Cintrus? Where's the marriage?

Discussion in 'The Spam Zone' started by kitty_mckechnie, Aug 24, 2008.

  1. kitty_mckechnie I want to hug you like big fuzzy Siberian bear!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2007
    2,230
    Right here! =D

    Note: This isn't an actual marriage, dafties. xD

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    Orange - …n’ that’s how an orange gives birth.

    Cin - You never cease to amaze me. You’re so informative and not just with oranges…it’s one of the reasons I like you.

    Orange - You like me? *blushes*

    Cin - Not at first. You came across as a little noobette that desperately wanted to be notice. Not now, though. I never liked oranges till I got to know you. Every time I see the colour orange I think of you. I’m hooked on the stuff…and you.

    Orange - I…I’ve always liked you, Cin, even when I thought you were a lass. You were so smart n‘ pink.

    Cin - For you, I wouldn’t hesitate to have me lower regions removed. *grabs Orange by the waist*

    Orange - Ruff! Hurr hurr.

    Cin - Your eyes are like shooting stars…

    Orange - …n’ yours look like they have been photoshopped.

    Cin - Lets not suppress these feelings anymore. *kisses Orange*


    Cin and Orange fall to the ground for a night of interweb passion.


    Misty - Got any 7s?

    Katy Perry - No, but I have 69. *hint hint, wink wink*

    Misty - The cards don’t go up to 69. What are you talking about?

    Katy Perry - *creeps up to Misty* Shall I show you?


    Orange bursts through the door.



    Orange - Best. Nite. Eva.

    Katy - U kissed a gurl?

    Orange - Better. I kissed Cin.

    Katy - That’s not better.

    Misty - Where did you kiss him?

    Orange - In Meebo

    Misty - Where is your meebo? *tilts head*

    Orange - That isn’t half of it…we’re engaged n’ I’ve come to ask that if you two, my best friends here on khv would be my bridesmaids.

    Misty/ Katy - OF COURSE!

    Misty - ..eh, will the bridesmaid dress be orange?

    Orange - Of course not. The bridesmaid dress shall be pink. My wedding dress shall be orange. *shows picture of wedding dress* Sexy!

    Katy - HAWT PINK!?!?!

    Orange - Aye. I learned that teal is an ugly colour the hard way. *rubs face*

    Misty - When are you getting married?

    Orange - In roughly an hours time.

    Misty - How will you send out the invitations in such a short period of time?

    Orange - Cin dealt with that. Everyone knows men take less than a minute to prepare ‘emselves. Woman take considerably longer. That’s why Cin gave me these time wrist bands that slow down time. We better get dressed. I’m goin’ to wear neon orange nail polish.

    Katy - Have you told your mom you’re getting’ married?

    Orange - No…


    A conversation with Cin and TCO several moment ago.


    Cin - I need you to contact everyone at khv and invite them to Orange’s and my wedding.

    TCO - Why me?

    Cin - You know a lot of people here and word will spread quick if you inform other members. I’ll make it worth your while.

    TCO - Oh?

    Cin - I know you like rep.

    TCO - We’re not meant to talk about rep. *sweating, shifty eyes.*

    Cin - I know you still crave for it. I give a fairly large number of points.

    TCO - The rep system was just altered, you’ll give a lot less now.

    Cin - I bet CtR gives quite a lot. I can make her give you some.

    TCO - Rep…from CtR!?!?! I’ll do it.

    Cin - Good! Tell everyone to be in the spam zone at midnight. I need to find a best man.


    Word spreads quick at khv.


    In the spam zone with a full house.



    ICSP - Another forum wedding? Aren’t these banned?

    Pyrɸ - Ever since Sara left everyone ignored her old fashioned ways.

    ICSP - They did that anyway.

    Pyrɸ - but she could give them into trouble…then ramble on.

    ICSP - *shivers* I know. Her rambles are endless. You see this ear? *points to left ear* It’s fake. Sara talked till it fell off.


    Tootsie - You think there will be tootsies rolls at the snack table? Or will it just be coo-

    DPWolf - SHHHHH! Don’t say the c word. Remember what happened at Rosey’s wedding? RvR clubbed a noob.

    Tootsie - RvR isn’t here. I shall take it upon myself guard the snack table! *makes rounds in the spam zone*

    サキ アマミヤ- I think I’ll go cook…

    Tootsie - SOMEONE WAS ABOUT TO SAY THE C WORD! *smashes サキ アマミヤ‘s head off the pew in front* WHO ELSE WANTS A PIECE OF TOOTSIE!?!?!

