I'm just broken....

The subjects really explained in the title.
I'm confused,broken,extremely upset and my anger at my life is unrivalled.
It feels like everyone hates me, even on this forum.It was like my refuge, my escapism but now slowly it just feels like everything else.All the members on here have just gotten cold and have forgotten that there are other people on the other end of the conversations on here and that it isn't just them on here.
The only things i've been able to feel this week are anger and pain.This has been going on for awhile even as i was helping out alot of friends with there life problems and giving support and advice on this forum.
I feel like everyone hates and that i'm a Pariah to everyone and everything.
I don't know who or what i am anymore.The best way to describe me now is "I'm inside the darkness, outside the endulgances of society's understanding".........

 

Your a very cool person I do know that.

Outside of the computer world: Who exactly are you talking about? Your closest friends or just those random people who seem like friends but not really?

Kh-v: Try making yourself noticed and try making new friends. I know you have the potential to make a friend out of just about everyone here. Just looking around, many people here respect you greatly but they may not always show it but they really do. I for one respect you greatly.

 

I used to be respected but no respects me anymore.In the Outside world i'm a fleeting memory to everyone, including my friends.I have nothing and no one.

 

Here I hardly see you post anymore publically. If your feeling lonely at the outside world then try socializing more.

You just seem a little quiet is all.

 

I actually socialise alot....i post plenty it just my posts have come to be ignored now.

 

Are you socializing with the right people? I guess you blend in here to the point your not very noticed.

 

You seem to know what's apparently wrong, right? Think about all of those problems thoroughly and come up with some solutions. Ponder about what you do in your everyday life: who your friends are, how people in general treat you, what you have or have not done to yourself to fit in with society, et caetera.

Go look at yourself in the mirror..... what do you see? For example: what are you wearing, how's your hair, what is your physical qualities? Then, look deeper: How do you actually feel, what are your habits, have you done anything you know was wrong, are your ethics solid and moral boundaries set, who are you to yourself?

 

Zexion when i look in the mirror i see a stranger looking back at me.
I've thought and thought and thought about this but no matter what i do nothing can solve it...i've solved many life problems,both my own and others but this one is different.....
I can probably let you hear what i feel like; http://www.youtube.com/watch?gl=IE&hl=en-GB&v=k6CtLWrxi8Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XsxaVEwQzw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaSazdAtjJk

 

I can't tell if you're trying to be poetic or not, hm? If you see a stranger in the mirror, it's always nice to say hello. Go ahead, try it! Turn off your computer screen for a bit or something and say it. And how is this different from any other problem in life? What if it is the life problem? Analyze the hell out of the problem and fix it immediately, that's how every solution is reached.

 

If is a stranger what you see make it your closest friend.

 

i can't befriend it...i need to find who i am...find who i used to be...find what i will become...

 

You really got me here.
I have the same exact problem. I don't even know what to say, because I feel the same.
It wouldn't be right for me to give advice, but I haven't talked to you much.
Hopefully we'll get the chance if you want to.
Take care.

 

You ain't alone just open your eyes and you'll realize how many people like you and respect you. Believe me. :)

 

i wish i could.
If you look at the view theres 67 and out of those views only a few were nice enough to even respond.I've helped close to everyone that has entered the help with life column and out all of them only about 5 members replied.That just goes to show you doesn't it...

 

Dude wtf?! D8 I respect you, and so do most of the other members. Methinks you're overreacting a wee tad. I can't remember anyone being cruel to you, but if they have I can't imagine anyone taking it seriously.

 

I felt like this last semester. all my friends had left me to go to college, I always worked my butt off, never gave myself free time, did things for others even at the cost of my own happiness, nobody posted on my facebook. It was like i was completely forgotten. and then something happened which made me think that things were getting better, but it only made things worse.

I started getting in touch with an old crush of mine, she was my biggest crush ever. we began to hangout and we socialize a whole bunch. things were looking up until the night I ask her to go bowling with me. well she brought a whole bunch of friends along who didn't even know me, we went out somewhere to eat, and I was completely ignored. And then when it was time for us to go bowling, she left me and a friend of hers over at the alley while she went off with her other friends went off to get alcohol. Now I don't drink alcohol for personal reasons, and she knew that, but that didn't stop her. so I wait for over an hour for her to get back. we end up having to wait in a long line for a bowling alley. so what does she do then, well she head off with one of her guy friend with alcohol in hand.

now one bottle of this type of alcohol was like having 5 beers. she had one and a half of those bottles. I end up waiting in line alone for over another hour, until finally one of her friends come by all drunk and all. And guess what she tells me. the girl who I had the biggest crush on ever was getting it on with that guy friend of hers in the back of his truck. I couldn't staying any long so i left. went i got home, i broke into tears. she was the one that was helping me make it through the semester, and she just totally ruined our friendship. The story goes on. supposedly she liked me too, but she ruined it. She did a whole bunch of other things to me too after that. I barely made it through that semester. I had to limp on after that.

I don't really know what to tell you other than this. things do get better. you just need to be a trooper. it makes you all the more stronger too.

is there something that you are not mentioning, something that is the cause of your anger and pain. if not, then you could be suffering from, i forget what they are called, but they are depressions that come about for no reason at all. maybe you are bored of the way your life is, if so then do something different. go bowling.... just not with someone like that girl I told you about. I love bowling, and so do most people that I know. i may suck at it but I still love it! sometimes you need to be the one who gets your friends to do things with you. that's the way it is for me usually. I have to do the work.

If there is something troubling you and it is something similar to the story i told you, then talk to a good friend of yours. you said that you spent the week helping friends with their problems, well its time they help you out with yours. it always helps to get things off your chest.

If something really bad is troubling you, then you may want to seek professional help.

you can't leave problems inside of you. it just makes it worse. you have to let them out before you explode.

 

Actually, seeing your name is topic creator is the main reason I'm reading this. Because I do respect you. I haven't forgotten the support I got from you in the "Did we do the right thing?" thread.

They are flustered. You, the tower, the one they know will help you when needed, needs help. How will they deal with that? How can they help you when your own wisdom and experience (the one that has helped them out) falls short this time? It's not apathy that holds them back, it's powerlessness. The same reason why it took me so bloody long to reply and why I haven't given you an answer on why everyone could be abandoning you.


In any case, I hope things will brighten up for you real soon.

 

Consider that, as far as I have seen, we have a 3-to-1 ratio on this site in favor of guests who CAN'T respond, so maybe a third of those views have been members, and of those, only those who have advice or something to add have responded, to avoid creating unnecessary spam. Also, many of the views have been people coming back to view a new comment, not a new person viewing the thread.

I saw this thread, felt bad for you, but didn't respond because I couldn't think of anything someone else had already said. Now that I have something to say, I am responding. I don't typically post in this section anyways, because I have no life :D

So yes, you are actually noticed, otherwise no one would have responded to this.

 

dude dont feel this way. alot of people respect you im sure of it. ive seen some of your stuff in the forums and im impressed. besides childofturin ( sorry if i spelled it wrong) yall are discussion masters.
what ever your going through dude you can make it out with great ease okay?

 

those thoughts used to happen to me too. but for me it was just a phase, one that passed. i was ignored in real life and people lashed out in anger at me at some times, but it didn't last long, i guess my friends just needed a break from me for a while, it happens. all i can hope is that it's the same for you.