Are you in love?

Since we're sort of on this subject...girls, are you okay if I order for you at a restaurant? That's also something I want.

 

Not choosing what you want for you, just knowing what you want and ordering it for you...that's something I would probably do even on a first date.

I ask this because I would think it fucking hot if a guy did that for me but I don't know about you girls.

 

...Would it be weird if i said yes because of a member on this site whom i've never actually met irl?

 

Unless I ask you to while I go to the bathroom, or if we'd been dating for years, no. I've got a lot of allergies, and I usually have to ask about ingredients before ordering anyways, and I like to try different things. Plus, at that point, it kinda feels like I'm having my autonomy stripped away, and independence is a big deal to me. I won't start yelling at a guy or anything like that, and I don't mind the little things, like opening car doors, holding the seat for me, etc, but at some point it starts to feel like you're taking away decisions from me.

But again, this is purely my perspective, and I'm sure you'll find as many girls who say that they won't mind it compared to the ones who say they do. Also, I'm totally not trying to say that what I described is your intention, it's just what it feels like to me personally
/has issues

 

So what if I am?

 

I think some of the younger fellas are too focused on having an ideal traditional man-woman relationship where the guy is the epitome of a gentleman and takes care of the girl like a child rather than an equally competent partner. There's a point where your desire to be the best guy takes away from the girl's chance to be...y'know, capable of anything?

I would love a gal who is ok with me doing some things for her, but also has the guts to say "Its fine dude lol" and can take care of things on her own too. Like, if either of us needed something, we could do it for each other, but we wouldn't completely rely on one of us for everything.

 

@Slaughter; If my date knew what I wanted. Though...I'm unpredictable, so it probably wouldn't work very well, if my date was guessing what I wanted, based off of 'knowing me well enough'. I tend to try something new each time I go out to eat, unless I'm not feeling too risky. xD; If we talked about it before hand and I mentioned to them that I was looking to get something and he ordered for me when the waiter came, then I'd be cool with that.

Otherwise, it would just result in an awkward moment if they said I'd be getting one thing, and I was actually planning on ordering something completely different. ​

 

Im stuck in that small margin of those whom like a girl, but arent 'In love'

 

No worries dude, you know I love you. <3








Y_Y

 

Been there too many times bro.

 

I've only been there once. But it hurts so bad.

Love you too honey. <3

 

Yeah, it doesn't get much easier in multiples either.

 

I'm single and while I've had 3 crushes, none have them have been enough for me to want to act on them. Just as well seeing as all of them were only in my life for a year or two. Though to be clear I was friends will each of them. No creeping in the background type deal.


As for the topic of spending. My family has been huge into guys taking the bill for generations. Down to the fact that the bills are taken out of my Dad's check before the incomes get merged just to make him feel good about it, seeing as it doesn't change anything in the long run. So, while I'm not at the level my dad or grandfather is, I will most definitely look to pay for dates and such. Hell even outside of a dating relation ship I like to pay for a bunch of stuff among friends. But if they want to pay for something, or I can't pay for it, then there is no shame in letting someone else take out the cash.


And ordering food, I would find rather creepy and controlling to do it while she is sitting there. If she got up to use the bathroom when the waiter came and you know what she likes then I think it would be sweet, but pray you got something she likes because that can go down hill fast if you get it wrong. Though like everything it depends on who you're with. Obviously just like you like the idea there are likely girls that would agree with that. So it's a gamble for sure, but it can pay off. And it might have better odds than I think.

 

Whoa, I don't love you like that. I-I think we need to take a little break.

I didn't think so. But at least I have my fantasies, and she seems to be alright with that.

 

Sometimes it seems like it, sometimes it doesn't, it's difficult to tell. There are a lot of factors that come into it too, which frustrates me to no abounds. I've been told females find me attractive irl, but i just can't see it. Don't really have a determination to BE attractive irl either. If something happens, it happens.

 

If sometimes it doesnt feel like it then it isn't true, not a switch that goes on and off, you know when you are.

 

I don't think that statement is entirely true in itself. I'm not sure about the feelings, sure, but there are times when people are argue and one of them just wants to completely destroy the other, but they still care for one another.