    Congregation - *silence, eyes forward*

    Rosey - *Whispers* Where are the admins? They said they were going to be here…


    The spam zone door bursts open, singing and cheering booming from the other side.


    Pina Colada (CtR) - Now what are the joys of a single young man? Why, boozing, bloody well boozing.

    Strongbow (DA)- And what is he doing whenever he can? Why, boozing, bloody well boozing.

    JD and Coke (Neku) -You may think I’m wrong or you may think I’m right. I’m not going to argue, I know you can fight.

    Dry Martini (RvR) - But what do you think we are doing tonight? Why, boozing, bloody well boozing.

    Absinthe (Xaldin) - *Singing to a coat stand* Boozing, boozing, just you and I. Boozing, boozing, when we are dry. Some do it openly, some on the sly. And we all are bloody well boozing.


    Rosey - CtR, sis! Why did you get drunk…again?

    Pina Colada - CtR? Nono. I’m the ever so sexy Pina Colada, the fabulous. *hiccup*

    Rosey - DA…

    Strongbow - No. I shot DA with my bow… in my mind. I’m the strong winded one. *barfs*

    Absinthe - WHO AM I?!?! …Why hello there pretty thing. *makes out with coat stand*


    JD and Coke - Where are the women? I must mate.

    Sarah - Over here big boy. *wink*

    JD and Coke - You’re not a woman. Come, Dry Martini. To the staff section! *picks Dry Martini in his arms and takes him to the Staff section which looks exactly like a closet*


    In the kitchen


    Shades - This has to be the worst wedding menu I’ve ever seen. Everything is made out of oranges. Orange wedding cake, orange turkey, orange salmon, orange ratatouille… orange wine? How did she manage that? Worse of all, an orange chocolate fountain. *shivers*

    The Joker - What’s wrong with an orange chocolate fountain?

    Shades - I had…an accident on my first day on the job at a wedding. I’ll never forget what that little girl did to me.

    The Joker - What happened…OMG! Have you seen what Rosey is wearing? She’s so cute!

    Shades - Have you seen what Amber is wearing? No matter what era it is. A multi coloured, puffy dress isn’t fashionable.

    The Joker - Oh I know. Someone call the fashion police on her.

    Shades - *tips a bottle of rum into bowl of dough*

    The Joker - What was that?

    Shades - Rum. It’s my way of dealing with weddings, especially with everything being orange. Don’t worry, this is just for me.

    The Joker - That was a whole bottle, though.

    Shades - I like rum.


    Back in the Spam zone congregation.


    TCO - Mostly everyone is here. Only a few are missing; Kitty, Sammy and Ghetto.

    Alex - I’m surprised they never showed up, especially Kitty and Ghetto. Kitty is her mom after all and Ghetto has known her for a long time.

    TCO - I was told specifically not let Kitty find out.

    Alex - Why not? And Ghetto?

    TCO - They didn’t say. Ghetto took the news hard. He locked himself in his UNs, blasting out Lil Wayne. No one has seen him.

    Alex - We only found out an hour ago about this wedding.

    TCO - It’s still unusual for him not to be prying on the members. I’ve caught him a few times at my window while I’m in the shower.


    Cin walks up to the spam alter followed by LullabyCaiden and Darky


    LC - May we please have silence till the bride arrives.

    Cin - *whispers* I’m nervous. I’m just about to marry the girl I love.

    Darky - Is it because of Roxas?

    Cin - No. That was a long time ago. I was young and naïve. I didn’t know what I was getting into.

    Darky - Do you still sleep with that life size cardboard cut out of him?

    Cin - I never had one…

    Darky - *cough* Neither did I…*shuffles feet*

    Cin - Where’s Trigger?

    Darky - He’s sitting in the middle next to Jube. He’s mad that I couldn’t sit with him. *waves flirtatiously at trigger*

    Trigger - *gives Darky the finger*

    Darky - *sigh* I’ll have to work my magic tonight.


    Poppin’ Champagne starts playing on a small stereo system.


    The congregation turns as Orange walks in with her “fabulously” bright dress.



    Amber - Pfff, my dress is better. Lots of colours are better than one.

    RoxasSora2010 - ARRRRRGH! MY EYES! THEY BURN!

    Pika_power - It’s so bright. *suffers from seizure, foam at the mouth*


    Orange walks up to the alter with Katy and Misty tossing oranges into the congregation.


