Online relationships

Do you think they can work out? Do you feel as though they're not "real" relationships? Please discuss.

Obviously, i support them. I feel as though relationships shouldn't really matter about physical contact, and that relationships can help to make sure that if you care about someone you care about someone for their personality and not what they look like, which is an important factor in any relationship.

 

I feel that an interaction is real whether you at or away from keyboard. Instead of IRL I like to say AFK because it makes more sense to me. Penpals have relationships, and it is the same thing to me. As for whether they can work out, I think that physical contact is needed at some time in romantic relationships, but friendships definitely work out as online-only. You have to find people who stay interesting over long periods of time and keep talking.

 

As long as the people are honest with each other about gender, age and intentions, I don't see why it shouldn't. However, romantic relationships should be in person, at least some of the time. It's kind of like a long distance relationship that way.

Also, curse my ignorance, but what does AFK mean?

 

It means 'Away From Keyboard'. I have a list of AFK friends instead of IRL friends because it makes more sense to me and is less insulting to both groups involved.

 

As others have said before me, maintaining online relationships depend on what kind of a relationship it actually is. Love and care for the other is always important in any relationships in general, but in the case of online relationships, it falls on different grounds.

Marinating a friendly relationship with a person---a penpal, or a friend who‘s moved away---is more a simpler task than maintaining a romantic relationship. A friendly-emotional connection with another can bear the hardship of distance as the need to be physically near the person is not as great. Keeping in contact via emails, letters and/or text with the said person will always alleviate the want to see the person; however, romantic relationships are difficult to maintain over the internet as they do need a touch of intimacy and physical contact (I do not mean sexual, specifically). The need and desire to be near your loved one will become overwhelming, and frustrating at some point. This comes from the fact that humans instinctively desire to be near the one they are romantically interested in; thus, if the physical connection is not made, then the romantic desire has the chance of deteriorating over time.

Of course, this does not mean that all romantically based online relationship fails. It takes a lot of determination and a great amount of sacrifice and compromise to make it work. If the said relationship was a success, ultimately it would result in the two meeting face-to-face one day. So, a permanent [romantic] online relationship is probably not possible at all.

 

Romantically;

I'm not against them. However, I don't particularly like them either. Not in regards to other people, but personally. I'd prefer to have a face-to-face relationship and when I'm in a long distance relationship, it's always a temporary thing. I don't think I could ever be happy in a romantic long-distance relationship thinking that 'we're always going to be apart'. It's always been, "Someday we'll be together."

I believe long-distance relationships can work, but it takes a lot of patience. I also believe you don't really 100% know someone until you've physically met them. For a personal example, I met Fuzzy Blue Lights over the summer and while he was pretty much the same as he is when we're talking on our own long-distance, he had physical mannerisms I wouldn't have even known about if I had never met him before. Obviously, there was nothing huge that I was just like, "lolno" about but meeting him was the time to experiment and see if we could get along with each and connect with one another physically like we can emotionally and mentally from a distance. I suppose, it was a...Are we physically compatible/do we have 'chemistry' type of thing.

Holding hands, hugging, kisses, even just high fives or watching TV together/playing video games or cooking/shopping together. Riding the bus together, prom, even arguments....all of these physical things...If I had never met him I don't think I'd ever feel as...secure as I do now. Now that I can compare the before and after, we both have a greater sense of who we are to each other and what things may look like in the future and I'm grateful for that. It's like I know for a fact he could be miles away, or he could be right here beside me, but we'd be okay. He'd still treat me a certain way, and I him and that feels awesome.

So yeah. I think they can work as long as you both trust each other and know what you both want out of the relationship. I know there can be a bond there, without having the person right there all of the time. But me personally, I couldn't just be in a long distance relationship for the hell of it with no goals.

Friendship;

Totally agree with it. Long distance friendships are <3. If I had never had long-distance friends, I...Well, I don't really know how I would have gotten through some things. I love all of you guys and everyone else. c': ​

 

I'm assuming that you're specifically talking about romantic relationships.

Do I think they're a good idea? Nope.
Do I think they can work? Slim chance...very slim chance, but it's possible.
Do I think they have enough legitimacy as a 'In real life' or 'away from keyboard' relationship? I really don't.

Two/three years ago, I would have told you that you were off your rocker for pursuing an online relationship and should get your sorry ass off the computer and get a life.
But hey, I was misinformed back then.

