Okay, so this is just alittle bit of a book I've been wanting to write. This is all I got, because I've been sidetracked on something else I've been wanting to write. xD So umm, CnC is really needed. Thank you for reading. :3 Chapter One: Uncompleted It felt chilly out tonight, Maybe snow? I smirked at the useless thought it never snowed here, we’d be lucky to get rain! A shiver raced down my spine, as the windy gust picked up. I peered threw the sniper lens, checking for any frequent movements. “I’ve been in the cold, for too damn long!†A husky, dull voice shouted behind me and I couldn’t help out a wide grin. “Oh really Sam?†I shouted back, as I turned to face him. His body was hidden behind his thick black rob, his teeth chattering. I chucked, knowing he was just over-reacting, but that’s Sam for ya’! He’s the big and only baby in our group. An it made no difference to us if he changed his ways or not, he’ll always be our big baby. I sighed heavily, glanced briefly threw the lens once again. “I’m tired, can’t we just worm our ways in and get him that way?†“It makes not difference the way we destroy our target.†I chattered threw my teeth, mockingly. He smirked and pulled out his cell phone, I always hated tough’s things. Loud and annoying, you never know when you’ll need one, but still, annoying. “What are you doing?!†I shouted in a worry tone. Anything thing about Sam, is everything is done his way. “ Calling someone.†He grinned, making that stupid look I always hated. He dialed the number, and put the contraction up to his ear. It was so silent outside, I to heard the ringing tone way over here. “Hello?†A unfamiliar voice answered, sounded like a women. I quickly placed my finger on the trigger, glancing nervously threw the lens once again. A light flickered on as Sam continued chatting away, drowning all the silence away. I held my breath as the door swung open, echoing a crackling sound, followed by a click. Sam, I would guess, did what he needed. A muscular man stepped threw the doorway, looking anxiously in any direction his eyes could lay on. Making a slit nod, signing that the area was secure, another man dreaded out. “Hmm… Jamie Duffler.†I grinned, as Sam chuckled that deep throat chuckle when he knows he’s done something right. Duffler look anxious to escape, knowing what he knew I’d probably look like that too. As he folded a white envelope and - dabbing his head at the same time, he was sweating like a pig, sheesh!- shoving it in his left beast pocket. The muscular guy from before jumped and stood between me and my sniper lens, glancing around again making positive the area was clear of unwanted predators. Before I knew it a faint crunching sound echoed from my blind side. I froze, not knowing what to expect, but with my luck it wasn’t anything good. The crunching sound was getting louder, but it sounded as it was coming from everywhere from all four sides. I left the sniper and turned to face where Sam was, gone! What the hell! I pulled the sniper to the ground and frantically looked around me. “Where the hell did that idiot go!†My heavy breathing was producing to much white clouds about my mouth, now you’d know it was to damn cold! I stood from my position, and looked around again. Before I knew it I was making so much noise that I didn’t notice the white lights. Dizziness, and light headedness. I glanced to where Duffler was and the muscular guy from before was shooting blindly at me. A medal melting sensation hit me hard around my right beast. The circular motion making me fly back, hitting the rooftop hard with a slam. I kicked myself up and drew the sniper back up and pulled the trigger four times blindly. I took hold of the support legs and broke them off the gun and ran. I ran with massive acceleration, and flew over to the next roof. More gun fires drowned out the once silent night along side with screeches. I glanced over my shoulder, the blood loss from my chest left large amounts of blood line trails. I wasn’t thinking straight all I knew was that I needed to kill this man. This most dangers man alive. Jamie Duffler. My feet stop and I dropped to my knees shooting more rounds Hitting muscle man in the right shoulder and blowing off a ear. I ran jumping back and forth from different rooftop and shooting, shooting like crazy. Till my gun jerked, damn, the stupid thing was out of ammo! Ammo, ammo, where is the stupid ammo?! More flashing lights all around me, my heads spinning. Either it’s me, or him. This is it, my last resort, Sam, you better be alright. I ran towards the edge of the roof and jump as high and hard. I felt another melting sensation on the side of my face and more of my blood is spilled in decoration on the puffy white snow. I charged at the muscle moron with a bare fist and my handy dandy hunters knife from my back pocket. I threw my fist hard against his rock hard chest making him stumble back. With his counter attack also fistful right in my face making my blood dance into the snow. I kick hard with both my feet into one of his ankles trying desperately for him to land on his butt. No go. He stumbles back, and grabs hold of my left foot, as he twist me into midair. I couldn’t help but yelp, as my foot disconnects off my leg. I hit the ground hard as I scramble on my foot. Muscle-man grabs hold of my right arm and supposedly the knife… wait the knife?! Lying way on the other side of muscle-man. So instead he grabs a handful of hair and pulls. Screams kill every other sound away. I kick hard into his stomach but he makes no move. I kick till I kick the spot I’m aiming for. There, finally, he releases me. I limb my way over him and dash over to the knife. I felt passing wind aim for my feet but guess I’m to fast. I jump hard off my good foot and land inches away from the knife, beginning to crawl I felt strong hands grab hold of my foot. Damn it!! So this is how it went, I’m kicking with my all my might into the guys face while I’m slowly making my way to toughing the knife. I felt myself distant from my weapon, and my life falling right threw my fingers. No, it’s not gonna end this way, It’s not! I let muscle-man pull me into his grasp. I’m looking right into his face as he’s about to beat me to death. My chance. He pulls back his fist and I go straight for his eyes, clawing them out from his skull. Slowing smooching my way into his brain, I toss out the slimy junk that was once his eyes. - Felt like I was playing in wet Plato eeeewwww!- And poke hard into his brain, slimy wet hard brain. Till he falls over, I crawl away and grab the knife and strike it into his head. Making sure the guy was dead I hit him a few more times. I made it, but wait, I’m missing something, that stupid man Jamie Duffler! “ Dammit all!!†Angrily I look around everywhere. Noticing that my left eye is now all red with blood. Not just my eye, but all around me. “ Dan is so gonna blow after this.†I take my time getting back to the roof looking for any sign of Sam, and a phone. I was so eager to leave for the mission that I forgot to grab my ear set. Dan is so gonna get pissed. With the clean up crew and Sam. Damn him, he better have gone for backup or something, I didn’t jump off the roof this time afraid I’ll snap my other foot so I take my sweet time limping my way over the building that Jamie was hiding at. The door was hanging on one hinge and the floor was covered in sparking shards of glass. ---------- Thoughts, comments, rates, ect. <:]
Very nice job Skittles. Very descirptive of every moment and I love how you put the Dialouge(SP?) in the middle of it <3 Very nice. 10/10
I like your premise, but you need to fix your grammar, spelling, and syntax. There are many errors with these three things and I think you need to take a look at the basic rules of the language to get a better idea of what is kosher to do and what is a big no-no.
Umm.. *ish very slow* What now? I see what your saying about everything else.. but this thingy..story hasn't been touched for some time. xP So you mind giving me some of my mistakes that I maybe able to fix? :3 EDIT: Thank guys! ^.^ I'll keep up the hard work. And I'll add more dialog. :3
