WANTED (Ch.3)

Discussion in 'Archives' started by La Sofa, Jun 3, 2007.

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What do you think of my sotry so far?

  1. GREAT!!!!!!

    4 vote(s)
    23.5%
  2. Good!

    4 vote(s)
    23.5%
  3. Okay

    3 vote(s)
    17.6%
  4. Lame....

    2 vote(s)
    11.8%
  5. 0_0

    4 vote(s)
    23.5%
  1. La Sofa ('_')-l3 No worries

    Joined:
    Apr 5, 2007
    134
    WANTED
    Chapter 3
    Attacks Come Together

    Heartless, Heartless. Why are the heartless attacking. My work is not done. No matter what heartless will always come. So my work is not done, its never done. I must defeat the heartless and find out why they attacked out of no where. I must do as the honor of a Keyblade Master

    The Heartless, they attacked Sora, Riku, Kairi, Mickey and Gentise all at the same time. One by one they found them self going to a protal to all the same place.
    "AHHHHHH!" Gentise screamed as he flew out of the protal hitting the wall.
    "Where the heck am I!?" Gentise said.

    "Wait! I am in a cell!" Gentise said.
    Just then Sora flew in from a protal hitting Gentise onto the bars of the cell. With the dirty grease on Gentise's face he scream "HEY!"
    Kairi flew out of a protal onto Sora. Kairi looked up with her forehead touching Sora's forehead.
    Riku jumped out of the protal and landed. "Hey Sora I think-" Riku saw Kairi on Sora on the floor. "0_0" Riku looked.
    "Where you two in the middle of something." Riku said.
    They both got kicked in the air.
    "Get off of me!" Gentise said.

    Riku saw Gentise and looked around. "Were in a cell...." Riku said. "Wow! Your smart!" Gentise said angrily. Mickey jumped out of the protal.

    Kairi looked around. "This place looks like.... WAIT! This is the cell I was in when the Organization got me!" Kairi said.
    "Why would someone bring us here?" Sora said. "This place was destroyed right?"
    They looked at the cell. They saw a black tube out there moving. Riku saw it. "What the-" He got up. They realized it was a snake. A black snake with patterns on it.
     
  2. kingdom945 Banned

    Joined:
    May 20, 2007
    Location:
    Jeromeykins will always be my darrellcake. <3
    66
    238
    It was good, but I really wanna suggest that
    you check grammar and spelling. That might
    make your life a little better. :D
     
  3. Love Kingdom Keeper

    Joined:
    Dec 14, 2006
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    In a world where the sunset casts slender shadows
    61
    783
    I like it !! Rock on dude , Rock on .
     
  4. ♥AL90♥ Hollow Bastion Committee

    Joined:
    May 21, 2007
    Location:
    Why is it about where I live? Where do you live?
    102
    638
    Who's gentise? you added that person in ch.2 right? this is a little confusing.