I used to think online relationships were a very stupid thing (I used to laugh at the drama I saw on here concerning them).
Then I found myself wanting one with somebody I've never met in person (BET YOU CAN'T GUESS WHO >∞), thought it was still a strange and silly thing, in my opinion.
That came and went and before I knew it, I was actually in one with somebody here (Bet you even more you can't guess who that one is). Do I consider it a legitimate relationship? I did and still do. But I don't think it was as legitimate of one as the one I'm in now. I saw only one picture of the girl the entire time we dated (or hell, the entire time I knew her), and it was even a blurry picture (though I'm sure she did that on purpose since she was against showing anyone her real appearance). Were my feelings real? Of course.
I've been in two relationships since then (and I don't plan on being in anymore<3) and I was in a few before then, all AFK/IRL/Physical. And I sure as hell can tell you that though I consider online relationships "real," AFK/IRL/Physical are "realer."

If you are in an online relationship, and you've been dating more than...a couple of months, I hope you know what each other looks like. More than six months? Hope you've heard the other's voices. A year? It shouldn't be a secret to family/friends at this point and, if you haven't, you should really be trying to get into a physical meeting with each other. That would, in my opinion, definitely help you guys work out.

Now, if you're 15 or 16 years old, and been dating a few months and "love each other" and planning to get married, I don't think that that's...what's the word...smart? True? Legitimate?


Some of my good friends (mostly on here) are in online relationships and I've never seen anybody happier. But they've been together a long time. However, I would give them the same advice I typed.
Online relationships where you've at least never met in person, I don't think can even be compared to a -dare I say it- real one.

 

I think they CAN work but I believe physical contact is needed otherwise it's basically just friends talking. It's the same with long distance relationships I suppose but I think it's important to meet the person before you can say you truely know them, which is what Jayn said. I have had long distance relationships before and it didn't work out for me, not saying it's the same for everyone but in this incidence it didn't work (mainly because I didn't feel attracted to the guy but physical contact probably would have helped).

Friendships, definitely, I have some great friends on this site, ones that I never hope to lose and sometimes I feel closer to them then my IRL friends. Although, there is never a guarentee that you will see them tomorrow, you may have no idea if anything has happened or if they just decided to cut the internet out their lives.

 

to me it just depends on the motive, for example, if you have a girlfriend, that you know and are intimate with, and lets say she moves to some other country, than i do not see why the relationship can´t work,

but if just have a "computer girlfriend" that you met on some site, that well...

there is no trust or intimacy, or really a relationship, and its obviously better to cherish the people around you than to search for strangers that you think you might like, on the Web.

 

Alright here it goes~

I agree with Bueno for the most part when dealing with "romantic relationships". Friendships are fine online, you play games and talk about shiz with friends online just like in person and I love my online friends. I know some of my online friends better than some of my friends I see all the time. Although I do think it's nice to actually see friends in person, because sarcasm is easier to say than type.

Now I have two experiences with online relationships I'll share, the first being a girl I met on facebook, for whatever reason we started going out. Well I was young, naive, and all around stupid 5 years ago and let's just say I didn't take the relationship as seriously as she did and there was lots of hell and ants. This taught me that yes, online relationships DO matter, allot, but if you're looking to date someone I think it's better to actually see them on a regular basis(had that girl and I actually went on a date, who knows, might have ended better).

The other online relationship I had was with girl I talked to for about 2 months, then we actually met and I really liked her(seemed at the time she shared my feelings). Well we lived about 2 hours away, but we made it work for a few months. Then she cheated on me, which was just bout the final nail in the coffin for me and online/long distance relationships.

Now semi dating my best friend of 6 years(Bless her), which is much better than the other person to person and online relationships I've had.
Anyways case and point: I think you need to physically meet and know someone to be romantically involved, myself being of the affectionate sort need to be able to hug my gf from time to time, things like that you can't always get from a long distance online relationship.

 

In both cases they can work. Obviously, if you're younger, you have to be careful that the other person isn't lying, but they can work.

One of the most important things for that, though, is that both people want the relationship to work. Both in terms of friendship and love. Fayt and I have been together for a little more than two years and at times it does get hard - when something bad happens to him, I feel like I can't do anything to help because I can't physically be there. But sometimes talking is all he needs and it works out. The distance sucks, the five hour time difference sucks, but it's no different than what would be seen in a non-long distance relationship. It's sacrifices for the other person, and while I would like to be with him, I feel like I'd get nothing done in terms of school because I'd just want to spend time with him. With an online relationship, I can Skype with him while still doing work in school and not falling behind and right now that's working out pretty well. I love him but at the same time, I know I would let that get in the way of focusing on work. If I can't focus on assignments I'll fall behind in classes, which in turn could prevent me from graduating, getting a job, having a means to visit/live with him, etc. Right now there is a balance that seems to be working out for both of us - we're both happy and I don't want to change that.
I mean yeah, meeting him this summer was amazing and the physical contact was nice and I miss it, but it's not like we'll never be able to do that again. And sometimes there's lucky breaks, like with my college, I might be able to set up an abroad program to the university he's studying at and live with him for half a year. It's hard waiting, but it's worth it in the end if you really do care about the other person.