    VGN - Oranges? This wedding is weak compared to my wedding.

    Rosey - Oh yes. The one where you kidnapped the dollar I sent RvR.

    VGN - It was just to capture your lov-. *killed with an orange through the head, splashing Rosey*

    Rosey - Great. You can pay for the dry cleaners bill. *takes VGN wallet*



    Several other members died from flying oranges. Absol, gintasthebest, Goimez and Xidon were some of the few to perish.


    Shades - Help me bring these bodies into the kitchen, Joker.

    Joker - Hotdogs?

    Shades - Better than what we are already serving.

    Orange - I WANT ORANGE ADDED TO THOSE!!!

    Shades - Damn. *drags bloody bodies*


    Load hacking noises originate from the kitchen.


    DSK - I’m not dead!

    Shades - Damn gas build up. *hacks at DSK*

    DSK - I NEVER KNEW LOOOOOOOOOOVE…


    Shades - *sits in the back of the spam zone. Sucking on a rum ball*


    LC - Are we ready to begin?

    Cin - Yes.

    Orange - Aye.

    LC - We are gathered here today to witness the forum marriage of Cin and Orange. Together they shall be known as Cintrus. Cin, do you take Orange as your internet wife, to have and to virtually hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer in rep, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish until virtual death do you part?

    Cin - I do.

    LC - Same to you Orange.

    Orange - I do-

    Risk - LIFE IS SO UNFAIR! I JUST LOST PREMIUM FOR THE TENTH TIME!!! *sob*

    LC - *jumps from the alter.* Risk…*huggies* I feel your pain. Losing premium is like losing your identity. It is who you are. But don’t despair. We still love you. *more huggies*

    Risk - LullabyCaiden, I…

    Vivi - Stop being such an emo, Risk.

    Risk - I’M NOT AN EMO!

    Vivi - Please, don’t cut your wrists. *rolls eyes*

    Risk - *runs off to the bathroom*

    LC - Vivi, that was unnecessary.

    Vivi - It’s ok. It’s our thing.

    Orange - Can we please continue with this?

    LC - Sorry. *hops back up the alter* Orange?

    Orange - I do.

    LC - If anyone has reason why these two shouldn’t wed please speak up now.

    Congregation - OBJECTION!

    Split - I THOUGHT WE HAD SUMTHIN SPESHIL!!!

    Crono - Needs more me. CronoxOrangexCin!

    Strongbow - Who stole my drink!?!?

    TCO - This can’t be real!

    Laurence_Fox - The timing is too perfect. The khv user awards have begun and the cutest couple is included this year. Set up if I ever did see one.

    Tummer - Guys, can’t you see the love in their eyes?

    Misty - STFU, Tummer. *bans*

    Katy - Tootsie x Katy Perry x Split x Ghetto 4.eva!

    Tootsie - HURR HURR!

    What? - *reads card with orange writing* I agree. It’s evident that this is true love and not an attempt to steal the award for cutest couple from users like Darky and SabbyMuffin.

    Sabby - I knew it! You’re both just after my award!

    Orange - No, we’re really in love. Why don’t you believe us?

    Darky - Sabby, we don’t need an award to let others know of our love…

    Trigger - YOU SON OF A- *tosses pew at Darky*


    A brawl breaks out between the Cintrus fans and the rest of the members.


    Coco - *taking shelter behind pot* This will make a splendid picture. *draws* Needs more red.

    Orange - They’ve ruined our wedding! *weeps*

    Cin - Orange…*holds tight*

    Orange - Cin…

    Deep voice - EVERYONE STOP!


    The congregation came to a halt. Vivi tossing one last punch into Rawr.


    Orange - Ghetto?

    Ghetto - *Breaks through the glass roof* Glub glub! Glub glub! Glub glub! Glub glub! Glub glub! *scuba dives down*

    Reptar - Oh no! Watch out for the poisonous fugu fish!

    Ghetto - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! FUUUUUGU! *falls to the ground*

    Cin - Will these intrusions end?

    Katy - I say we tie him up. Let me deal with him.

    Tootsie - I want to help!

    Ghetto - STOP! Nobody move! I’m wired!!! *removes shirt revealing bombs*

    Katy - Can I touch your abs?

    Girly - Can I touch your p-

    Ghetto - SILENCE!

    Cin - Ghetto, what you’re doing is insane. There is no justification…

    Ghetto - I TOLD YOU ALL TO SHUT UP! ONE MORE WORD AND I BLOW UP THE FORUM!

