This is my first time posting my lyrics here.....since I've been browsing and looking at some other fascinating lyrics. Anyways here it goes. I raise my head, I open my eyes, To see my reflection up in the sky, I think it's a dream, I have to awake, Maybe God has made a mistake, I've made some decisions that have made me ache, But this is more than a transparent lake, Now the wind is blowing, I feel refreshed, Have I experienced life at it's best yet? I don't know how much better it can get, So I walk up on the hill, The sun is so bright, I'm so relieved by this eternal light, I have hope now, I'm gonna accomplish my dream, It's quite true, As corny as it may seem. I can't believe I've come into interlude, With these Scenes Of Solitude... Yeah, that was my first poem.... I should start writing here more often. :S
Everything seemed so...unrelated. The rhyming seemed forced and wasn't very clever. For example: whats more than a transparent lake? ._. You need to consider your lyrics a bit more carefully, and don't force rhyme. "As corny as it may seem" does indeed sound very lame. The title of the poem is the only thing I really liked xD
