Not a Sebax series story in Amber's Cookie Castle

Believe it or not, that's the real title:

Not a Sebax Series Story in Amber's Cookie Castle... in Read-D![3-D]​

From the writer that Destined once said: "Who's he?" [Hold for laughter XD] A story about a total nut, pun intended, in the Organization that's not Sebax. This guys name is Rejryx, a total Jerry Lewis spin-off with an entirely impossible name to pronounce. Let's just say he's like Jerry Lewis with a few facial changes and the same voice, but isn't Jerry Lewis's Nobody. I kept thinking, "think of the best character to put into the cookie castle from the spam playground" and then Jerry Lewis came to mind. Oi Vei.

In this story, Rejryx, let's call him Rejie[Reggie], gets in trouble with frequent visitors of the Cookie castle, cookie guards in the chocolate moat, the cookie people inside the castle, KP, Amber herself, Evil Man-eating Badgers, and the real Jerry Lewis with a writer's-cameo Dean Martin.

Just so you know, I actually got permission from Amber to make this.
I asked:

"Has anybody ever made a Fan-Fiction that takes place in you cookie castle?"

Amber: "No, but I can see where this is going."

That's permission....right...+_+

So before I write way too much of a introductory explainatory paragraph (Too late!)

Here's the prolouge:

"As Number two in the organization, I award you, Xigbar, formerally Braig, the position of Mission-assignor." Xenmas says with honor, handing Xigbar a badge with Sheriff scrathed out and "Mission-Guy scribbled beside it.

"Thanks Xenmas, you're too much..." Xigbar says with disdain, noticing the obvious mistake on the badge.

"Think nothing of it." Xenmas replies curtly, still thinking he had awarded Xigbar a high-honor.

Just then, Rejryx, a new Nobody to the Organization, happened to be striding by, solemly.
And so Xigbar quickly teleported in front of the Neophyte and halted him.

"What's your hurry, you've gota a mission to do!" Xigbar says with authority.

Rejryx just stood there, hood up, hiding his face, silent as the grave.

"What's your problem? I said you got a mission." Xigbar says annoyed.

Rejryx still just stands there, silent.

"Alright that's it." Xigbar says, fully annoyed and taking his badge and stick the sharp pin needle on the back into Rejryx's left side hard.

In response, Rejryx's hood flies back, showing a kid-like face, with a nassaly kid-voice coming out of the wide mouth.
The scream strecthes on for about five minutes and Xigbar, staring blankly at Rejryx and covering his ears, takes the pin out of the other nobodies side.

Rejryx puffs some air comically out and puts his hands on his hips and bends over slightly to the left.
"Ow..that hoit me..." He groans in a nassaly kid-voice, even though he was close to six feet tall.

"Shut up..." Xigbar groans and slaps Rejryx upside the hand with his own hand.

"What's with being so rude?" Rejryx asks in a huffy deep voice.

"You deaf?? I said you got a mission!" Xigbar exclaims, yelling at the top of his lungs.

"Sorry, It was hard to hear you, these hoods aren't easy to hear through..." Rejryx complains fumbling the now loose material over his shoulder.

Xigbar just stares blankly into space for a while...
"You...get....used....to it....trust me..." Xigbar mutters through his teeth.

"Alright then, what's the mission?" Rejryx asks in his normal nassaly voice again, playfully hitting Xigbar in the arm, who responds by still staring off into space without moving.

"Let me think..." Xigbar mutters, then breaks out of his insomnia.
Disney World...no..we already have plans for that...
Hallow Bastion....nooo....going attack that in a week...
Olympus Colesium...no...Xaldin gave Demyx that mission yesterday....
Amber's Cookie castle?....sound sgood, he couldn't screw that up..

"Amber's cookie Castle...don't screw it up..." Xigbar responds, winded and exhausted from the pure annoyance of being around Rejryx.

Rejryx went into a sloppy salute and did the huffy deep voice again.
"Yes Sir, Mon Cap-e-tan!"

"Whatever.." Xigbar sighs wheeling around to escape the other way while Rejryx disappears throug a portal to darkness.

MEANWHILE I always wanted to do that.

"Alright an A in History!" Says a burly, handsome young teenager, popular with everybody, a member of the junior high football team, and the one "mosted voted to become President of the U.S.A." Who went by the name of Benny.

Congratulations, young Benny, because of your hard work against the darkness..I award you, the keyblade... comes a voice that isn't even audible to the auidience and could be somebody like King Mickey, Kairi's grandmother, or that kid who looks like Roxas in the next KH game coming out. Who knows.

Just then, a keyblade appears in Benny's hand, knocking away his papers and unsettling the area with a small gust of wind.

"Alright!" Benny exclaims, brandishing the weapon.

Just then, Benny's Report card flops onto the ground showing a D in Algebra.

The voice imediatley responds to this saying...Bad Benny. No Key for you! in a slightly german accent that the auidience still wouldn't even be able to hear even if this was a movie or a video game or something.

Then the keyblade in benny's hand disappears out of Benny's hands.
"Hey! Who could replace me??" Benny asks in anger, clenching his hand into a fist.

That guy. The voice replies curtly, and the keyblade that disappeared floats above benny's head and points directly at a totally nerdy kid with twelve-inch glass tied together at the nose with several inches of duct tape, snot dripping out of his nose, and a plaid button-shirt with highwater khaki pants.

Benny looks at the other kid confused.
"You gotta be kidding me..."

Actually, yes, yes I am...haha...I really mean that guy though. the voice says plainly, even wording out haha. And then the keyblade redirects itself at a sharply dressed teenager with slight buck teeth, black hair with highlights, and only minor acne. Although this kid is revered to be as much a nerd as the complete dork from earlier.

