it while chasing the little booger."

Everyone looked at Axel as if he had lost it. Suddenly, a mouse scurried across the floor. Larxene screamed and jumped into Saix's hands. The mouse was looking at Larxene, tilting its head to the side."Kill it!" Larxene screamed."Kill it!"

Axel summoned his chakrams and laughed manically."Burn, baby!" He shouted. A flame erupted beside the mouse. It squeked and ran through Saix's legs. He dropped Larxene and ran after the mouse with Axel."I'll take the front, you take the rear." Axel shouted to Saix.

A few minutes later, they got the mouse cornered and burned it alive. Larxene ran up to see what happened. She punched Saix with all her might."You dropped me!" She was engulfed in electricity now.

"Well, Saix..." Axel patted his shoulder."You're screwed!"

Saix ran off, an angry Larxene chasing him.

* * * * * * *

The next morning, Axel headed to Roxas' room to play some Halo 3. When he entered, he found Roxas was still asleep. He went over to the bed, realizing that Roxas was talking in his sleep."What's up, Namine..." Roxas muttered. Axel tried his best to keep back his laughter."...what do you want?...." Roxas smiled in suprise."....Oh, you bad girl!"

Axel was on the floor laughing his brains out. He realized Roxas had changed his dream when he started to sing...

"And every time we touch.....I get this feeling..." Axel was now crying from his laughter. Suddenly, he bolted up, thinking of a brilliant prank. He went to Larxene's room, got a bra, a blonde wig, and pair of pannies, and ran back.

He carefully put the bra, pannies, and wig on Roxas."Perfect!" He whispered. Axel then started breathing hard for a dramatic touch."Roxas! Where are you?" Axel screamed.

Roxas woke with a start, noticing his hair had grown a few inches."What's this?!" He shouted in confusion.

Axel looked up and down."Why are you Namine?" Roxas' face went from confused to terrified when he realized that he did look like Namine in the mirror.

"You guys must have switched bodys or..." He managed a smile and started to run."...somebody pranked you!"

Roxas threw the wig off and ran after Axel. They passed the other members. Xemnas looked at everyone.
"Why is Number Thirteen chasing Number Eight in women's underwear?"

"Axel stole my underwear and put it on Roxas." Larxene said with a grin. When she finally realized what Axel did, she bellowed, "O...M...G...Axel! You are soooo dead!" She then ran after the other two.

Luxord sipped his coffee."At least this morning is peaceful." He stated sarcastically.

Then, out of the blue, Demyx shouted, "Oh yea! I beat 'Through the Fire and the Flames' on expert last night!" Everyone ignored him and went to the living room."Typical." He sighed.

 

i don't know how you came up with this but it's great.
this is probly the first fan fic that makes me laugh every time.
keep this up and you will be a great writer

 

Ha! That was great, once again. I laughed my head off when you had Larxene jumping into Saix's arms.. like Saix would ever agree to that lol :roll:

The pranking Roxas thing was a tad weird.. Its not as if Roxas and Namine have the same face, body etc. Still good though.

Yeah go Demyx. Through the Fire and Flames is ridiculously hard. Dragonforce ftw! (Im a dragonforce fan lol). I don't really like TTFAF much though.

 

TTFAF? what's that?

 

Through the fire and flames lol

to be honest i prefer other dragonforce stuff thats what i meant..

 

to be honest i don't even know what dragonforce is

 

To put it simply its a band that plays very fast metal music.
The game guitar hero 3 put them in the spotlight with their most famous song, through the fire and flames (the hardest song in the game) but fans will have known them before this time(aka me lol)

The lyrics in their songs often have a very mythological theme. The band , however are seen as a studio band, not very sucessful live.

I recommend the song my spirit will go on.

Oh and Herman Li (lead guitar) is a total pr*t.

 

lol i that it was a game or someting like that but it's a band
sorry for those how like dragonforce

 

It's cool, no offense taken! :D
Sweet! Page two in four days! Thanks guys!

 

When are you going to update?
I could really use some of your humour right now lol

coz the last chapter made me do this :roll:

 

That was funny ;)
*Waiting for next chapter*

 

Chapter 3

Hey guys! I'm back! This weekend was my birthday, so we went to the beach. Therer was no internet access, so no KH-Vids.:( On the plus side, I got a PSP with Crisis Core and Sonic Rivals!:D

Well, here's Chapter 3!

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A week after the Roxas Dress Up incident, Xemnas held a Organization meeting in the Room Where Nothing Gathers. Namine and Roxas planned a date a few days before Xemnas announced the meeting, so Namine got to sit with Roxas to make up for the date. Everyone sat in their seats (Namine sat in a seat beside Roxas that magically appeared from the ground). Everyone had a cup with their name on it, filled with their favorite beverage. Even Namine got a cup filled to the top with Green Tea.

