so like... yeah i'm in some deep trouble with myself

well, today my boyfriend was supposed to come up and i don't think he's going to, so my mom decides to work today, and she works on my computer, and I'm on my sister's computer. My sister is gone and my brother comes in and aggravates her pet bird, making it squawk and cry. So i make him leave and he screams and yells, though he knows better. and then my mom comes in and screams at the top of her lungs (not exaggerating, i mean literally) "That's enough! The next time my company hears a scream in the background I'm fired!" and I'm not the one screaming, it's my brother! It's not my fault he's screaming, my parents raised him like that, not me... so like... i go outside and sit on the porch steps and cry for half an hour, and i scratched my arm, telling myself to take away my emotional pain and instead give myself physical, to get rid of the emotional... so like.. I'm pretty messed up... =(

 

.................dang ........you know all of us here are here to help right?

 

Yeah i know i just..... i really need someone to talk to about it =[

 

I'm probably gonna sound mean for this, but, that is really just f'ed up. You think given yourself phsyical pain gets rid of emotional pain? I mean, tell me, are you that pathetic? Get the hell over it. People have to deal with the bull **** every day of your life. You think that you got f'en **** problems? I've got problems that would probably make you go suicidle then. I mean, hearing this with what you just described makes me sick to my stomach, so get the hell over it, because your problems aren't even as bad as many of the other people. People are stuck on the streets, suffering. You've got some people who have been abandond and godda do stuff on their own. We live in a time where you got all this bull, we got money getten wasted for war, people's family members are dien, I mean, what kind of a f'en hell do you think they are goin through. GET THE HELL OVER IT, AND QUIT BEIN DAM SELF CENTERED. DON'T FOCUS ON YOUR OWN DAM PROBLEMS, AND TRY HELPEN OUT SOMEONE ELSE!

I am assuming that a lot of people are gonna bad rep this post, but I honostly don't give a crap, cuz this is just sad, and it pisses me off to hear **** like this



Seriously though, you should talk to someone about it though, but don't talk to your family about it though, becuz they will most likely try to get you therapy or some bull like that, and most therapists are just asses, and might just worsen it. Hopefully, the others here can give you some good advise though.....

 

The physical pain is like a drug, it works for the moment but it can be addictive and kill you, believe me it will

If your mother can be talked to about this in a civillised way then you should seriously try to. Or if your brother cares about your mother, tell him he could cause her to lose her job if he keeps doing things like that.

THough if your desperate i'd suggest just trying to get the bird away from your brother all the time, maybe keep it in your room with the door locked. Or if you are deseperate just walk away when your brother troubles the bird, get away as soon as possible and forget.

 

He'll cry if i take the bird out yelling "It's not your bird! It's not yours!" like he's the boss of everything. He's 7 years old and he thinks he's king of the whole world. if he don't get something, he cries and becomes the world's largest brat....

 

Can't you reason with him or your mother about what is happening?

 

Excuse me, I see that you're trying to make a point. But the hell with doing it so bluntly. Can't you see that she is in a sad state of mind ? It's other ways to break news.

Sarah, I'm really sorry you're feeling this way. But don't cut yourself or anything like that. You should really talk to someone irl as well to get things off your chest.
Holding it inside will just bottle up feelings you sooner or later will have an urge to get out.

And of course I'm here, on PM or MSN if you feel like talking :')

 

what gives you the right to say that to anyone? Who the hell do you think you are? she came here to get help, not to be called pathetic. If you have nothing helpful or constructive to say, keep your opinions to yourself, you don't help anyone with snide ****ing comments like that.

 

i agree with this.

but there are ways you could have said this without sounding so rude....and you know it.

this is the problem she is going through right now, and even when it might seem minuscule to you, this problem is life consuming to her.

we have got to try and understand people better, because if we cant help solve minor problems like this.

then how can we solve the big ones that affect our world.


i dont believe in the de-rep system....but the thing is you know that what you said was blunt.

and assuming self control....yea, you can do it, but decided not to.

because im sure you have probelms, but think them to be minuscule, and even when they are it doesnt kill the fact that they are still problems.


just please try not to post things like this, and if you cant control yourself from thinking that way, then dont post, its always better not to be a prisioner of one's words.


as for you cupkake, try and calm down, dont look at this problem as so big, im sure you must be more shocked by how your mother screamed, and how your little bro is ruining your life.


but , if you calm down , and think it through...you will find a solution to stop your brother from his wrongdoings.


EDIT: guys please stop bashing deathsight, im sure he was just trying to help in his own way.

 

Sarah as your friend i feel compelled to say i'm actually worried about you.Physical Pain does work but at the same time eventually it will stop working and you'll revert to something much worse.You need to get away from your family or you need a form of escapism.I suggest a good book or a book on something you like or even re-reading your favourite books.It works for me and it will continue working.
I'm actually scared that you'll go further sarah so please try and push away from physical pain and please try and don't go further.
If none of this stuff is working go to a physiciatist and speak of this stuff your feeling.It's completely confidential and you wouldn't beleive what speaking about your troubles will actually do.Half the problem is not talking about it.I've concidered a physiciatist myself.

