Can we ever be just friends?

1. Yes
2. I don't think so, but I judge myself harshly.
3. In the past yes, even up until recently. But now, no.

I know they don't though. I've known them for a damn good part of my life, there's hardly any secrets between us. Besides, I've always been more of a tomboy, so they treat me like "one of the guys" more than anything, so...yeah.

 

It is possible for two opposite sexes to be friends! I have a friend and I'd never think about making a move on her! I'm so pure of all of it. 358 ;)

 

I never said I didn't lust after her. When we first met, I didn't have a crush on her, It was a physical attraction and a pretty strong one, I might add. However, our chances were extremely low. To me, she wasjust another Christian virgin good girl. To her, I was just a potheaded horn dog. That made her even more alluring, ya know? The whole forbidden aspect of her. And I tried flirting like crazy and got NOWHERE. AS time passed by, it became more than just a physical attraction, I started liking her more than I should have and thought about her as a potential girlfriend. And yet, I still wanted to, well...make angry but passionate and possibly rough love to her. We became really close and now my opinions changed. As gorgeous and sexy as she is, I don't really care if we ever have a physical relationship. Would I mind it? Not at all, but it's not important to me. Do I love her? OF course, but with no romantic strings attached. But she's not really like a sister to me, so its a weird bond. Like we're IN LOVE, but in a friend way.



As for the other thing, I have gotten really emotionally involved with one girl a couple years ago. ANother great looking girl. We were on a relationship roller coaster my whole junior year and stayed good friends for a long time. Now that was romantic feelings, but would I have dated her after the first few months? Not at all. I knew her too well and it wouldn't have worked out. So friends was as far as that could go, no matter how much we wanted that change, it just wouldn't be right.

 

When you want to make a point have "truth" in it, you state facts, not opinions according to your personal views. Opinions are fine and dandy, but they aren't definite, and much less when they sound so half-baked as your first post in the thread.

Keep that in mind.

Lies? I thought it was called self-control.

Most mature people can restrain their desires for the sake of a friendship. It's not really that hard either, all it takes is weighting the importance of certain things. So, it's pretty simple to say that a mature and lucid person can maintain emotions in check. Meanwhile, someone who isn't all that conscious of consequences might just be in it for the physical attraction.

 

I've got friends that are guys, and yeah you could use "perfect friends" to describe us, but I've never felt anything more for any of them, and I'm pretty sure they haven't for me. I've grown up with most of them, so I know all their faults and they know mine. Is that so bad? No, I don't think so.

LilBueno, your situation is roughly what's happened to two friends of mine. I don't think there as close as before.

 

Well, you've started to make me think about the difference between good friend and boy/girlfriend.
Now, this may only be my friends, since I guess not alot of friends may do this, but generally we are quite close with each emotionally and physically, not sexually though. Its just that we don't care if someone lays on our lap or holds our hand, whoever it may be. Also, we can tell each other everythnig, act stupid, be generous to each other, help out and all that. Compare that with what i've seen of loving couples, I can't see much difference except that they have sex.

Now, i'm not saying relationships are based purely on sex, but its really the only real difference between the two I can see.
So in answer to the Qusetion: Yeah, we can be with friends with either sex, because friendships are a lot like being a couple, we laugh and cry, share and bond, its all about how we treat each other

 

What about casual sex?

 

I still see casual sex as quite a seperate relationship. You're not in it with emotions, or long term commitment or as a couple.
You're their for the physical only.

Alot of relationships built on casual sex don't amount to a stable relationship. If you doing it for sex only, go for it.
But if want a real relationship with that person, be serious about it and don't let your groin do the thinking.

 

If one of the two is attracted to the other, then they may be too hurt to carry on with the friendship. If they are both attracted then probably not. However, if neither are attracted to the other then they can be the best of friends. And we'll know if we're attracted right? It just snaps.

So basically it's all an attraction thing. But this can vary to person to person, but that's what the stactics say.​

 

But who's to say that the attraction WILL get in the way? Is it not possible to be attracted to your best friend without having your feelings get in the way of the friendship?

 

I said it varies to person to person. Some people just can't do it. But that's not to say that a lot of people can. ​

 

Well, I have many close female friends, and I can honestly say I don't "Lust" after them. Usually I know them long enough that to think "that could be my kid sister, or sister" I'm just close to my friends enough that I wouldn't want to destroy anything if I did like them.

In the case of just friends, It could happen, two of my ex's were friends of mine. But it might not work out for many reasons.

 

Of course boy and girl can be forever friends. Well, usually it's the girl who easily got feelings for her opposite sex, but if the girl is quite tomboyish like me, they usually have lots of opposite sex friends both the same gender friends.

 

Yes. I don't get why people say they aren't. I have a friend of the opposite sex and we're pretty good friends.

 

Some of my absolute best friends are girls. I dunno what I'd do without them. I don't want to date them at all. I might want to bone a couple of 'em, but that's natural; they're hot. Some of 'em think I'm hot too. (Dunno where they got a crazy idea like that.) We just don't try it because neither of us has an interest.

I don't get why most people can't wrap their heads around this. Not most people in the thread, mind, just people in general. Y'all realize the only fundamental, reliable difference between men and women is the shape of their crotch? Even then, there's a couple screwballs in the crowd.

 

1. Yeah i think so. I actutally have a lot of female friends and a lot of them are pretty attractive actually. Out of experience i can say it's easily possible.

2. I stopped believing in perfect things. I don't think a perfect soulmate or a perfect friend exists for that matter. I can't actually explain how people fall in love but I don't believe that there is one person out there that's meant to be for someone.

 

Can guys and girls ever be just friends?

Of course they can.

And is there such a thing as the perfect best friend?

I think that there isn't such a thing as perfect as in perfect for all time, bt I do think you can have a perfect friend for that phase of your life. My best friend when I was in first school was a great friend for me at that time, but my best friend now is what I need in my life now. If that makes sense?

Though to be honest I don't really think I have one best friend, more I have a lot of really close friends.

Can the opposite sex be that perfect friend?

Most definitely. I see no reason why not, and to be honest I am closer friends with my guy friends than I am the majority of my female friends.

 

Hmm...
This factor pisses me off very much on how if a girl or a guy becomes friends with the opposite gender, they MUST have a crush on them or they're dating already.
I think guys and girls can just be friends if they wanted. I've got a lot of friends that are guys but I don't have a crush on any of them (except my boyfriend). But it's always when I become friends with a new guy, people automatically think I have the hots for them. -sighs-

 

It sounds cheesy, but I believe love should start with friendship. But yes, people can definitely be good friends if they are of the opposite sex. I used to have many friends who were girls. They were never as close as my guy friends, but good friends nonetheless.

 

I'll get my opinion out of the way and say it depends. There's a lot of factors that need to be put forth to actually establish the soulmate stage. That being the vision of a bright future lovewise and financially if the couple decides to get married.

It's hard not to try to love somebody, more than a friend mind you, when you are close such as a best friend and such. The feeling I persoanlly got was my feelings slowly creeping toward their direction.

With that being said, I guess it really depends who is willing to say "Hey, I think it's best if we are friends." You don't see much of that anymore. All you see now is, "Can't we at least be friends?" as an excuse that feel romance or ridiculous wanting.