Never Argue W/ A Child!

NEVER ARGUE WITH A CHILD

Situation #1

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said, it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".


Situation #2

A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was? The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "Calm down, they will in a minute."


Situation #3

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother has several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Mom, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"


Situation #4

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael. He's a doctor.'" A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher. She's dead."


Situation #5

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching." Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."


XDDDDDDDDDDD i got this from my dad trough e-mail!

 

Must...

Mass...

E-Mail...

TO ALL MAH FRIENDS!!!! @-@

*does*

 

the teacher got pwned!

 

Indeed she did. >D

 

kids rock! don't they?

 

I lawl'd at Situation 3.

 

This,ish,HILARIOUS!

 

*snorts* That sounds like something I would do!!!

 

you do understand Jonah was not swalled by a whale right, It says fish, and at that time they have found evidence of a fish that had the ability to swallow a man.(random info for today)

 

Hahaha! Those were good!
Thanks for making my day.

 

That's what I was thinking, too, but, hey, jokes are jokes. XD

"Take all you want... God's watching the apples. C="

XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

 

LAWL! That was the funniest thing(s) I have read in a week! Phew, Imma send that to lotsa peoples!