My Poems...

Discussion in 'Archives' started by Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta, Feb 23, 2011.

  1. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    I don't really know how many of these I'll write but this is what I've come up with for now:

    You were my friend...
    That's what you said to me...
    But now you treat me like an enemy...
    There were times when I made mistakes too...
    But why can't you forgive me like I forgave you?
    Your smile was my sunshine...
    It was what kept my spirit burning bright...
    I don't know why you're doing this to me...
    No explanation is in sight...
    But until I can forget about you...
    You'll haunt me every night...
     
  2. Korosu Kingdom Keeper

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    Aw I like this poem..It's bitter sweet in a way I guess. Good Job Jaden
     
  3. Technic☆Kitty Hmm

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    I agree with KellyJ, this is a great poem. I would like to here more, keep up the great work ^_^ oh just one thing though, try to work on the structure a little bit, in the sense of adding the . . . after each line. It just kind of takes away from the effect of the song. But still, great poem!!
     
  4. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    Your words were as cold as ice
    You gave up our friendship as a lowly sacrifice
    The ice wraps it's way to my heart
    Covering every artery every last part...

    You came to me with love and also with care
    Told me how you felt. But then I was unaware...

    I continue to feel a deep emptiness within,
    I apologized but maybe there is nothing I can do to atone for my sin...

    Nothing will ever ease the pain
    Because all of my efforts to you were in vain
    I hope someday light will shine on my tomorrow
    But until then I shall forever writhe in my sorrow...
     
  5. Kaidron Blaze Kingdom Keeper

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    your poems are so heart felt sniff they're making me cry :crybaby: they're sooo good keep writing
     
  6. Korosu Kingdom Keeper

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    Again another bitter sweet poem,they’re both really good. I hope you write some more poems I would like to read them.
     
  7. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    I like to write poetry about things when I feel troubled...It's how I vent so to speak...
     
  8. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    Poem for my girlfriend:

    You are friendly, kind and caring
    Sensitive, loyal and understanding
    Humorous, fun, secure and true
    Always there, yes that's you.

    Special, accepting, exciting and wise
    Truthful and helpful, with honest sparkling eyes
    Confiding, forgiving, cheerful and bright
    Yes that's you, not one bit of spite.

    You're one of a kind, different from others
    Generous, charming, but not one that smothers
    Optimistic, thoughtful, happy and game
    But not just another, in the long chain.

    Appreciative, warm and precious like gold
    Our love won't tarnish or ever grow old
    You'll always be there, I know that is true
    And I'll always be here...always for you.
     
  9. Styx That's me inside your head.

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    It shows you care a lot about her. I'm sure she loved reading it.
     
  10. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    Every poem I've written so far is about a certain person in my life. And all the rest will be too.
     
  11. Doukuro Chaser

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    Writing about people you know really helps the words flow. Which all of your poems have, a nice flow. I like them; they're also very emotional.

    And I think she is lucky to have you. <3
     
  12. Daxa~ #stalker

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    Aww...thats such a nice poem....heh im nearly crying :/ your girlfriends very lucky to have someone care about her so much x
     
  13. KH2man13 Gummi Ship Junkie

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    These are really good, Jaden. I'm very impressed. These seem really close to the heart, and that's what makes them emotional.
     
  14. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    Another poem for my girlfriend:

    You came along
    just like a song,

    Your smile as bright and beautiful as the sun
    Without you I would have never realized that life could be so much fun
    You were there just when I thought my life was done

    At first I was unsure if Christmas Miracles were true
    But then my eyes were opened by the gift of knowing you.
     
  15. Daxa~ #stalker

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    ok...now im crying :/

    but really,you have a gift and im not joking...these are so nice and heartfelt.....made my day x
     
  16. Hitokiri Shinigami Shinta The Demon Slayer

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    For all these years I was alone and in pain
    Then you were my sunshine and took me out of the rain

    I feel as though you were sent from Heaven above
    to ease my pain and anguish with your love

    I pray that one day both of our lives will begin anew,
    On the day when we can finally meet and say "I do"
     
  17. terminallyCapricious Traverse Town Homebody

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    You've got quite the talent there; ever thought about writing music?