Ah...I may be making a fan fiction of Terraria, and be posting it here...But I'm so self-conscious about my own workeven though I once won a school writing contest thing... If you don't know what Terraria is, you can either read about it Here And I may create an introduction to get it started...But, not too positive. Can anyone give me any tips and/or comments before I get started? Thanks! I don't really use word processors, but my internet is all "LOL YOU MISSPELLED THAT *Red squiggly line*". I don't usually make spelling mistakes or grammatical errors, and I haven't really posted anything yet... I also don't enjoy double spacing and such, but, I may start doing it. I made a bit of an "Intro" to it, and I came up with a bit of a story for it, which I shall reveal if I continue with this. I really honestly believe it could be alot better, but, if anybody else likes it, I'm good. Spoiler: Sucky Intro "Hey, wake up. We've got a big day ahead of us, Mutra, Korio." a slightly musculared man dropped two axes made out of wood on top of each other, glaring at the sleeping teens in front of him, lying on the grass filled ground in front of him. "Gaaah...Ten more minutes, Kruia..." the boy with tuffled mid-length black hair stirred, on the verge of waking and sleeping. "I'm not your mother. I'm not giving you, 'nor Mutra any special treatment because you're a couple 'a kids. So you'd better take these axes, and get choppin'" the man, Kruia, tapped the end of a pickaxe he had in hand against a tree that was shading them all. "We've gotta survive out here." "Right..." the other roused from his deep sleep, his shoulder length jet black hair nearly standing on end from his moving in his sleep. "I'll get on it, Kruia." he muttered, grasping one of the axes in hand, heaving it over his shoulder, while lightly kicking the dazed Korio in the side. The three-man group was nothing special. The leader, Kruia; a tall, muscular man, his light brown hair spiking in different directions from their time in the wilderness, and his two...Erm...Partners. Mutra and Korio were simply two teens dragged into this from the upcoming "End of the World" that had sprouted in the luscious world of Terraria. Korio stepped up awkwardly, going along with Mutra, hacking at the tree that Kruia had motioned to. "The two of you know we can't waste any time. Get a move on, nightfall will be here in about..." Kruia paused his sentence, staring at the sky, occasionally glancing at the sun every few seconds, "Around twelve hours. And I'm sure that neither of you want to go through what we did last night..." he motioned to the boys' light grey shirts, and light blue pants, which seemed to be clawed at, revealing the cut skin underneath. "R-...Right!" Korio muttered, beginning to pick up his pace on chipping slowly at the tree along with Mutra. Once the tree was felled, the boys turned to their leader, a look of triumph. "Well?" Mutra asked, expecting praise, or some sort of comment from their leader. "Good. Nice form with your swings an' all, but you may wanna work on yo-" his eyes widened in what appeared to be a mix of shock and fear... "Mutra. Korio. Gather all the wood you can." his face stricken with an unseen horror, before he grimaced at the boys, "Now." he growled, swinging his pick across his shoulder, beginning to jog opposite from Mutra and Korio. "What do you think that could've been about..." Mutra grumbled, dropping his axe, a bit stubborn to leave their current set-up. "Do you think he's messing with us? He's still running." Korio glanced over his shoulder, seeing nothing out of the ordinary, other than an upcoming darkness, "It seems like it's going to rain in a bit...But..." stopping himself a bit abruptly, falling back on the ground in a lazy flop, as Mutra sat, with his legs outstretched. "WHAT DO YOU TWO THINK YOU'RE DOING?", the gruff, and, quite irritated voice spread throughout the flat land, Mutra and Korio looked up in bewilderment, noticing Kruia standing a good bit away from the two, fuming at the spot. "Tch...What's his problem...?" Mutra muttered under his breath, picking his axe up, along with a bit of wood they had timbered over his shoulder, stumbling up to his feet. When regaining his composure, and adjusting himself to better suit his fashion of holding his supplies, "Rah!" he was suddenly hit hard by the shoulder of Korio, causing the both of them to tumble down, barely protecting him from a whizzing arrow, coming from Kruia's direction. A sickening Schlik pierced their ears. "Huff...Huff...Kruia...Almost...What's his- Korio stopped his mindless bit of babble, when a small *thump* was heard in the grass near them, a squirming tentacled being, an arrow stuck from its single, large eye, that composed of most of its body. "That thing was...Behind me...?" Mutra breathed, peering down at the grass, noticing a strange alteration. The grass was sprouting a light shade of purple.
Terraria? are you serious? i love that game! i wasnt aware there was any plot that could be fanfictionalized. anyways, you wanted tips, here they are: 1. use a word processor. i cant stress this enough. grammatical errors and spelling mistakes are the best way to keep readers away from your story. it could have the greatest plot in the world but never get read because you misspelled 'the'. 2. double space you paragraphs. that may not be how its done in books, but your audience is reading off of a computer screen. an extra space in between your paragraphs not only helps them keep their places, it also helps prevent the headache that a wall of unbroken text inevitably brings on. 3. dont use slang, unless the character his/herself uses it. it causes the reader to think lower of your writing. 'he/she cant use proper language? this is below me!' that sort of thing. that doesnt mean ou dont have to be stiff and formal; most readers prefer a bit of casualness in their reading, makes them feel more comfortable. however, how formal/informal you make it is entirely up to you. 4. have fun. if it isnt fun for you to write, it isnt fun for your readers to read. thats about all that i can think of. cant wait to read it!
OMG i know what the purple stuff is!!!!! anyways, great job. i saw no spelling errors, grammar errors, and thats the first thing i look for pretty much. the story is interesting as well. i like how you left the reader in a bit of suspense. "OMG what happened last night? whats that purple stuff?" it definitely adds interest to the story. i do have one question though. whats this > Schlik[/strike] < supposed to be? a typo of some sort?
Fff. I messed up with coding. And it was the sound of the arrow piercing the Demon Eye, supposed to be in italics, accidently ended with strike.
