Say one thing that you like about someone else

Thanks for reading me Greek and Norse Mythology at bedtime all those years ago. You may have scarred me for life, but I don't regret a thing. You're the best.

 

You were an ass. You ruined one year of my life, and left me traumatized ever since. But deep down in my stupid heart, I still give two shits about you. I still think about you. I still care, and I really do hate myself for it.

You were my first real crush. I wasn't just fawning over someone who was too old or married or far away or unrealistic (though looking back now, I always knew that it wasn't going to happen; fairy tales are only just that after all). I sat a few feet from you every damn day for two years of my life. You jerk. I hate you. You ruined me. Your stupid-ass bitch of a "girlfriend" ruined my life. My so-called "best friend" went behind my back and did something I will never forgive or forget. Because of you, you fucking bastard, my heart was broken. In fact, I'm still not over it. It's been nearly three years since I first laid my eyes on you, and your idiotic behavior has still kept me from being completely at peace. You can go die. You go to a "Christian" school, but you were (and probably still are) nothing more than a goddamn motherf*cker. You can go die in a hole. You don't know what I felt; nobody knows what I've felt. I've been through so much and you made things even harder. I would be dying to talk to you yet all I could do was stay quiet whenever you were close. You laughed at a video that I made for you on the afternoon of your birthday (though I'd only just found out that same morning and prior to that I'd been swamped with homework and unable to create anything). You gave me inspiration and in return I was given insults. It was beloved by many, but because of the ridicule of a few I was forced to take it off. I've never been able to get past that, and when I was confronted by a guy who liked me this past year, all that came to mind was the hurt you'd caused me. As much as I would like to start a relationship with someone, I know I'm still not ready for a number of reasons, one of them being the wound you left that still hasn't scarred.

And yet, despite all this, you actually made me stronger. I had already been through crap before you, but you made me realize that life is tough no matter what school you transfer to or what group of people you meet. Sh*t happens, and despite that fact, I've actually managed to become just a little bit stronger because of your bullcrap. So... I guess this is me saying thanks, despite the fact that the four years you spend as a football star, womanizer and all-around ass will likely be the best years in the rest of your life.

Enjoy it while you have it, and I'll enjoy all the years after when I've been able to put my demons to rest.


Well, despite all the memories, I feel much better now. I might've overdone the tweaking and re-tweaking for nearly half an hour, but I just wanted to word this right. He will NEVER see this, but that's what I said about the video at first. The real difference is that now I know who to trust.