Could you date someone who your family/friends didn't approve of?

Of course. It's what you feel in your heart that matter.
What I say is that you should at least listen to what your family has to say. Then make your choice.
But you should be free to decide for yourself.​

 

depends but if i really like her then yeah
its my life not theirs

 

I would date someone regardless of whatever my friends/family think. They shouldn't CARE, they're not the ones in the reletionship. Well, my family wouldn't really care,as long as he eats the food they make,he will be liked!

 

I don't really care if my parents or friends approve, except a few select few friends because they're pretty smart and stuff.

 

Yes. I could and I would.
I don't give a damn of what others think as long as I have true feelings for him. If they don't like my man, they can gtfo.

 

Lol at my old response to this thread. I've changed my mind since then.

While I would still date a girl despite what anyone says if I liked her that much, I like to think that I would still listen to them.
I mean, parents have been there before. Not just in relationships, but life in general and we all take that for granted and think "stfu, you're old, you don't know what things are like these days. YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE MY AGE." Hell, my mom has very negative thoughts about relationships, flat out telling me "don't fall in love, you'll only suffer." But for a specific girl? Yeah, I'd listen to her.
Same for my friends, maybe they know something about her that I don't.

However, sometimes these reasons are really messed up. When my girlfriend and I started dating, a couple of my friends actually told me I shouldn't date her because she wouldn't have sex with me since she's waiting for marriage. Fortunately, I"m waiting, too (Not for marriage, though, I'm not that patient). But I find something like that to be a stupid reason.


But I've also been on the other side of it. My friend broke up with his girlfriend of two years and soon-to-be fiance for a girl he had met a few days ago. This girl is a very sweet person, but she's also...well, a whore. She even admitted it to him and she knows it. Granted, his fiance wasn't the best girlfriend ever, hell, I told him long ago it wouldn't work out (considering they cheat on each other), but leaving her for someone he had just met who everyone told him likes to sleep around? He didn't listen. What happened over her fall break? She went to stay with some other guy and had sex.
In other words, sometimes, even if you still do date that person, you should still listen to others.

 

Holy crap, thanks, past-me. I honestly didn't know that.


Anyway, my response to this thread: Yes, very easily. In fact, I wouldn't even bother telling them unless it proved to be advantageous for me. I wouldn't tell my sister, because her viewpoint is inferior to my own, as she is younger, and has nothing to do with the decision. My father would not interfere, provided it didn't interfere with school-work. The only person who would disapprove of it would be my mother, because she plays the devil's advocate. As she's already taught me to think cynically, I have no reason to need her opinion, so naturally I wouldn't tell her.

Telling them would only create trouble for me, be it through snide remarks, active opposition, or simply having to discuss it with them. For example, if the relationship doesn't work out, I'd rather not have to explain the circumstances, or endure misguided sympathy. There's a good chance they'd try to provide advice, which I'd prefer to figure out on my own. I want to live my own life, not one guided by them.

I stopped caring about acknowledgement from them a while ago, around the point in time my mother told me that online friendships aren't real. I disagreed with her then, and I don't think it would be any different for an online romance. I've decided that I only need my own approval, not anyone else's.

So could I, and would I, date someone who my family didn't approve of? Yeah, without a second thought. I'd take it one step further, and deny them the opportunity to disapprove.

Friends are a slightly different issue, really. However if they're unable to deal with someone I like, then that's their problem, not mine. I wouldn't stop being friends with someone because another friend disliked them, and the same goes for a girlfriend. I've already got this situation in my social circle, where some friends dislike others. I just take a neutral standpoint, and attempt to diffuse the situation. I still remain friends with both of them. If a friend refuses to talk to me unless I stop seeing someone, then that's their decision, but I won't let it impact my actions. If a girlfriend were to try to get me to stop meeting friends, then I'd take the same stance with them. Besides, if they're the sort of person who demands I break off contact with friends of mine, we're probably ill-suited as a couple.

In all of these situations, I'm assuming that I'm making a sensible decision, and the disapprovals are on subjective grounds. If I happen to be dating a meth-user, for example, then their disapproval may hold some weight. However that's a situation I'd avoid. On the other hand, I may decide I like someone online. I consider that perfectly reasonable, but others may disagree. In this case, I discard their opinions, as I've already assessed the situation and decided that I'm happy to deal with it.

I liked past-me's post better.

 

Already being the black sheep in my family, I would be forced to date someone that they did not like, in order for me to like them at all. They would try to set me up with someone who they think would bring me around to their way of thinking. Anyone else would not do for them. Needless to say, I would comply with that, and my own lover would have to share a good deal of my views, or else we would not get along well at all...

 

Just replying to the initial question of this thread; yes, yes I could. Without a doubt they have no control over my personal life. Nor would they have control over anyone's personal life...That's my opinion on it at least.

 

To be honest, I wouldn't care about what others think about my date. I already have quite strange turn-ons. (I like scras, FYI) So I think it would only be natural for my friends to be... I dunno... Repulsive towards my date. If they don't respect my choices, they don't deserve my friendship. Same with family, altough I don't see that happen as much as friends being... Annoying about my date. I dunno why...

 

Well, if I liked the guy and he treated me well, then it probably wouldn't really matter what anyone else thought. I would take close friends and family's opinions into consideration if they thought the guy was hurting me, or that kind of stuff, but none of those people would get to decide over my relationships, as it's my life and desicion.

Oh and also:

Though never directly stated, it was just unacceptable for Romeo and Juliet to see each other due to their families long history of being enemies. It's not something they should NEED to be told, it was something that had been made perfectly clear to them all their lives. Like a lot of Shakespare's plays you have to read between the lines or understand the true meaning to things that may seem superficial at first. Romeo and Juliet is no exception.

 

Because I can hold my own against mom and dad any time I want to, I would date someone they didn't approve of, in front of them or behind their backs, I don't really care. I've done it a few time before - once resulting in my butt getting kicked out of the house, but it was nothing.

My friends are my friends, they're not family and they're not my mommy and daddy, so their opinion matters ever less than that of mom and dad. It they say that he's a bad influence on me and he'll just get me into trouble, then I'll just learn that by myself, first hand.

 

If I was in love with the person yeah.
My father left my mum before I was born because his parents didn't approve. So I just wouldn't let my parents interfere with my relationship partly because I don't want to resemble my father either... but that's just me lol