So, a few months back during summer break, I had two friends who liked each other a lot. One of them (let's call her C) convinced me totell the other one (we'll call him K), that she really liked him. So it all fell into place, and they began dating. Well, a couple weeks in, K started being a huge *******. He would insult others and say that he never watched a bunch of stuff as a kid and that was why he had a girlfriend. My initial reaction to that comment was anger. I was the one who had convinced him to tell C that he liked her (because he realky did, he told me this a bit before they started dating), and I had given him advice. I didn't ignore him altogether, but I was kinda distant. Anyway, C didn't like it, and she wanted him to not be an *******. She talked to him, he said okay, but he didn't stop. She got mad to the point where she broke up with him. They stopped talking and he believed everything that they told him about her. How she lies to people, cheats on them, makes them do awful things. I stuck up for her on multiple occassions when his friends started insulting her. He stopped talking to me altogether after that. One day, he texted me that he wanted his game back. I took the opportunity to ask him why he didn't like me anymore (because that's what he said "I don't like you anymore.") He replied that "I took that lying ****'s side" and that "I'd end up being hurt by that whore-y *****". I really couldn't believe what I was reading. I really didn't want to stop being his friend, but he told me that as long as I played my cards right, he would start trusting me again. Basically, what it seems is that he's trying to manipulate me to stop being friends with C, who is my best friend and is the younger sister I never had (I do have a younger sister, but I wanted one closer to my age, around 1 year younger, like C is). My point is, I really want to be friends with K again, since he was my only real guy friend. All my other friends are girls, so there's really no one I can hang out with and talk about manly stuff. I really dislike choosing sides, but the way he's acting... He's just pushing me towards choosing C iver him, but if I do that, he's lost forever, and I don't want that to happen. C calls me crying almost everyday because she wishes it could go back to our old trio, and so do I. All of K's friends talk to me the same as before. They don't seem to like or dislike me, and I've become a bit closr with them, but their no substitution. In short, I'm at a crossroads, and have no Idea what to do...
I think to stay friends with just because he's a guy is well...silly. K seems like a douche to be honest and if his friends are the ones who started the things about C then they can't be much better either. K was making you angry before all of this too so I don't think that'd change because even his girlfriend couldn't change it. I know choosing sides sucks but is he really worth losing C as a friend over? You really have to answer that before moving on but by the looks of it C did nothing wrong and if she's like family then, well, it seems like she would be the better person to side with. K may even be hoping for you to side with him just to hurt C too so there's also that to consider. You can always make more friends down the road too, both girls and guys, and hopefully without this drama or least have it over lesser things.
I'll talk to you about this in private as well, HoT, since I happen to know the people you're talking about, but my public opinion shall be this; K isn't worth talking to anymore. It sounds like he's taking the ******bag route of life, as all-too-many people of that kind of age do. "C" has been your best irl friend for ages, and I know for a fact that you love her as a sibling the same way I love mine. If it comes to a choice, you shouldn't hesitate to stand by her. K sounds like he's been manipulated by his newer friends into changing a little, and frankly; that happens. It's his own fault if he's going to let that take precedence over his old, frankly better, friendships, so you can't do anything but take a step back from him at this point. People change over time, and it's not always for the better. As much as it hurts to lose a friend, you're better off not associating with him anymore, and focusing your efforts of trying to look after C as a brother.
As already stated, K is worth worrying over. Not to sound harsh but after all that I highly doubt things will ever go back.to normal. And it sucks I know but you have to accept that. The best thing I can suggest right now is that you don't waste your time with K. He is not worth it. Make new friends. Take the first step and start talking to other people at school and such, and I am not saying this in a sense of replacing K. But you did say that you miss talking to other guys and stuff, so that might be what you have to do to fix it. As for K himself whenever you do talk to him, be nice and show him you still want to be friends, but at the same time you have to make it clear to him that you are not going to abandon C. And if he had to warn you on how to regain his friendship he will probably not be the sale friend you once knew. And would that be better then finding other friends? Stick by C and if K comes around then great, if not he is not worth it. Seriously you are one of the nicest guys I know and if he doesn't want to be friends with you that is his loss. Anyway I hope that is at least somewhat helpful. And if you you want to talk more about it I am always up for it. Just send me a message on Skype and we will talk
It already seems like you know what you need to do. Drop "K" like a hot potato and keep "C" close. "K" just seems like a jerk and you should stick up for "C," no matter what people are saying. It's the right thing to do.
