Well, I have a pretty crappy decision to make.

Well, as I've said before, life at home isn't all happy and full of flowers. I get blamed for ridiculous things, nobody treats me with respect and everybody turns to me if they want to have a *****. I have decided I want to move onto campus as a result, but the only thing standing in my way, is my mum.

I'm still clueless as to why she left my dad two years ago. Apparently I'm not reliable enough to know, not that I had to keep their break up a secret for six months and nearly losing most of my friends in the process. One can guess though, and my thoughts sit on something obvious. She's now having trouble with the bills and her life is apparently crap. I currently get Youth Allowence which is a government funded program which assists students in low income families, (under my mums name, my dad's doing fine) however, because I'm not eighteen, I can't control where it goes to and it goes to my mum. I need the money for University at the moment, but I'm worried that not only will she use it on bills, (which I don't really mind) but on other stuff, (I'm still trying to figure out where the money for the big-ass couch we have came from). I might apparently be depressed as I went to the government for ideas as to how much money I could end up if I moved, and she asked me a few health questions and stated that my answers are symptoms of depression and I should go to a doctor to check it out.

The choice I have to make is, either stay here and live my life as normal, with my mum who shouts and complains about everything, my brothers who hate me half the time, and my dad who is apperently dissapointed in me, or take the money when I'm eighteen, move onto campus, be happier, but risk my whole family hating me.

 

Really, I think there's two options here: you living at home and hating your family, or you moving away and them hating you.

I don't think we can make this decision for you. Personally, I think that if you have some form of depression however minor, living at home is no way to help it. Moving out might be the best option for your health. But really, I guess you have to decide what you value more.

 

This is, of course, something you have to come up with the definite answer yourself. However, I'm going to say you should move to campus, if what you say is true then you might just need it.

Hope you find you answer.

 

Well from your description of home...It doesn't sound like your family can get much worse with their disliking you...My question is if you do choose to move out...Would you ever be able to go back? If not try negotiating, tell them if things don't change then you will move out and see what they say

 

Put me in the situation and I might see it differently, but it seems like a fairly simple choice. Either you make yourself happy or you keep your family happy. Quite frankly, if you aren't exaggerating any more than I expect from most people, you deserve to make yourself happy even at the expense of letting your family get mad at you for a while. Believe me when I say that when your family hates you, it's never permanent. Good luck and I hope I helped.

 

If I were you, I would move to the university campus and get out of there since the environment is stagnating and rather suffocating. It is -your- money, for one thing, and it is meant to set you up for life so that you can support yourself and get out of following a pattern of poverty. I'd take advantage of it.

Your family may get upset with you at first, but if you are successful with college/university and you do set yourself up well in life, a parent has no choice but to be proud, or that parent just is not thinking clearly at all. I joined the military to get a college fund and to get out from under my mother who was rather nuts and though she was somewhat mad at me for it, it was the best decision in the end and I'm now independent of my family and can support myself. Because we were poor, my family had no intentions of letting me even get into a college so I did what I felt was the best and so far, I can say I haven't regretted it. If you have the help to change things for yourself, you will also be able to help your family later too, rather than just staying in the same trapped situation. Good luck, whatever you decide.