So I haven't posted here in awhile. But I need some advice, KHV. I am seriously bursting with either anger or sadness lately. I have also made a talent of just throwing my hands in the air and saying "fuck it" and not caring about anything at all, which in turn comes to bite me when I have to. I feel like anytime someone says something to me I want to just punch them, or something else. Mainly, it stems from my friend, my parents, and the guy I currently like. Friend: One of my friends is going down a road that makes me want to vomit on a daily basis. To be honest, I've never been anymore disappointed in my life. I don't know what to do with her, since I've known her since kindergarten, we've been so close, and she lives close to me. Even our parents are friends. 1. She keeps blowing me off. For example, I called her yesterday at about 10 in the morning to ask her if she wanted to hang out. I don't know, I feel as though if I hang out with her it will make her not want to make bad decisions. So, she tells me that she'll call me or text me later telling me if she can or can't hang out. It wasn't like I was weighing my whole day on her, but she didn't call or text me, and she wrote on facebook that she's going over someone else's house. And she keeps doing this. I mean if you're going to choose someone over me, don't put on facebook, on full fucking display. 2. She will come on my bus or stay after school, and not call her parents. Which usually results in her getting grounded or something. And everyone getting worried sick. She will also try to sneak home, like, one time she came on my bus and then decided she had to go home so she walked across a major highway type thing to get home. She could have killed herself. 3. She tells me about how she sneaks guys into her house without her parents knowing. See, I don't know how she pulls this off at all. It's nearly impossible. It's either she's mental and making this all up, or she's doing bad things behind her parents, which could honestly result in something bad. Should I distance myself from her? Tell her parents? Try to talk to her about it and see if maybe she's acting out because she's upset? Family: Not much to say, I'm just frequently having fights with my mom about grades (I'm a good student and she shouldn't be complaining). It just seems like I'm never enough for my family and they think I'm not going to be successful at all. Should I just ignore this and "do the best I can"? My sister is acting like a whiny bitch. She is in the preteen stage of her life, which is like hell for our household, I try to ignore her but it's so hard to live with that monster. She will pick fights for no reason, and just act out and scream over nothing. Ignore this too? Or punch her in the face? I'm seriously tempted at this point. The guy I like currently: I am seriously confused. I really am. I don't even know what to say anymore. I've been talking to him for a few weeks, and it seems like he likes me. All my friends say so. I mean, they tell me if it were anymore obvious it would smack me in the face. And I know that sounds all well and good, but it's really not. I have so many doubts. Like, I don't know if my friends are just saying that to be nice to me. My self esteem isn't that low, I just feel as though no guy could ever like me, that I'm not pretty enough or cool enough. And when something happens like him not texting me, I'll think that it's me. And that I did something. Because I care about him. I'm wondering KHV, what do you think? How do you act when you like someone? Is this abnormal?
While distancing yourself from her may sound like a nice idea at the moment, you've known her for so long and it'd be a shame to just let her go like, especially at a time like this in her life. I'll be honest, she's treating you like **** and you shouldn't have to put up with that, but if you care about her, you should try to help her. Either confront her about it on your own or get an adult/another friend you trust to let her know that what she's doing isn't right and she should stop being so reckless. If she doesn't listen to you, there might not be much more you can do. But if you just move on and forget about her and, god forbid, something happens to her, do you really want that on your conscience? I can't say that I have much experience in the grades department because I'm lucky enough to have a mom that is happy as long as I'm not failing, but if it's really to the point where you can't take your mother's disapproval, you should confront her about it. Let her know that you're doing all that you can as far as school goes, and that the pressure from her isn't helping. If she doesn't listen, then stop listening to her (as far as grades go). If you're happy with how you're doing, that's all that matters. I can however say that I have tons of experience with difficult siblings, and sometimes, it's just easier to bottle it in and let her be. Most everyone goes through a phase like that, and sadly, nothing you say or do will really change any of it. Avoiding her might be the best bet you have. She will, hopefully, grow out of it. Well I'm not sure what sort of advice I can lend you as far as how to act around him, but it seems to me like you're very down on yourself. Self-confidence really can have an astonishing effect on your life. Try not to second guess yourself and your actions all the time, and remind yourself everyday that you're a great person. It sounds cheesy and conceited, but honestly, the moment I decided to accept the things about me I didn't like and just focus on what I liked about myself, my life improved by so much. You're always going to have that voice in your head that says "am I doing this right?" or "should I have said something else?," but don't let anyone make you feel like there's something wrong with you.
