I need some advice

give it to me.

 

If you ever find perfume that doesn't seem to work, don't look directly into the nozzle while trying to push it down. Can end painfully.

 

Buy donuts.

 

God damn it.

 

Drink milk.

 

Always believe in your sempai.

 

If you are speaking to someone who does not make sense, in all likelihood that person is not real.

 

Do yoga daily and keep your shoulders back, not hunched forward.

 

dont **** your neighbors dog, but do shave their goldfish.

 

If you see a lump that's larger than your roomate in the other bed one night...

Find another place to stay.

 

Never wipe yer bum wi a jaggy nettle.

 

Don't make fun of asians.

 

keep doin what youre doin