I don't know about your teachers but...

Discussion in 'The Spam Zone' started by cstar, Jun 7, 2014.

  1. cstar stay away from my waifu

    Joined:
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    My teachers say some weird ****. I'll quote some of the more memorable quotes of the week.

    Music:
    "Yes, and Susan B. Anthony is the only American woman to be featured on our currency."
    "What about Sacajawea?"
    "She's not American."
    "..."
    "WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS-"
    "I don't... I don't want to get into a debate right now."

    "We all march to the beat of our own drummer... except we are in band. There is no such thing as an individual while we have a percussion section."

    History:
    "I'm sorry to tell you there will only be two grades this term. Now I know some of you probably just freaked out but if you decided not to do your work. You're in AP. You're going to fail. Sucks to be you."

    "Why do we call them smartboards if they just keep doing really stupid things.."
    (random kid) "Is it calibrated?"
    "...maybe I'm not the smartboard."

    Woodshop:
    "I'll be back faster than you can say Ticonderoga."

    "The chickens have hit the fan."
    "What?"
    "DO I NOT SPEAK LOUD ENOUGH FOR YOUR IPOD BROKEN EARS."

    "COLLEEN."
    "Yo?"
    "HAVE YOU GOTTEN WOOD YET?"
    "What?"
    "Wrong question...PENETRATION?"
    "WHAT?!"
    "Have we successfully allowed the wood stain to penetrate the wood?"
    (random kid) "Do you do this on purpose?"
    "What do you mean?"

    Chemistry:
    "Huh... just when I thought nothing could surprise me anymore, there's a kid named Gullible on the roof..."
    (class looks out the window to see)
    "Now that you have met Gullible please look back at the board."

    English:
    "I need to publicly apologize to all the kids who noticed the website on my computer yesterday it was... not appropriate..."
    (silence)
    (random kid) "Wait so why is watching The Hangover in school considered inappropriate?"
     
  2. Misty gimme kiss

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    By far one of my best memories of public school was hearing my English teacher mutter under her breath "sometimes I wish corporal punishment wasn't illegal."
     
  3. Gamefreak103 A Freak of Games

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    In a funny way, a weird thing one of my high school teachers said made me create the original Science vs Religion thread.
    Oh how that thread went wrong...
     
  4. Ienzo ((̲̅ ̲̅(̲̅C̲̅r̲̅a̲̅y̲̅o̲̅l̲̲̅̅a̲̅( ̲̅̅((>

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    My English teacher was all sorts of weird, once he spent part of a lesson telling us a wonderful story of him and his wife on holiday having a wonderful time until they returned home to the hotel one night. Both were itching like crazy and discovered they had lice... "and not just in our head hair".

    The story must have been relevant to the class but for the life of me I don't know how.
     
  5. KeybladeSpirit [ENvTuber] [pngTuber]

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    I once had an English teacher who had to be well into his 60s who is occasionally talk about some spy show called Nikita, mainly to comment on how the main girl from it is "kinda hot."
     
  6. LARiA Twilight Town Denizen

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    My Chemistry teacher informed the class of which gases & chemical compounds are most adequate for committing suicide once.
     
  7. DigitalAtlas Don't wake me from the dream.

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    Back in high school, I had a government teacher who taught us all the easiest way someone could commit bio-terrorism. Ah, Catholic school.
     
  8. Patman Bof

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    Chemistry teacher : and once you' ve mixed tube A and tube B you' ll get ... ya know what, I probably shouldn' t tell you, mix' em first.

    *all ten workgroups mix a full to the brim tube of the mysterious recipe*

    Chemistry teacher : So once those two are mixed you get stink bomb fluid. *rushes to the nearest window*
     
  9. Jin うごかないで

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    I remember back through primary and highschool everyone used to trade YGO cards even the teachers. at least for the first few years of highschool used to win cards for doing class competitions and stuff