A new poem : The apologie

Discussion in 'Archives' started by Kairi9020, Dec 1, 2007.

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  1. Kairi9020 Traverse Town Homebody

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    I wish a simple smile could make you love me again
    I wish a simple breath could wake me up again
    I wish the bright lights will never fade
    I wish I could open my eyes
    I wish I could awaken from this deep slumber
    I wish I could simplify this, clarify it
    I wish again and again

    I want to go back in time and finally surrender
    I could apologize
    Maybe, I'll actually practice and become a better person
    I want to be, no, I need to be perfect
    You're depending on me

    I have to learn stop wishing, to stop dreaming
    I have to learn
    There's no excuse for these hateful feelings
    I don't like to beg
    But if I have to,
    I'll get on my knees and cry
    I'll cry because I made the mistake

    I know you'll turn your head away
    I know you'll let it get to me
    I know I'll keep begging
    And even if you noticed the saddness in my eyes
    You'll also know there's no way to forgive a mistake like mine

    A small infatuation held me back
    This music that goes on for all eternity
    Without an ending
    Lands, skies, oceans...They all disappeared
    The friendships I've made, the loves I've found
    They are all lost in the distance
    So now, I walk this empty valley on my own

    Without wanting to
    I let it go
    I let it all go​


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    Just another poem I wrote....I"m not sure if it's very good though..
     
  2. Laplace TSUKI NO SHIHAI

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    I don´t like too much, because is kinda depressing for my current mood, but good I should say.
     
  3. Last of the Organization Twilight Town Denizen

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    It has a good length to it.....good free verse......but a little depressing atmosphere.....overall it was good though......
     
  4. Kairi9020 Traverse Town Homebody

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    It was ment to be depressing...:rolleyes:
     
  5. Nymph of Destiny Chaser

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    Wow...that was awesome Kairi! *claps* Really, it was awesome!! Although you accidentally misspelled 'apology' in the title, everything is really great! XD
     
  6. Crumpet In your shadow, I can shine!

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    nymph.... always picking up spelling errors

    wow .. it was very nice *claps*
     
  7. Jordier0xs0x King's Apprentice

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    That was good. Were you In a depressing mood when you wrote that? >.>
     
  8. Hakurei Reimu Take my hand. And then I'll fly with you right up

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    The way u executed the poem to match its topic-brilliant. This is great work.
     
  9. Valium Hollow Bastion Committee

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    I love it its really deep
     
  10. O R A N G E C is the heavenly option

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    It's a good poem, but it is very depressing. It makes me feel like huggling j00 to make you feel better. XD

    That sounded creepier than I wanted it to.

    Anyway, good job.

     
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