Legend of Zelda Four Swords: Dark Awakening Chapter 1 "How much further?" Red asked. His legs were killing him and he was hungry and thirsty. "Do you wanna learn how to kill Ganon and where to reforge the sword into the Master Four Sword?" Red thought for a moment with a look of disgust. " Not really. I mean how many times have you gone alone just to kill him? 5 times already?" Green refered to a memory of each of those times and said, " Well the Master Sword must have sucked then. This new sword we are going to forge will destroy him for sure and Vaati too." Blue being in the back of the group turned to Green and reminded him, "I thought the Silver Arrow was what destroyed ganon for sure?" Green was getting flusterd and Red discontiued his snide remarks. "Fine I will go by myself with purple...come on Purple lets go," Purple looked down and replied. "Why me?" "Because you are the clumsy noob and these two would just screw you over once i leave." Purple then followed Green and Red and Blue took their leave to Lon Lon ranch for some chateau romani milk. Green and Purple headed for Kakariko villiage to gain information on how to forge such a powerful sword. As Red and Blue walked up to Malon and asked for some milk Red decided to hit on her. "Hey you you you got some some of that Cucco?" Red looked like he was already drunk out of his mind. Malon turned to him. " Excuse me?!" She was getting angry with Red and she then turned to Blue and handed him their milk "Here you guys go...Red's an *******," Blue took the milk and agreed. Blue and Red noticed Epona and Red looked towards Malon "I'd like to ride that horsy real good!" Malon took that the wrong way and kicked him out of the ranch while Blue inquired that Red meant Epona. Malon turned and didn't seem to care about red at this point. Blue enjoyed his milk while Red sat at the gates hicupping. Back at Kakoriko, Green and Purple had discussed a possible solution for the forgery of the Master Four Sword. Apparently to do so they had to find the three broken pieces of the Master Sword which... how it in the name of Din did it break? Who knows? Green saw a Cucco passing and told Purple to hit it a few times. "Why?" "Because you'll get three gold rupees if you do" Purple looked at the cucco and said, " you sure?" "why would i lie to you...??" Purple drew his four sword and went to hit the cucco a few times as green leaves him saying, "dont mind me im just gonna wait in here" he snickered as he watched purple attack the cucco. the cucce clucked loudly and purple had no idea what was to happen to him. Back at the ranch both Blue and Red were trashed at this point and Malon was care taking them as they threw up all over the place. "Ugh, I'm done with this" she whistled for Epona and hooked up a cart to transport Blue and Red to Kakariko village. "Lets see if i can find Link there" Malon and the Red and Blue duplicates arrived to find that purple was lying face down in the dirt bleeding with half a heart left. "What is it with Link and his copies..? If Zelda were to find out, Green would have his ass chewed for it. " She made Purple drink some of the milk to heal him but the clone was now a drunken clumsy noob. "Where is Green? That son of a ***** he told me if if i hit a Cucco a couple times I'd get three golden rupees." Red popped out of the cart and stumbled over to him, " You dumb ass do you remember what happend with the super cock?" Purple fell flat on his face once again. Blue came out and said, " I believe the term is 'cock slapped' " malon looked at all three with shame and dissappointment and said to herself," so these guys are Hyrule's new heroes?" She facepalmed and started crying. "Wh...whats wrong with the milk maid?" Red asked as Green decided to show up at this time and was lauging his ass off, "You totally fell for it Purple, haha, this is something Red would have done" Blue turned and said, " You *******, leave that up to Red to do these things. Your the hero, I'm the master mind, he's the *******, and Purple is just in there being a noob." The day progessed as the four were luckily accepted to stay the night in an inn. Malon stayed to babysit all of them. The bartender started to play music as Purple, Red, and Blue began to feel the hangover. Green just sat in a corner telling Navi to shut up. Red got up and couldn't remember a thing he walked up to malon, " Did we do it last night?" Malon turned and slapped him on the face. "Whats your problem?" "I need to know if we did it cause then that means you like me and that we are meant each other for." Malon turned to Green, "Do I have to force you to put the Four Sword back? Because Red here is an ignorant slob." "But if i do then I won't have Blue whose smarter than I ever was" Malon just walked away from there leaving the Four Links to fend for themselves. A few minutes later, Green decided to call Epona. But, unfortunately for him, Malon Wasn't back yet. When Link heard Epona pull up, Malon was dirty and stumbling behind her. She was pretty pissed and looked at Link. "If your afraid to die from the monsters, you won't because I'll kill you all here and now." Green looked at her. "sorry Malon. Let me make it up to you. We can go to dinner and then do something else that you pick." Malon thought for a moment. "Ok, just because you're the one that's always on your best behavior. Pick me up at 7?" "Uh, sure," Green said. Malon walked away looking oddly Happy. "What did you just do?" said Navi. "I have a date with Malon at seven tonight." "oh boy," said his fairy as she went back into his hat.
