where should i start... there was this girl that sat next to me before i science. this was earlier in the school year. One day she started talking to me. I never noticed her until that day honestly. I was fine and dandy until she was like my friend. I, being the one everyone picks on for no reason, was a little shocked at this. I thought of her as very nice, which very much was. Problem one- i developed a crush on her. even today i regret this. On a fun little field trip, i told someone, who in turn told her. AFTER i told him not to. She wasn't disgusted at all. she looked surprised, and sounded like she was full of disbelief. she stopped talking to me altogether. I tried getting her attention a few times, by now the crush was a bit larger, and failed. Problem two- my "friend" cannot be trusted with anything that has to do with relationships. I went up to my friend one day and admitted to him that i liked this girl. he told his friends, who teamed up to exagerate it and spread a very false rumor that she and i were going out. then they harrassed her for it. Guess who she blamed for the rumor? ME. She told ME to stop spreading the rumor that i had just figured out about then and there. I had nothing to do with it. now she hates me for something that i did not do. I want to say something about it, but i'm just too mad at her for blaming the person she knew that liked her for something that someone who liked anyone wouldn't ever do. I ended up punching someone in the face for harrassing ME. She broke my heart, yet i feel it isn't exactly over until she knows the facts. Please help KHV i do not come to the help section with my own problems often.
That's tragic, sounds like your "friends" are the ones at fault here. You might want to get some new friends to hang out with, or hang out by yourself. It doesn't seem ideal, but if that's the way everyone at your school is going to treat you then... Also, you can always go tell her the truth. You didn't spread the rumors, so you shouldn't be afraid to defend yourself to the girl you like. If she doesn't believe you, then obviously, she's not worth your time anyway. Anyone who would believe rumors instead of coming to the source is definitely not good enough for you.
Just go ahead and tell her. Do you still have a crush on her? I couldn't really tell since you said you were mad at her. You should swallow your nerves and confront her. Be honest, say you did used to like her, but you never did anything beyond that. Hey, maybe even you guys can become friends in the end. Sounds like she'd be better than your current "friends". I wish you all the best. :3
Thanks for the help. I'm scared to go up to her because i am afraid of her. I don't want her to hurt me agian. But, yes, i still have a crush on her.
I had a veeery similar problem like 6 years ago, and from experience I can say that there is no real solution apart from not hanging out with your "friend" who betrayed you by gossiping. People make rumours about anyone who they can - it's just a stupid humanity thing. Don't ignore the girl 'cause thats stupid. But don't act any differently to her than you did before she found out you liked her. Just don't spend any time with your "friend". Because they suck. And they aren't your friend for being so stupid. When the rumours die down then everything will go back to normal. It's not you who is going insane it is the world.
If she hates you because she thinks you started the rumour when you didn't there is actually nothing you can do at the moment. only do stuff with her if you have to, because if you try and make things better they can only get worse. Since she believes one thing about you, trying to tell her something different is going to make her think you are lying. That is where the hate is coming from as she doesn't trust you. I solved this problem just by waiting it out, and not getting involved with the girl who put me in the same situation you are in now. EDIT: The previous posters have said go ahead and tell her, but I know from experience that talking about how you feel makes the girl embarass you in front of others. When I tried telling her she screamed at me and everyone around heard it, as she didn't want to hear what I had to say in private. Girls who don't trust you because of rumours are, quite honestly, b****es.
I know from experience that she is not mean enough to do that. Not to mention I have like 1,000,000 ways to get her to believe me. I waited a while. The rumors are dead, the people were personally punished by me. I am just straight up afraid of her. I had someone go in and find out if she hated me. She apparently said she "disliked me". I just took it like she hated me.
If she can be manipulated that easy, then there's no reasoning. Forget about it...if you are able to let go, forget about her?... Harsh, but it has effectiveness.
I think she just got a bit scared when she heard those fake rumors. She stopped talking to me in November. she started "disliking me" in Febuary. BEFORE she "disliked me", i attempted talking to her, and when i achieved success, she smiled and stuff. she acted nervous. i'm guessing that she liked me at one point, but was just spooked away from that.
i'll give it a shot, she might have cooled down after 7 months. And for the record, when i try not to pay attention to her so she won't get angry, (not saying she will. safety purposes) i struggle because she i pretty damn cute on top of seriously the nicest girl in the school. When she got mad at me, and told me to stop spreading when i did nothing, she looked scared, almost as if she was going to cry. Which i honstly did before.
Yeah in my experience her eyes were watering when she was angry at me D: after 7 months it would have cooled down a lot. She will still remember but you will have proved that you aren't spreading rumours. I don't think it will take as long as 7 months, when she treats you normally you will know she's gotten over it.
I seriously think you should just talk to her. Just go up to her, tap her on the shoulder, and tell her "Hey. You know, I... I didn't start those rumors, you know. It's okay if you don't believe me, I just wanted to tell you that." If she still 'dislikes' you, then she's not the girl for you.
I will try but there will be almost 0 chance of me even getting that close. I am a nervous train wreck when it comes to this.