Xemnas cleared his throat."My organization, it has come upon me to conjure up rules for this castle. First of all..." Xemnas was cut off by a small sound. Everyone looked around to see what it was. The source was Roxas turning his MP3 on during Xemnas' lecture. Everyone also noticed Namine laying on Roxas, making out with him and giggling."Number Thirteen, do you have the nerve to cut off your Superior by having a romantic session with the witch?"

Roxas pulled out one of his earphones and gave Xemnas the evil stare.'Oh! I'm sorry!" Roxas said in a sarcastic manner. Namine was unzipping his cloak, kissing the skin underneath. Roxas continued."But SOMEBODY knew I had plans for a date and scheduled a meeting on the date...uh...date! So, I think that me having to...oh! Namine, not now! I said later in my room." Namine had gone a little bit too far unzipping Roxas' cloak. Taking heed to what she did, she zipped it back up and got back in her seat, blushing.

"Oh, gosh!" Axel bursted into laughter."Roxas is gonna get it on with Namine! Got it memorized?!" Everybody was now laughing, except for Roxas, Namine, Xemnas, Saix, and Xaldin. Namine was crying, Roxas was trying to sooth her, Xemnas was trying his best to calm everyone down, Saix was reading a poem about the moon, and Xaldin was making a new lance.

"HEY!" Zexion shouted loudly. Everyone turned to him and watched in awe as Zexion...

"You peed in your cloak?!" Axel couldn't hold it in."OMG! Who would think an emo pees on himself!"
While Axel laughed, Zexion blushed and hurried to the bathroom. Now everyone was doing something different. Xemnas gave up on calming down the group and just played a game of FF Crystal Chronicles on his DS, Xigbar sang a line from a Bon Jovi song, Xaldin continued on his lance, Vexen joined Axel, Marluxia, Larxene, Lexaues, and Demyx in playing Sitar Hero: On Tour, Saix read aloud the moon poem, and Roxas continued in a make out session with Namine.

"One outburst about emos and the whole meeting is lost in time..." Xemnas whispered to Xaldin.

"I'm not emo!" Zexion shouted from the bathroom.

* * * * * * * *

A few days after the meeting, Demyx was walking through the castle to see what everybody was doing. He went by Roxas' room and heard some wierd noises. He put his ear to the side of the door and heard Namine panting. Then he heard her talking."Oh, Gosh! I'm tired! Let's keep going though..."

Demyx gasped and kicked the door open."You two will never get away with it!" He shouted.

Demyx was then confused when he realized Namine was playing Dance Dance Revolution with Roxas. The couple looked at him in confusion. Demyx backed out of the door slowly and went down the hall, shutting the door behind him.

"Oh my gosh!" Roxas zipped down his jacket."I thought he found out!"

Roxas looked in excitement as Namine took off her dress, leaving her in underwear."What are you waiting for..." She said seductively. She was then pounced on by Roxas, who went for her bra straps...

* * * * * * * *

Demyx went by Axel's room to realize Axel and Larxene playing Dance Dance Revolution also. He left and heard banging noises in the room. I don't want to know, Demyx thought to himself. He went by Zexion's room, Lexaeus' room, Vexen's room, and Saix's room and found them empty. Marluxia was out in the secret hidden greenhouse room, planting some daisies. Luxord was playing chess by himself. Demyx asked if he could play, but Luxord didn't hear him. He went by Xigbar's room and Xaldin's room to find them empty. Lastly, he went to the Superior's room, finding Xemnas with a female occupant...

"Aerith?! You hired Aerith to strip for you or something?!" Aerith and Xemnas turned to see Demyx in complete shock. They shrugged, turned back around, and started kissing. Demyx rushed towards Xemnas, took him by the arm, and pulled him towards the door, Aerith still on Xemnas.

"Number Nine!" Xemnas exclaimed."What is the meaning of this?"

Demyx turned around to realize Aerith lifting up her dress, Xemnas still under her."Hey! Not the right place!" Demyx shouted, pushing Aerith's dress down."You are sooo screwed if Zack or Cloud catch you with Aerith!"

BOOM!

"Uh-oh!" Demyx gasped. The boom was heard through the whole castle.

Then a loud, familiar roar was heard from downstairs. This roar was not an animal roar, however, but a human roar...

"Where's Aerith?!" Cloud shouted.

"You're officially screwed." Demyx and Aerith said in unison to Xemnas

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Watch'a guys think?

 

good chapter and Xemnas is officially dead meat in the next chapter.