    Absinthe - Hah! Been there, done that.

    Pina Colada - That’s why you’re not allowed in the admin CP anymore, sweetie.

    Repliku - CtR…

    Pina Colada - It’s Pina Colada. *hiccup*

    Repliku - Ummm, Pina Colada. Can you take this chastity belt off. I desperately need to relieve myself.

    Pina Colada - Well, it has been 5 days. The key is hidden where no one can get it.

    JD and Coke - *thrusts hand in Pina Colada’s cleavage* I feel something, I feel something…OUCH! *removes hand*

    DPWolf - No one feels around my master. *appears out of Pina Colada’s top* GRRRRRRRR!

    Strongbow - Lucky dog. What I would do if I were allowed near a woman.* drinks a pint*

    JD and Coke - You have me.

    Strongbow - I know, babes.

    Ghetto - SHUUUUUUUUUUT UUP!

    Orange - What’s wrong with you?

    Ghetto - This isn’t meant to be. It’s meant to be me…you’re meant to be with me! Ever since the moment I first laid eyes on a post of yours I knew we were meant to be. Every conversation we had was special to me. Why didn’t you want to marry me? I LOVE YOU!?!?

    Orange - …I like you, Ghetto, I really do, but not in the same way you think you love me.

    Ghetto - Don’t flatter yourself, Orange. I was talking to Cin.

    Darky - PLOT TWIST!

    Orange - CIN!?!

    Cin - I am alluring to everyone.

    Ghetto - Please, Cin. Reconsider! Marry me instead!

    Cin - *sigh* I can’t. Orange is the one I truly love. This isn't for show or to win some meaningless award. Together we are Cintrus. We are inseparable. *holds Orange’s hand*

    Ghetto - I was afraid you would say that. If I can’t have you, then no one can. GOODBYE KHV!


    Members scream I horror as they rush to the door.


    Ghetto - It’s no use, the door is locked. We shall all die together.


    A thuderous bang comes from behind the door.


    Ghetto - WHAT THE-!

    Voice - RAAAAAAAAAAAWR! *kicks doors off hinges*


    The doors fly across the spam zone, hitting Ghetto and knocking him out cold.


    TCO - Yay, we’re saved!

    Misty - Orange, your mom is here.


    Kitty and Sammy stood at the doorway.


    Katy - She looks mad.

    Sammy - Kitty, you promised you wouldn’t get mad. Look what you did to the door.

    Kitty - ORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANGE! *storms into the aisle, tossing pews and members to the side*

    Cin - Orange, run. I’ll hold her back.

    Orange - No, Cin. She’s too powerful…

    Cin - Don’t worry, we’ll be together soon enough. *kisses Orange on the cheek* Now go.

    Orange - I love you…*runs towards the RP section* If I can make it in there I might stand a chance of seeing Cin again.

    Kitty - You can’t escape me, Orange!

    Cin - Kitty, please, be reasonable about this.

    Kitty - Hush up…*swats Cin into a wall*

    Orange - CIN! MOM, HOW COULD YOU!?

    Cin - O-orange, watch out…!

    Orange - Whaaa! *trips over Question Time thread* Damn it! I created you!

    Kitty - *picks Orange up*

    Orange - Mom, please! *cries*

    Kitty - We’ll talk ‘bout it when we get home. *tosses Orange over her shoulder*

    Orange - But I love him!!

    Kitty - You don’t know what you love. You’re still a wee bambino.

    Orange - I’m not!

    Kitty - Lets go, Sammy. You comin’ home, Coco?

    Coco -Yush! *scurries from behind pot* Oh waifu, I drew a picture today. Members fighting does well for a drawing.

    Orange - LET ME GO, MOMMY! *kicking and screaming*

    Kitty - Hurry up, Sammy.

    Sammy - I’m so sorry, Cin. She was just a little upset that her own daughter didn’t invite her to her wedding. *helps Cin onto a broken pew* I better go. See you later.*leaves with Kitty etc*


    The spam zone looked a lot messier than usual. Broken threads and battered members laid everywhere.


    Dry Marini - *walks in* WOOOOOOOOO! This place is a mess. What happened here?

    Darky - Members fighting, Ghetto threatening to blow us all up and Kitty passed by.

    Dry Martini - Nothing unusual then.

    Cin - I don’t get it. How did Kitty know? We sent her away with Sammy to play Zelda. She should’ve been gone for hours.

