I had a bit of writers block while working on Pathological Paradox, so I did a quick fill from a Doctor Who kink meme on LJ. Unfortunately, Cat can't access LJ, so I shall put it here for all to see. <3 It's Gen, so don't worry about warnings or pairings or anything. The original prompt was; Eleven doesn't think he is good looking. Why? Thats all up to you. Maybe because he views himself in a negative light at times and carries that same view for his looks. BONUS: Add parts of the series where this might be seen like the dream lord or his reaction to seeing himself for the first time (the hospital/alien incident with pre-Pond Marriage). ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He didn’t like how he looked. His past regenerations had all been nice looking in their own way; Nine had had that ‘bad boy’ look about him, Four had had that wonderful curly hair, Six had had six-pack abs. And his last regeneration had been just all around sexy. (Maybe that was why so many people had tried to snog him?) Somehow, he had a hard time thinking of those men as himself. Perhaps because they were nothing like the way he was now, physically or otherwise. This regeneration, though? He hated it, these long gangly arms that were so clumsy, his awkward legs and feet that he kept tripping over. This hair that kept flopping in his face and wouldn’t behave no matter what he did to it. His much-too-skinny middle that didn’t match his baby-ish face at all. He tried to fix it with cool things, like bow-ties and fezes, but they didn’t work. Amy said his bow-tie made him look daft, and River always ruined the hats he tried to hide under. He had once tried a bit of Rory’s hair product on himself, but he had disliked that even more and immediately washed it out. When he’d first seen what Prisoner Zero had transformed into, he hadn’t believed it was who he’d regenerated into. How could he have gone from tall, gorgeous, and charming to… that? Perhaps his looks now reflected his state of mind. Of course, he’d never tell anyone any of this. Looks didn’t matter, right? Who cared what he looked like? Certainly not him, nope. He could be cheerful without looking like he stepped out of a magazine. On the bright side, maybe now he wouldn’t keep getting snogged by random women. Sometimes, when he was unneeded and thought no one would notice, he would go into the wardrobe and look at himself in the mirror with nothing but his boxers on. It was sort of a sick fascination, looking at himself. He hated it, hated himself and everything about him, but he couldn’t bring himself to look away. He’d often sit there for hours, not noticing the passage of time until someone came looking for him, and he’d quickly redress himself and step back out to the control room so as not to worry anyone. Today, in addition to the boxers, he had a few bandages wrapped around various limbs from their latest excursion into some otherworldly dangers. He didn’t need them, they didn’t do anything for him, but Rory had insisted. He honestly didn’t mind the blood, it wasn’t like it took away from anything. He’d told him to go look after Amy first, but she was fine, and he was worse off than her, Rory said. Still, it was nice that he cared. He fingered the bandages idly. He would have mostly healed by now, Time Lord stuff and whatnot, but he didn’t want to take them off just yet. He wasn’t sure whether that was to please Rory or because he didn’t want to look at the skin underneath. Maybe a little of both. He looked at himself for nearly an hour, his hatred at himself growing steadily stronger as time went by, occasionally pushing his limp hair out of his face angrily. Stupid hair. Maybe he should just chop it all off. Get a haircut like Nine had. But that would probably make him look even worse. “Doctor? Doctor, where’ve you gone this time?†He froze. Amy was looking for him. He should get back to work. Swiftly, he spun around and grabbed for his trousers from the back of a chair. He caught the rough material and pulled, but his momentum was off and he fell, hitting his side, which, incidentally, had earlier received a rather nasty bruise that had yet to heal to the extent it should. The hit caught him off guard, and he inadvertently gave a short cry of pain. He scrabbled to get back to his feet, but Amy had already heard him and opened the door to the TARDIS wardrobe. “Doctor, what’s… Are you okay?†“Hm? Oh, oh, yes, I’m fine, Pond! Just… just took a tumble is all,†he smiled. “…In nothing but your pants? Didn’t you come up here to get changed over an hour ago?†“Oh, well… I was just looking for something suitable to wear!†Amy looked at him for a long moment. “…Don’t lie to me, Doctor. There’s a million things in here that I know you’d absolutely love.†She walked over and kneeled next to where he still sat on the ground. “What’s really wrong?†“It’s nothing, really.†She was silent. Suddenly, she stood, lifting him with her and pushing him into the chair. “…You’re really skinny.†He looked at her with a mixture of confusion and disbelief. Amy barely ever commented on how he looked, apart from the clothes. Did she think he was gross, too? “…You’re always in here, Doctor, doing something. Don’t think I didn’t notice. And then I come in here with you nearly naked, when you’ve been gone for over an hour. “I’m wondering…†“W-wondering? Whatever could you be wondering about, Pond, there’s really nothing to wonder about…†“Doctor… do you like the way you look?†He instantly stopped rambling and looked at her in surprise. “I’ll take that as a no.†“I… how…†“When I was in Secondary School,†Amy began, kneeling in front of him, “I had a friend who hated how she looked. She constantly checked herself in the mirror, barely ate a thing, and took every single comment to heart. The stress nearly killed her. “I don’t want that to happen to someone I care about.†She smiled up at him. “I like the way you look. Maybe you don’t see it, but when I look at you, I see a very handsome alien who needs to have a little more confidence in himself. And maybe a better fashion sense.†She… liked the way he was? “But Amy… I’m so… gangly and awkward…†“No you’re not,†she shook her head. “You see what you’re afraid of.†He saw what he was afraid of…? He looked to the side, back into the mirror. Awkwardly, he smiled at the reflection. “See? Any girl would be lucky to be seen next to a guy like you.†She brushed his hair back slightly. “Ohh, and look at those eyes. Green eyes are lucky you know.†“I’ve never heard that one before,†he chuckled. “I know, I just made it up.†That got them both laughing. “So cheer up, yea?†she said, pulling him into a quick hug. He nodded into her shoulder. “Yea.†“ood. Then put some trousers on and take us to a planet with edible food.†She left, and he began wandering around looking for clothes he liked, wondering where he could take his companions next. Maybe he didn’t like how he looked, but he could try. Lucky green eyes were certainly better than the boring brown ones he’d had last time. And the entire time he remained in the wardrobe that day, he didn’t once look in the mirror.
This is well written and interesting indeed, though I don't know anything at all about Doctor Who, (aside from the fact that the name of it is Doctor Who) so, I don't really understand who the characters are... but all in all, still interesting. It captured my attention long enough for me to read it.... and that is saying something.
Thank you for doing this, Fearless. This is actually a different side to Eleven that I never would've thought of. It was pretty enjoyable and quite relatable.
