KHV Plays Text Adventures

Ok

 

~Open pocket~

 

Opening your gown reveals a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is, a buffered analgesic, and pocket fluff.

 

『Look in pocket』

 

Inspect analgesic. Look N.

 

It looks like your gown contains:
a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is
a buffered analgesic
pocket fluff

You see nothing special about the buffered analgesic.
[It's basically aspirin.]

You used the word "n" in a way that I don't understand.

 

Drop analgesic.

Look North.

Walk North.

 

『Take the buffered analgesic』

 

Dropped.

You used the word "north" in a way that I don't understand.

You can't go that way.

It slips through your fumbling fingers and hits the carpet with a nerve-shattering bang.

 

~ Walk to the south~

 

You used the word "south" in a way that I don't understand.

 

『Pick up the analgesic』
『Take the analgesic』

 

It dances by you like a thing possessed.

Astoundingly, a bulldozer pokes through your wall. However, you have no time for surprise because the ceiling is collapsing on you as your home is unexpectedly demolished to make way for a new bypass. You are seriously injured in the process, but on your way to the hospital a fleet of Vogon Constructor ships unexpectedly arrives and demolishes the Earth to make way for a new hyperspace bypass.

Better luck next life.
[Welcome to Dark Souls The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.]

We are about to give you your score. Put on your peril-sensitive sunglasses now. (Hit RETURN or ENTER when ready.) >

[Sorry, I can't input your commands or the game will bug out and we won't be able to get our score or restore the saved game.]

 

~Return~

 

Your score is 0 of a possible 400, in 19 turns.

Would you like to start over, restore a saved position, or end this session of the game?
(Type RESTART, RESTORE, or QUIT): >
[Say RESTORE and the name of your saved game or say RESTART to return to the beginning. Saying QUIT will end the game and initiate a poll for the next game, but you don't want that yet. You haven't even gotten the babel fish!]

 

... MFW i read that paragraph

 

~Restore: KHV_BossedUp~

 

Ok.

[Here are some basic commands so you guys don't have to go through them again.]
>Look around
Bedroom
The bedroom is a mess.
It is a small bedroom with a faded carpet and old wallpaper. There is a washbasin, a chair, and a window with the curtains drawn. Near the exit leading south is a phone.
There is a flathead screwdriver here.
There is a toothbrush here.

>Look in pocket.
Opening your gown reveals a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is, a buffered analgesic, and pocket fluff.

>inventory
You have:
a splitting headache
no tea
your gown (being worn)
It looks like your gown contains:
a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is
a buffered analgesic
pocket fluff