alone

'-'

Wow long ass time no post in this section except for contest threads @_@

Anyways, I think the last time I actually posted something of my own was in 2007 O_O;

So have this <3

Let me know what you think yah.


You use the prettiest words
And you have the sweetest smile
Eyes that hold me trapped here
I believed in you once
Once upon a time
In a place where fairytales were real
And magic was an everyday occurrence
In that time and in that place
I would believe ever whispered word
Every simple promise
Every little dream
But fairytales finish
Dreams will always end
Lies are spoken
Hearts are broken
And everything fades
Nothing lasts forever
I never realised the irony of such a statement
Nothing is all I feel now
And forever is a long time
You used the prettiest words
The softest sounds to break my heart
Eyes that held smiles
Hold only tears
Its time to wake up



​

 

Is so beautiful sweetie *huggles* Great flow, wonderful rythem...

 

That was gorgeous <3
Maybe I like it so much because it applies to me so much..

Nice repitition of "the prettiest words" :3
Read the line after "every simple promise" though.. you might need to make a tiny correction.

Its very good though (:

 

Thanks sissy <3

Thanks <3

xD; I see it, thanks, I didn't even notice that >.<


I was so nervous posting it because I never post my own stuff anymore o_o;


​

 

You have a gorgeous way with words Kay. The flow is spot on, and you flood this piece with emotion.

I love it.

 

this is really, nice

i can barely tell a whole story with poems.

and this feels so lighthearted but sad at the same time.

i liked the repetition too.

 

This is a very well-written piece with an amazingly evolving tone. It takes a lot of talent to make a poem start off as heart-warming and end as heart-wrenching, but you managed to do it quite well.
Love the flow too (although one or two lines seem a tad too long, but nothing bothersome at all). You're a great poet, I see.

 

d('~')b

Second night running D: though this one is a lot worse.

Whatevs, I am remembering how much I love actually sharing stuff even when it is **** <3

I'll cry these last tears
And I will go down fighting
Because I am so sick
Of always hurting
When you treat me like a child
And tell me I’m always wrong
This time I won’t listen
This time I will be strong
You never noticed, you could never see
That I gave up the world
I gave everything until there was nothing left
All that is left is that final piece
These last few tears and you are out of my system
No more heart ache and no more prison
I’m taking back my mind
I’m taking back my heart
You only ever hurt them
But you can’t hurt what you don’t have
I’m taking back myself
So Ill cry these last few tears
I’ll wipe them away
I'll hold my head high
There’s nothing more to say
You're always sorry
But this time I wont come back
I guess…
This… is
Goodbye

​

 

this is awesome.

the rhyme and rhythim are great.

and the feelings are really strong in this poem.

 

heh thanks xD;

But since you are the one who made me post it, you have to like it =P​

 

Very powerful poem. 10/5

 

I love this poem. Great job!

 

You know how I saw it! A very good poem with the ability to express and evoke emotion, and a brilliant ending. Keep up the good work!

 

great poem, but did you edit the ending from yesterday? It feels different...could be the center alignment.