My EPIC Phailure of a cast (Death Note Remake)

Zac Efron as Light Yagami (LMMFGDAO)
Hugh Laurie (The guy from the show House) as Ryuk
Hilary Duff or Hannah Montana as Misa Amane
Johnny Depp as L (I so fail.lol)
Madonna or Leonardo Dicaprio as Mello
Some Albino kid as Near
Michael jackson as Rem
Keanu Reeves as Teru Mikami

I'll probably come up with more failure later.

What would be your epically failure of a cast?