Genie in a bottle

A Husband takes his wife to play her first game of golf. Of course, the
wife promptly hacked her first shot right through the window of the
biggest house adjacent to the course.

The husband cringed, 'I warned you to be careful! Now we'll have to go up
there, find the owner, apologize and see how much your lousy drive is
going to cost us.'

So the couple walked up to the house and knocked on the door. A warm
voice said, 'Come on in.' When they opened the door they saw the damage
that was done: glass was all over the place, and a broken antique bottle
was lying on its side near the pieces of window glass.

A man reclining on the couch asked, 'Are you the people that broke my
window?'

'Uh...yeah! , sir. We're sure sorry about that,' the husband replied.

'Oh, no apology is necessary. Actually I want to thank you. You see, I'm a
genie, and I've been trapped in that bottle for a thousand years. Now
that you've released me, I'm allowed to grant three wishes. I'll give you
each one wish, but if you don't mind, I'll keep the last one for my self.'

Wow, that's great!' the husband said. He pondered a moment and blurted
out, 'I'd like a million dollars a year for the rest of my life.'

'No problem,' said the genie 'You've got it, it's the least I can do. And
I'll guarantee you a long, healthy life!'

'And now you, young lady, what do you want?' the genie asked.
'I'd like to own a gorgeous home complete with servants in every country
in the world,' she said.

'Consider it done,' the genie said. 'And your homes will always be safe
from fire, burglary and natural disasters!' 'And now,' the couple asked
in unison, 'what's your wish, genie?'



'Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, and haven't been with a
woman in more than a thousand years, my wish is to have sex with your
wife.'

The husband looked at his wife and said, 'Gee, honey, you know we both now
have a fortune, and all those houses. What do you think?'

She mulled it over for a few moments and said, 'You know, you're right.

Considering our good fortune, I guess I wouldn't mind, but what about you,
honey?'

You know I love you sweetheart,' said the husband. I'd do the same for you!'



So the genie and the woman went upstairs where they spent the rest of the
afternoon enjoying each other. The genie was insatiable. After about
three hours of non-stop sex, the genie rolled over and looked directly
into her eyes and asked, How old are you and your husband?'

'Why, we're both 35,' she responded breathlessly.
'No Kidding,' he said. 'Thirty-five years old and both of you still
believe in genies?'

 

Why must you do this?

 

You are so astoundingly original. :/gasp:

 

You take up half the spamzone with these ****ing things.

 

Wait... I have something in my pocket for you

 

I find knock knock jokes more entertaining.

 

I think I have a couple left, here:

 

I just asked you a question, and you do that to me?

Wow, I hate to see you as an old man.

 

The maturity in this thread blows me away.

 

Hmmm... let's see what I got in my other pocket

I ain't forgetting you man

 

Oh boi it sure is Gentlemen in here.


Guys if you don't like it then don't post, if you are only posting to ***** and complain then go away.

As for you Toshi, don't retaliate.

 

Toshi. Enough. :/

 

What did I do!!!!!

 

Don't forget the others.

Don't bother replying to people when they piss you off, it gives a reaction and continues an argument.

 

So that's what retaliate means... Thanks for the info

 

Geez. Can't people just let a guy tell jokes in peace?

 

That's what I'm trying to make them understand. But they won't think!