The Kinks Thread, or "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bondage"

I really hope this goes without saying, but there will be some naughtiness discussed in this thread. While I hope we can keep it under control, it's not exactly a PG subject, so younger readers be warned.

First off, let's make sure we all have the definition down: A kink is what most people refer to as a fetish in casual conversation. It's something that, for you personally, leads to a heightened state of arousal or gets you aroused more quickly than typical sexual behaviors. An actual fetish is more extreme than that, being the only thing that arouses the person in question, so that is not what we're referring to here. Another thread, perhaps.

People tend to be tight-lipped about this sort of thing, at least in the U.S., and that's unfortunate because it leads to a lot of people never learning what turn-ons they have in common. It is always regulated to certain social circles, and comes with nasty descriptors like "pervert," "slut," etc. This thread is not meant to be a sick display of debauchery; it's an effort to reduce the shame and taboo surrounding a perfectly natural and healthy facet of sex and sexual discourse.

So don't be shy! Tell us what turns you on! If there's a kink out there you don't really get, you can ask about that too; you might find someone qualified to speak on it here. Maybe you'll even find somebody who likes all the things you do, or who's willing to indulge your tastes~

I would like to lay down a few ground rules first, though. I would ask that we don't get too... visceral in our descriptions, as that would conflict with one of the cardinal rules. Younger members are not disallowed from joining the discussion, and so I don't want to see anyone bashing teenagers or trying to chase them out; sexual desire develops well before the law permits us to act on it, and there's no harm in talking it out in the meantime. Finally, if you're going to post in here, be mature about it. Don't jump in just to mock something someone else is into, or to say something asinine like "sex is icky." You're not funny and no one will take kindly to it.

 

Honestly, I don't have anything specific that turns me on. It really depends on the situation in question. Like, if I were to kiss a girl, knowing full well we'd end up having sex, that prospect would turn me on. I tend to be able to control myself pretty well with these things.

 

I'm an asexual with little to no sex drive to speak of. It takes a lot to even get me interested in the mere idea of intercourse.

However, I find a lot of BDSM attractive. The power play and the human furniture aspects mostly. Because I love the idea of human footstools to no end. Just come home from work, and put my feet on my sub's shoulders. And they cannot move unless I say they can. I might even have them gagged and blindfolded depending on my whims.

Gender wouldn't make a difference because blah, sexual contact. It's the attraction of power and control.

 

I think it'd be really cool if they said, "You're like, twenty percent, cooler than the other people I've dated." It'd be on- *shot*

I suppose if I had to hazard a guess, it'd be clothing. Not much else other than that. Your clothes have to look cute and cool. I'm an odd one . . . I know.

I agree with Laurence as well. Gender wouldn't make the difference. If your clothes are cute and cool, it's a turn on for me ^^

 

I am a control freak, and this fact doesn't change in bed. I like to be in control and dominant of my partner. My favorite thing is when they're resistive, shy, coy, maybe even a little embarrassed before I'm able to make them give into me. I like to feel that power over somebody. That being said, I also like variety and I sometimes enjoy taking the submissive role as well. It all depends on my mood.

 

In my previous relationship, I loved it when we'd act all lovey-dovey with each other, give each other "the look", and then basically turn into sex fiends. I find it arousing beyond measure when a usually reserved girl gives in to lust entirely. Anticipation, the act of leaving me hanging juuuuuuuuuust long enough, is the most pleasurable torture imaginable. I don't know whether that counts as an actual kink though, so here's another one I know will count.

I love tearing off clothes. A girl who is willing to show up wearing only hand-me-downs that I can utterly rip apart is a girl I'd marry, and that's coming from someone who doesn't think well of marriage. I also like the creaking of a bed, sex in naughty locations (the middle of a sports field is especially high on my places-to-do-it list), dirty talk and playing with her breasts, but I guess that last one isn't all that unusual.

Judging from the list above, you might think that I want sex to be as animalistic as possible, but that's not the case. On the contrary, moments like the ones I mentioned above should only happen every so often in order for them to be as effective as they can be. It's their rarity, their whimsical timing and the possibility to catch me off guard that makes them so arousing.

Against my better judgement I hope that I haven't disgusted anyone.

 

The reflective, discussing types are always the kinkiest bastards. I'm not even surprised anymore.

(I say this in jest, of course.)

 

Reviving this thread. It had potential, and it ended prematurely.

