Did you guys hear that NASA is spying on our phones?

Probably gonna try to build spaceships with em or somethin'

 

good thing i dont have anyone to talk to

 

Okay Wilson try and keep your tears in check I don't want to drown here.

Did you hear they're resurrecting mammoths? Maybe we'll ride those b*tches to work one day.

 

What the hell man

I dont get this ****

why can freaking NASA spy on us

but we cant ****ing spy on NASA

I call bullshit.

I want our computers and **** to be wired to THEIR **** so we can spy on them.

Full circle.

 

That's kinda funny because my family just found out that my uncle is spying on his wife and kids' cell phones too. Does that mean that my uncle is NASA?

 

Actually, it's the NSA. There's no A after the N, because those are two different Federal Institutions. NASA goes to space, and the NSA stands for "National Security Agency, while NASA stands for National Aeronautics and Space Administration. So, again, the NSA is spying, while NASA goes to space.

Hold on, speaking of NASA, I just got an e-mail directly from them! Oh Em Gee! This is incredible! They sent me something they found in space that circled around us a few times! Apparently, it was back in 2002. I can't believe what I'm seeing!

Spoiler: From NASA

 

i think you mean SATAN

 

I'm not trying to imply that it's Aliens... but...

Aliens.

 

The National Aeronautics Space Aliens?

 

NASA, stop wasting and get a moon colony already.

 

@NASA: send my selfies into space

 

Stellar pun, dude.

 

Wait, second thought here... Selfies? does this mean that Aliens have seen my junk? I keep a pretty messy room and I send pictures to other people to help me motivate myself to clean it up, so, yeah, I'm pretty sure Aliens have seen my junk.

 

The last thing we need is for Neptunians to start worshiping you

 

It would probably take awhile for the information to reach Neptune. Worry about the inner planets first.

 

shit, dude. fuck. damn.