Have you noticed the price of bread has gone up lately?

Have you noticed the price of bread has gone up lately? I'm sure you haven't, what with you buying all your fancy carbonated sugar drinks and chocolate fudge-filled mud pies, and all that other sweet stuff. But yes, sadly the price has gone up. How you might wonder? Well it is a simple analysis of the way the economic market dips and dives according to supply and demand, which of course is all a factor of people.

It is a well known fact that the economy of a country functions on a simple system consisting of manufacturers, their products, and the people that purchase said products. Of course the Snivelnod Zongel Beasts of Yosetty Magnitof Prime have some how found themselves a part of this 3-- or rather 4-- cog system we know as economy, but since we have neither heard of their species, their planet, or discovered the means to travel as far so as to discover their species and planet, we have simply been continuing our existence believing in a 3 cog system and wouldn't ever dream of implementing a fourth from a place as far as Yosetty Magnitof Prime-- of course whose distance we can't even fathom.

Right. Supply and demand is facilitated by the people. Now onto the bread and those that buy it.

Now you might think that the majority of bread from your local super market is purchased by loving mothers and fathers who wish for their growing lads and lasses to to have the daily intake requirement of grain that every health and food nutrionalist convinces them is the proper amount of said grain that a growing child should consume. Well you couldn't be farther from the truth. In today's world, that loving mother and father work to bring home an income and are a part of the force that drives the economy. They're real estate agents, big corporate CEOs, small business owners, and, lets not forget, consumers of other products besides bread. Because let's face it, to be a reliable nutritionalist you can't simply recommend grain while neglecting the other four food groups. On another such note the protein and essential nutrients that are contained in meat can also be substituted by things like tofu and other vegetable based productes. This of course prompts another question: have you noticed that the price of meat has gone down as of late? But of course that's an entirely different spiel all together, and besides out of this entire paragraph all you really had to grasp was the fact that mommy and daddy aren't the one's buying a majority of the bread in the world. So who is?


One such unfortunate statistic concerning our planet is that there are an awful lot of old people that are unable to do much except get out of bed and walk. And where do they walk? The local super market. Now you may ask yourself: "What on Earth does bread have to do with old people?". They purchase it of course silly! But not to provide their grandchildren with the daily intake requirement of grain that every growing boy and girl require. That's what parents are for. No-no, the swarming legions of elderly that flock to the super market to purchase bread simply to walk over to their local ponds and feed the ducks that mingle there. Now it's a problem when one of two old people do this. But as the spectacle snowballs into literally hundreds of old people visiting the pond each day to feed the ducks you get a multitude of bread companies like Dempsters starting to equate the price of bread with the alarming amounts of flour that need to be brought in to accomodate the demand in bread for not only the elderly, but everyone else.

But just as well the ducks grow far too plump to flee the sounds of hunting dogs, much less the ponds in which they were fed, allowing prices for foi gras to drop ever so nicely.

 

This sounds a lot like Douglas Adams's writing. Did you find this somewhere, or make it up?

 

I blame gas prices.
Higher gases means prices on everything rise.

 

No one cares.

 

His writings have inspired a number of mine including this one.

 

My dog is looking at squirrels.

 

My cat is eating squirrels :/.

I also had to shower in a sprinkler this morning. Outside. Front lawn.

In other related news, it turns out that the price of bread is rising.

 

( *thinking to self* There's no way I'm reading all that... ._.; )

Roxas, what's up with your usertitle, man...? o.o;

 

Outdoor showers rock.

 

Here we just have rain - loads of it. Does that count?

 

True, they do. I mean I had all this shampoo and soap on me, but the sprinkler wasn't very good for showering. It was freezing too! But it was like over 90 degrees so I was fine.

 

Especially in the dead of summer. 33 + degrees man.

 

You live in England?

 

The light dawns.

I'm surprised you took the time to write all that, then. Good for you.

 

How did you guess? One of the wettest bits it seems. We still have hose pipe bans in summer though! XD

 

I feel bad that he spent time writing all that and now we're talking about outdoor showers.

 

I have some unrealistic theory that England is going to eventually erode of the face of the planet. :\

 

We have a great conspiracy to have all the rain!! Mwahahaha!

 

No one's talking about the bread!

If that's really what the text was about...

I kinda got lost.

 

I ate breakfast at my college today. There's a small restaurant on campus that gives you scrambled/fried eggs with sausage or bacon with tea or coffee for three bucks.

Oh, and buttered toast.