I have a thing for cross-dressers. Manly women/feminine men. I do not know from where it stems, with the former persons I suspect it's a mix of reverence. I have the utmost respect for cross-dressing women. I'm not sure if it's that I want to be them or I am attracted to them, probably both. Maybe I just like surprises. In any case, cross-dressing women excite me like no other creature, they make me blush. Of course I like feminine/boyish men in dresses as well, it isn't exclusive to one gender.

Sexual attraction is secondary in importance, personal features are at the forefront in prominence. Hence it's kind of difficult for me to pinpoint 'kinks,' I think this counts but am unsure. I have never been ruled by sexuality, I wouldn't jump anyone or anything like that and I'd be fine with a cis-gendered significant other just the same. I guess this breaches into kink territory, tho'.

 

What is a cross dressing woman in your opinion, exactly? Exclusively the clothes associated with men, like a woman wearing trousers and shirts (tomboys, kinda), or more like physical male features, large muscles, short hair, hairy features on the face or extremities?

I've never really thought of 'cross dressing' women, since I've grown up in a world where women wear trousers and skirts alike, and the only time I've ever really seen of cross dressing women has been in historical context like women in the 50s wearing jeans, or ancient female warriors dressed in male clothing. It. Doesn't feel like such a thing anymore.

 

I think this thread is quite important simply because people don't talk about it and it is something we repress and feel shy about even when we meet someone who we should share these things with as it would make sex much more enjoyable.

I tend to prefer being dominated. I don't really have loads of turn ons though that I know of yet, I am mostly turned on if I like the person and, currently, there is only one person who I feel particularly turned on by. I am not the sort of person to jump at anyone or just even someone I like at a bar, I actually need to know the person so it just doesn't do it for me when I see a guy in a nightclub or something.

I am also a romanticist, I love the guy being romantic and loving, that is a big turn on but that doesn't have to last for the whole duration, just to get me in the mood. I suppose I just like to know I am cared for.

 

I'll narrow it down, then. If I can't tell the person's sex, they're doing it right. I find slim muscles attractive, hair not so much but it all depends on the person's physique I suppose. Androgyny pleases me.

Spoiler: attractive individuals, men & women alike

An old photo, and obviously a woman but Brigitte Helm receives bonus points for the kitty. Suited women are universally attractive.

As an offhand note, I wonder when it will become a social norm for men to wear dresses. Probably quite unlikely as it it hinders movement, pants may have caught on because they didn't. Wearing pants may have been 'empowering,' wearing dresses (unless you belong to the respective sex) is degrading to most.

 

Some older cultures have had skirt like clothing, as well as some tribal cultures. Skirts are not male orientated in the modern sense because they're designed to be feminine, for women, and not for men, which they could be more catered and designed for, over time. I mean, look at cartoons, anime, video games, and so on, where even men look cool in them, though mostly it's robes or the like, but pretty much considered skirt like.The thing about fashion is that it changes with the time and practicality. Western world has a lot of impracticality because it's not needed for survival anymore, it's all about aesthetic and visual design. Whilst elsewhere, like Mongolian nomad woman wear trouser like clothing because it retains heat better, and their winters are deadly if they aren't well covered.

Not really a big fan of transsexuals or cross dressers, not that I'm against them nor against the idea of 'cross dressing'. I've always been entertained by drag queens in pantomimes and am not against it for a laugh or something but not really as a lifestyle. Just seems a bit vain to care so much to how you look that you have to wear in general, not just cross dressers, like those women who go to clubs in massive heels and tight dresses where they can't move their legs. They want to wear it, go ahead, but it doesn't mean I'm not going to look and 'judge' them on first appearance.

But properly on the topic, I don't feel like I have any particular 'kink', which is why i haven't really posted before. I go through moods mainly, similar to 'Now what am I in the mood for dinner today?' but instead 'Now what kinky mood am I in today?'. It's not so far been anything extreme, like bondage, torture, etc, more like along the lines of knee high stockings, glasses, freckles, costumes, light fetish stuff. More often than not though, I have kinks for certain racial backgrounds, like some days I'm just incredibly attracted to chinese, indian, latino, black, but that's not really a kink maybe.

 

I have never had a girlfriend (don't look too shocked), but I've long felt that I am most likely to be the submissive of the two in a relationship, at least as far as any form of lovemaking goes.
As for kinks, I will confess to a bondage fetish myself. I'm not really into the more 'extreme' fodder with leather and whips and such, rather just ropes and a cloth gag. A part of me believes the fetish stems from a desire to want to 'save' someone, to protect them, do something noble, etc. Hence, the poignant excitement of witnessing a tied damsel, of which you must 'rescue'.