Benny looks at the kid still with anger and confusion.
"You're still kidding me, right?"
(*)

(The End of the prolouge, expect the rest soon.

Bonus: If you can point out a joke hidden inside that's hard for some people to find, and explain it, you get free rep.)

Chapter 1:

A punching blow came at at a young teen with sudden intesity.

The attacker was none other than Benny, the most popular dude at *Input name
of school hezer*, What did I do to deserve
being attacked, Base, the attackee thought as he dodged the blow?!

"I'll show ya who gets the keyblade!" Benny yelled in rage as
he pulled back his arm for another punch.

Base couldn't defend himself this time, so he just put his arms in front of his face
and hoped for the best. Closing his eyes and awaiting the sting of pain...that didn't come...

"OW!!OW!!" Came the pain cries from not Base's mouth, but Benny's, who was holding his punching hand with the other and blowing on the bluging hand.
Apparently Benny had hit something pretty hard to have his hand swollen like that... Base ponders.

Just then Base's eyes look down in wonder to see that his own hands were
now the home to a glittering and shiny new keyblade. But why the heck was
it made of cookiees?!

The complete dork that had been used as the butt of the Voice's joke earlier lunges
for the blade and bites into it, only to loose his tremendous Beaver teeth.

"Ok, not made of cookies..but still designed with cookies..." Base mutters to
himself as the Dork breaks down on the floor, gripping his mouth.

Base looks from Benny withering in pain, to the dork withering in pain.
"Ok...Now what..?" He asks confusedly, looking down at the weapon.

You must save the cookie castle! Comes the voice from earlier,
taking Base in glowing hands and engulfing him in blinding light.

you must save...you must save...you must save... Echoes the voice in Base's ears.

You must- "OK I GET ALREADY I MUST SAVE!" Base intervenes
when the voice echoes it once more after a pause.

Jeez, you don't have to be so rude. The voice says hurt,
and the light flashes again and Base finds himself in front of a mammoth castle made completely out of cookies.

Before he could do anything however, base loked to one low
to the ground window where a man in a hooded coat was biting into the windowframe.

"No eating the castle!" Comes a voice from inside, and the cloaked man
is sent flying through the air by a overly large red boxing-glove, sending him into the moat.

"Help, OH HELP, Can't swim..Oi vei..swim can't...Oi can't...HELP!!"
The man yells varyingly from the water...no...chocolate milk(!) moat surrounding the castle.

"Er... Hold on!" Base tries to say heroically and plunges in
after the man goes head under below the surface.

But when Base dives in, he hits his head on the bottom of the moat just
three inches from the surface. Then he blacks out.

After a while, Base finds himself back on the ground, but wet, being observed by the guy he had seen drowning.

"Ok, my mistake, the moat wasn't so deep. I'm young, I'm entitled.."
The cloaked guy mutters.

"Then how come you went below?!" Base asked the hooded man angrilly, after all,
he had risked his own life to save a guy who wasn't in trouble.

Rejryx looked down at the kid thoughtfully for a moment.
"I wanted to know how the moat tasted.." Rejryx meekly replies with a shrug.

"WHAT?!" Base asks angrilly, taking his oddly designed keyblade out.

Rejryx looks shocked for a moment but then points to the very large Buck teeth bitten
into the very top of the blade, like two fenrirs.
"Is that part of the design..?" He asks confusedly, not shocked anymore.

Base is equally shocked at looks at the two Buck teeth deep inside the blade.
Before it had just looked like a stick with a square handle before that dork bit into it.
He just didn't realize how much it looked more like a key until now.
"Ummm...No...it's just school I guess.." Base says slowly, at first unsure what to answer back.

"What're you here for?" Rejryx asks.
"I'm here to survey the castle for the Nobodies." Rejryx notes dominately.

"Uhh...I'm here to er..." Base replies, not knowing why he was in this weird place.
You are here to destroy a Nobody surveying the castle Comes the voice, again,
but this time only inside Base's own head.

Immediatley Base is shocked about his mission.
No way I'm going to to kill this guy, he just saved my life! Base
thought-replies to the voice.

Either you kill him or I kill you!

That's kinda morbid, you never threatened Sora in the game!

He's too dull to notice what threat is...He didn't even understand "The day you will open the door is both far and near...COME ON! That's so easy!

No it's not, that makes no sense!

Does too!

Does not!

Ok smart guy! I rule this story, let's see how you argue when you start punching yourself

Base starts hitting himself.

Hey! Stop writing that!^

Base continues hitting himself.

"OW!"

"Hey...are you ok...?" Rejryx asked confused, watching Base hit himself continuously.

"Huh? Oh yeah! Fine.." Base asks confused himself, still hitting himself and trying to stop his hitting hand with his other, while the hitting hand tries to push past the one blocking it.

"Whatever..see ya.." Rejryx bids goodbye and backs away, unsure of
what this guy was doing.

"Yeah, bye!" Base replies stressfully, still trying to prevail over his own hand.

Base stops hitting himself.

"Finally!" Base groans, letting loose his hand, but the propulsion that had built up in trying to keep the hand away from his face caused the hand to punch him even harder anyway.
Then he blacked-out again.

(If you haven't caught on to one joke, I'll tell you. Sebax/Base in my book series is always blacking out from being hit, or falling from something...XD A self-parody there)

 

... How did I not find this story before?

:blink:

XD

I'm really curious to find out what happens next...

:D Please continue~


Oh, I almost forgot:

THIS RANDOM DOOHICKY SAYS
THIS GUY CAN MAKE THIS STORY
ABOUT MY CASTLE~​

 

Yippe!

Real allowance to make this fanfic!

I'l continue since this fanfic has been reanimated.