    Dry Martini - Ah, don't worry. I told her you were marrying Orange. *hiccup* No had informed her that her daughter was getting married. She took me into a closet for a few minutes before I passed out. Then I found myself a lone…


    Crono - What’s different?

    Darky - Buuuuurn! *high fives Crono*

    Dry Martini - Did she make it in time for the wedding?


    Entire congregation attacks Dry Martini.


    Shiki - *crawls up to Ghetto’s body* Fresh meat…hmm? That wire is in the wrong socket. *fixes wire*


    KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!



    The end
     
  2. Hissora ahurhurhur.

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2006
    Location:
    behind you :U
    139
    lolz
    cin's photoshopped eyes
    I so wanna make this into a comic ;D
     
  3. gerlert_fav2005 Traverse Town Homebody

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2006
    Location:
    Somewhere... I ish not telling you, Florida! XD
    14
    185
    XD So funny! Good thing I wasn't there! >> <<
     
  4. jojoj13 Hollow Bastion Committee

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2008
    201
    671
    heheheh.
    Noobette.

    ...
    I just actually pictured this story as an anime for some reason.
     
  5. JellyBeing ALL. THE. BUTTS.

    Joined:
    Mar 24, 2007
    132
    :,D

    Roflcopterlmao, I loved every second of it.
     
  6. SplitOverload Chaser

    Joined:
    Sep 30, 2006
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York, NY
    179
    Wow. I love this. Like...I haven't read something this good for a long time. Write moar and include me maorr thx
     
  7. Cin Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp

    Joined:
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    241
    I have to say, funniest line, "DAMNIT I CREATED YOU!"
     
  8. Trigger hewwo uwu

    Joined:
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    Male
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    Corridors of Time
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    XDDD

    That was awesome, kitty. :3
     
  9. Inasuma "pumpkin"

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Indigo Plateau
    277
    ... Cin's photoshopped eyes. lol

    Also, lol @ me and trig. XD
     
  10. O R A N G E C is the heavenly option

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2007
    Location:
    between an erupting earth and an exploding sky
    194
    Kitty I love you, officially.

    I lol'd at several parts, including Cin's eyes and Amber's dress, lmfao.
     
  11. Scarred Nobody Where is the justice?

    Joined:
    May 14, 2007
    Gender:
    Male
    1,359
    in the story, that is probably what i'd say...
     
  12. kitty_mckechnie I want to hug you like big fuzzy Siberian bear!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2007
    2,230
    You should. That's be awesome.

    Glad you all liked it. I got bored at work yesterday n' saw a woman buy an orange, which made me think of orange, which made me think of Cin which made me ...blah blah. You get it.

    Otherwise, it was awright? =D

    Well, Cin's eyes do look incredibly green. They must be photoshopped.
     
  13. Tootsie coquí

    Joined:
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    Gender:
    Female
    268
    Photoshopped eyes lmao XD;; and I loved how you attacked orangey lul.

    That snack table is all mine to protect :B A nom nom
     
  14. kitty_mckechnie I want to hug you like big fuzzy Siberian bear!

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2007
    2,230
    That's the second time you've said that. *steps back* The love is too much!

    Eeheehee, glad you liked it. n__n


    I think Misty's reply was a quote that made me lol so hard. xD

    Orange should've at least got her mum's consent.

    N' of course, Snarf. You would never abandoned your duties n' feast at the snack table.
     
  15. Juicy Chaser

    Joined:
    May 29, 2008
    325
    that made my day lolz

    EPIC

    lmfao xD
     
  16. Luka Deafening silence

    Joined:
    May 25, 2007
    Location:
    °×~×°
    226
    was i really such a repwhore ? ;~;
    damnit i would so not do that xD
    that was good though
     
  17. RoxaSora2010 Nulla è reale. Tutto è lecito.

    Joined:
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    95
    Lolololol XD Good job! *Cleans eyes* Now they're okay...
    It took me a lot and kicked off boredom finally ^.^
     
  18. Doukuro Chaser

    Joined:
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    Female
    1,172
    Lmao

    It's been a long time since there was a funny story here xD
     
  19. GhettoXemnas literally dead inside

    Joined:
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    827
    I was quite disgusted when I appeared because I thought I would be all "OMG ORANGEZ NUU" but it was a nice twist. For the record though, I'm straight.
     
  20. Cin Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp Derp

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    Be thankful she didn't write it so we'd run off together.