Personally I think there is more to online relationships because it may not be based on physical appearance - it is more often because of personality rather than "whoa s/he's hot", which is the case I think with a lot of people our age. It's unfortunate, but there's truth in that. I also believe that relationships created on compatible personalities is much, much stronger than any kind of physical one. It's like a real connection rather than one based solely on sex or other physical pleasures.

As for friendships, definitely possible and definitely good. A lot of my friends are online, but that doesn't make it any less real or them any less of a good friend. Several that I met here - Advent, Rayku, and Xaale - are some of my closest friends (moreso than some I know from school) and we always have an awesome time when we hang out at conventions or just New York City. And through them I've met a lot of other awesome people and friends. Even now I have really good friends both on here and other places like tumblr that I haven't met in person but are close enough friends with that we might as well have. Just like what I said with relationships, friendships (I think) are stronger when people have more in common.

 

In my opinion and to my understanding. Online relationship's can work out with both people putting enough dedication into the relationship. Though I'm not against E-dating , it can get tiresome for a internet relationship. You can sometimes begin to miss the asset's of having a Real life relationship. But really a internet relationship can go either way depending on the paring and how dedicated they are towards each other. They can fall and cause drama or they can stay strong.

 

Where there's a will, there's a way. That's what I believe.

Btw; Long distance relationships and Online relationships are very, very different for the one's who didn't already know. "Fortunately" for you Glen, you're in both xD

Any feelings/emotions you feel towards a person are real, therefore it doesn't matter if you've met the person in real life. However, a relationship needs more than just a webcam. Of course, as long as both of the people involved want the relationship to work, it should work. However, sooner or later, you will meet each other. Part of the joy with a relationship is the physical interaction, and the ones who disagree have either never been in a full relationship (full, not meaning sex, but being able to touch each other).

However, I still think it's a legitimate relationship, but I know for a fact that it misses something. But, that might just make the first meeting even better and that doesn't mean that the relationship won't work.

 

I do think that an online/long distance relationship can work out, but it depends on how involved the two people in the relationship are and how committed they are to the relationship.

Yes, there are the obvious draw backs in being in an internet relationship; the biggest is not being physically there for them. Sometimes, you just want to hold the person's hand, give them a kiss on the cheek, or even just hold them when you know that your significant other is having a bad day. There are also times where you see other couples in public, doing small things like holding hands or just goofing around with each other, and you feel sad because you want to do stuff like that with your girlfriend/boyfriend. There's also when you talk through Skype, MSN, or some other way, and you read the text that they send you and you interpret it the wrong way. There is no voice in just plain old text, making it difficult to convey the meaning and it may lead to some kind of fight.

But, having a relationship like this is not bad. There are so many good things about having an internet relationship. With me and Twilight, I knew that she cared about me for who I was. It's nice to know that there is someone out there in the world who I can always count on. Also, it motivates me to want to save up, and be responsible, so I can meet her and see where this relationship can really take us. An internet relationship works for us because we are invested into each other.

 

I'm not exactly fond of them (just my opinion) but I don't see any problem with them either.
At some point I think they can be a bit sad and maybe get out of hand, but I also think they can be nice, as in people finding a relationship and being happy with it.

I think it's that person's choice to have a relationship with someone you don't know personally or just getting out there and 'mingling' because some relationships do work out from things like this..maybe I'm referring to online dating etc but they can lead from one thing to another e.g. Having an online relationship -> online dating with this person -> maybe finding this person's match.

Just my opinion on this so..

 

Relationships are strengthened and/or upheld by sharing a variety of experiences. Going to the movies, meeting eachother's families, making love, arguing face-to-face etc. Online relationships are limited in this variety, and I think I'd be bored with them before long. Conversations running dry, the lack of common memories to reminisce upon and possibly the temptation of (wo)men of flesh and bone when you go out... Not my kind of thing.

 

I think that online friendships are fine. no problem with them. the only thing about romantic online relationships is that you actually know the person. i think it's best to meet them in person and have conversation with them. though i have seen a few relationships go wrong because of the selfishness of one or both of the people. possible, yes. probable, can be. common, definitely. but i don't think they work out the way people think they should most times. but i could say that about any kind of relationship.

 

Well, from personal experience, i think that online romance relationships can work, unless there is lack of communication. If you're dating someone online but you hardly get to communicate due to being busy or whatevers the case, then the relationship wont work. Friendship relationships online can work better in my opinion. I've made a lot of friends online that sometimes work better than my friendships IRL. I think that if someone is going to date online then they should make sure they get to speak with the other person at least 3-4 times a week; if not more.

 

It really depends on your definition of a relationship.
Relationships are simply two people who are close to each other getting together.
Online relationships kind of break this definition though.
To me, a relationship is simply two people sharing a bond.
Because of this, online relationships have the tendency to fail or succeed because of said bonds.
However, every relationship is different, and as such who really knows?