Is there a sizable difference between your actual personality and how you envision/want yourself to be? What does "being oneself" mean to you? If a person isn't just behaving on instinct, are they "wearing a mask" or something similar? Is it better or worse/more or less sincere for someone to try and act a certain way, as opposed to just letting their emotions run wild?
Personality? Not really. There are things in my personality I'd like to see changed (pride being nr. 1) but I'm content of my behaviour and personality overall. Skills, intelligence and all those attributes...Now that's another story. This phrase is often used in a silly context. People think that you aren't being yourself when your thoughts and actions differ. An example of this would be holding tears back in order to not show anyone that you want to cry. I disagree. The will to hold said tears back is just another aspect of one's personality, so in truth that person is being him/herself. There are situations however in which you are forbidden, dissuaded or unable to express certain aspects of your personality, but I think that doesn't limit "being oneself" as much as it limits "showing oneself". I believe the answer to this lies in another question: is it even possible to "turn off" your instincts completely? Maybe a personality is little more than a method of carrying out one's instincts. In which case we shouldn't speak of a mask but rather a face. Ask 1000 people whey they don't act upon their emotions and you may get answers that are based on emotions themselves, whether they be pride or compassion or whatever. See the example with the tears above. That being said, in this case I'll narrow these emotions down to primitive emotions or even just urges. Yes, it can be argued that this is less sincere to the outside world (see also: "showing oneself" above). However I think sincerity is a bargain price to pay for what we get in return. I for one would rather be insincere than irrational, egotistical and last but not least: predictable.
Kinda agree with Styx about most of this. I 'like' my personality the way it is. I don't like my instinctive nature to 'do good' in a way, nor do I like my introvert nature when people ask me about myself, and the constant and relentless inability to control when I lie, it's really not helping my life. Also, the constant questions that I keep asking myself is another point I wish to change about myself. I wonder if I really am acting like myself, if I’m acting to be something I’m not just to fit in, do I really express my emotions, do I fake those emotions, are my actions an extension of my thoughts and beliefs? If I could stop all that mental process I may live a peaceful life, and enjoy it! 'Wearing a mask' isn't a bad thing. It's part of our instinct to survive. The social conformity that we experience is part of who we are. If we agree with the majority, we are kept safe, warm and docile from questioning the majority. Concerning emotions, a lot of people aren't tugged by primal nature instincts anymore. I'm not sure if that's part of evolution or from being socialised, but the fact remains that in a modern day setting we must discipline ourselves otherwise we get no respect, prospects or attention. Most sociopaths run off their base emotions. And we know that path is usually a bad one. However many teens feel the same way, I know I did and still kinda do. I'd love to let my inhibitions run wild. But it's just not something that I truly want to do. You get use to it, or you end up like me, which is the less appealing result!
In my opinion, you're aways being yourself, unless others are ordering you to act like you do, and you cannot express your will at all. And it depends on the subject when you're being sincere, like, i usually tell the truth about everything, and aways act like i think i should, but i know that acting that way will affect someone in any serious aspect they wouln't want to, i tend to lie/don't act the way i want, unless i fell like it's necessary to do that in order for them to realize that they shouldn't do something, or that what they did was wrong.
like with a lot of things, i think it's just a matter of having the right balance of being yourself and being insincere. i like to think of how i represent myself as "being myself......but with some restraint". that's kind of how i can be myself but without letting my emotions dictate my every action (and of course hiding some things that i wouldn't want others to know). of course, we all act somewhat insincere in order to put off a different image or to fit in with others which i think is fine..... as long as you don't lose sight of yourself and become a mindless poser who only does what they do just for the sake of fitting in. so, to sum up my thoughts, i think "wearing a mask" is ok as long as a person knows where to draw the line.
Okay, well, it's not really that simple. There are many habits we would like to change, and be better people. I don't really feel the need to change my personality, unless it somehow disrupts the harmony(which most of the time does.) And, either way I just can't be too bothered to do it. I like my personality, but as Styx said...skills and Ect. Those are another subject. I believe that being myself is simply What I do, What I wish to do, and What others think I do. It makes some sense if you think about it. Side-note: Mvalentine, I fixed your post intentionally. Now, I'd advice that you at least use periods. With the periods, we'll at least understand when the sentence will stop, and we can grasp your meaning better.
I am happy with who I am. I like my personality, and a number of others seem to like it to. I don't want to change who I am, but yet I have people I look up to. Sometimes I'll imagine kicking someone in the nards because they're being a jerk, but I won't actually do it. I don't want to be known as a violent person, because I'm not. Sometimes I'll keep some emotions to myself, but it's because I don't want my friends to worry and make a fuss over me. Is that hiding who I am? Or is it a part of my personality?
