Mental Health Hotline

Discussion in 'The Spam Zone' started by Sexy Sheva, May 11, 2009.

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  1. Sexy Sheva Banned

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    Hello, and Welcome to the Mental Health Hotline

    If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

    If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

    If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

    If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

    If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

    If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

    If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press - no one will answer.

    If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

    If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on line.

    If you have amnesia press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number and your mother's maiden name.

    If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

    If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

    If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

    If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

    Audio <3
    http://www.bouldertherapist.com/html/humor/Audio/Psychiatric_Office_Answering_Machine 1.mp3


    no offense to anyone, i just found this online xD
     
  2. Firekeyblade Hollow Bastion Committee

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    Oh my god.....XD....that's very funny.
     
  3. TheMuffinMan Banned

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    boy sure is 2001 in here
     
  4. Absol Hollow Bastion Committee

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    Heard this quite a while ago :v
     
  5. Atlas Gummi Ship Junkie

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    If you like stupid, old, unfunny copypasta, please hang yourself. There's really no hope for you.
     
  6. Sora March Twilight Town Denizen

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    My friends called this hotline.....
    It's just a recording....
     
  7. Sexy Sheva Banned

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    why is it that i can't post, without being humiliated ._.
     
  8. Jayn

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    Because they're assholes. :/


     
  9. cronoking Chaser

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    Because people cant resist replying to jokes with their generic, overused marks and internet slang like copypasta which isn't delicious at all? :D
     
  10. Styx That's me inside your head.

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    You're the one making fun of people with personality disorders, dear.
     
  11. Animaniagirl Traverse Town Homebody

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    I have seen this ages ago, but the 000 one is the police number here lol xD so just call the police? o.o
     
  12. Sexy Sheva Banned

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    this is what happens when you don't read the whole thing

    v


    besides, I'm OCD and i wasn't offended by whoever made this
     
  13. Catch the Rain As the world falls down ♥

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    I'm actually not going to do anything this time Cupcake, for the simple reason that some people with mental health disorders could be as offended by this as you are by Atlas and TMM mocking you for posting it.

    It is a very old copypasta, so I can understand why they commented as they did. True the comment about your weight was un-needed and I shall delete that now, but in this case I am not going to do anything else.
     
  14. Sexy Sheva Banned

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    i knew you wouldn't warn them but i was hoping you would delete it x3 <33
    thanks <333
     
  15. Catch the Rain As the world falls down ♥

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    You're welcome but I do have to add, in future if you get offended by what other people post, maybe keep an eye on what you yourself are posting. Everything can be taken offensively by someone, you just need to learn the balance between what actually is offensive and what is something that really needs to be ignored or laughed off.


    I think that is a huge problem for the majority of this site.
     
  16. Sexy Sheva Banned

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    i didn't really think it would offend anyone, because i have OCD and it didn't offend me, but now that i think about it, others have different standards...

    i'll watch it (:

     
  17. Catch the Rain As the world falls down ♥

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    I just have one more thing to add.

    I find it absolutely hilarious that you often complain about people harrassing or being offensive towards you, when I just found one of your posts claiming that the staff acted in the wrong to remove someone who actually WAS a threat to members.


    So before I end up saying something I might regret

    ~Locked~
     
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