 

ohh, thats real helpful....worse part, I don't know if your being serious or not...

I think you should really talk to someone, like your friends, and try to get through it, they are usally better than shrinks.

 

You are frustrated and upset but as others said, hurting yourself is not the way to go. There are more pleasant things you can do to take away mental pain, such as doing something like exercising, reading a book, go for a walk, ride a bike, whatever. Even if you have to cry for a bit doing those things, they will also ease your mind.

As for your mother, I'd make the suggestion that tonight when she is not working and has the company stuff going on, wait for a moment of respite and then go to talk to her. Tell her that you want to explain what happened and that she needs to talk to your little brother and not -you- about what's going on unless she wants you to duct tape his mouth because at this point your options are gone. You told him to not do a bad deed and he screamed so unless she wants you covering his mouth or knocking him unconscious, she better deal with the actual problem. Tell her that -YOU- will be quiet and have been. It is he that obviously needs more time and to be told directly to stop.

I know she may try to cut you off and tell you that he might not be that way. By what you are saying he sounds like the 'baby' of the house that gets some spoiling. However, if she doesn't listen you may have to just leave it at that and say something along the lines of 'well I'm not going to stop him anymore or watch him since every time I do something he screams. I can't stop him and only you can.' She is stressing out from what is going on with her job and I'd suggest you do this when later you both have some free time to do some talking. Try to be benevolent and understand her situation is very stressed and she's flipping out because of that. Don't hurt yourself, please. Those same endorphins you get by giving yourself physical pain can also happen by doing other activities that are not that way and you do not need to be ruining your life or scarring yourself. Others make life hard at times and you certainly don't have to help make your own life worse. I hope things get better for you soon. Your brother may take time to have to deal with. The screaming thing is something she's going to have to discipline out of him.

How old is your brother also? If he's old enough to go to school and all he might understand if you try talking to him nicely and explain if he screams mommy could lose her job. You might also want to try getting along with him better in some ways because when you say no, you could do it better and he'd be more responsive with positive enforcement. I.e. when you told him to not touch the bird, you can try saying it in a nicer way of "you don't want to hurt the bird, do you? Let's not do that and maybe if you want, let's try doing something else together.' This could help him stop doing it without actually sounding too domineering to him where he will scream because he's not getting his way. It works very well on young boys and girls and it might take some time to get used to but I would suggest more positive enforcement instead of negative and just saying 'stop that!' etc. They also learn values and morals from it so you'd be helping him and you and your mom in the long run.

As for the other events, things happen. Maybe have you tried calling your boyfriend or another friend and just chit chatting with that person a while to feel better and find out what's going on etc? Even if you don't tell them what is going on, perhaps that would uplift your spirits some. Hang in there!

I never bad rep anyone because I can rant elsewhere just fine. Look, you are right to say there are certainly far worse problems that can go on for people but the point here is that everyone, that means you too, has a nervous breakdown every now and then. Yes, her problems separated are not that big a deal but when you take a group of small things that can make you anxious and then pile them together...well anyone is bound to feel miserable.

Life is not easy for everyone and that's why this area exists. It isn't meant to ridicule or demean people. I see what you are trying to do by telling her to 'get over herself' etc but seriously, that is not needed or wanted here. The people who post here want genuine assistance and perhaps they just want a stress reliever and to share some of their issues with to have a vent. There isn't a one of us alive on this world that doesn't get ticked off, annoyed, frustrated, saddened etc at some events that happen in our lives. You called her selfish but I also can say the same thing to you. It is a very selfish thing to tell someone else to get over his/her problems and then say 'your problems would make someone commit suicide' if they can't handle their own 'trivial' ones. Consider that please the next time you tell someone to suck up their problems and that their life could just not be comparable to your own. Sorry to be harsh here but I really don't know how to say it another way.

 

Thanks alot repliku ^_^

That is probably what i'll do... The thing is if i tell him the part about the bird like "You dont' wanna hurt the bird" i KNOW for a fact he'll yell "no i won't!"

my mom thinks I'm the one causing my brother to scream so she yells at me for it.... She won't talk to me, even if i try to.... usually she's in a bad mood, and usually when we're both alone in the car, that's usually the only calm time we ca talk, and when i look really upset.

 

There's a differance between realistic and pessamistic.Cin if you made a thread like this you'd expect people to support you so in conclusion...Shut up.

 

I agree, this is Help with Life, not talk **** about others, if you can't say anything that can help, don't say anything.

 

it is in her mind and i know because i've been in a similar situation.Not alot of people can just pull out it.I was one of few that is able to.She needs help and since this is the help for life section and your no help just go to the spam zone of something.