I'm being guilt-tripped into playing an MMORPG

P · Feb 13, 2011

I joined Kingdom of Loathing a while ago, then never played again. I just got the following email:

The Kingdom of Loathing said:

Dear Pika_power,

Okay, I'm not good at this kind of thing, but I feel like I have to give it a try. So, here goes:

I was hanging out the other night, listening to some old mp3s, and I was just overcome with memories of when we used to hang out all the time. Remember? You were an intrepid, fearless adventurer, and I was the free-to-play, fun-and-funny online role-playing game that won your heart. Do you still remember those good times? I can't stop thinking about them.

I mean, I know things got kind of messed up at the end, and believe me, I'm sorry. If I could take any of that back, I totally would. And I know people grow and change, and you're not the same person you were then, but hey -- I've changed, too! I thought and thought about how to win you back. I figured I'd make you a mix CD, but I couldn't decide what "our song" was. So I just concentrated on becoming a better game for you, and here's what I came up with:

Remember how much fun you used to have with your clan? Alternately, remember how you never joined a clan because you didn't see the point? Either way, clans now have clan dungeons, group zones where your whole clan can work together. Crawl through sewers to Hobopolis, a vast underground vagrant vacation vista! Slide into the slime tube, and stir-fry sassy slimes!

I know I wasn't the prettiest game when we were together, so I had some work done. Almost every interface got an interface-lift. You can even manage most of your inventory via chat commands! I also came up with a way for you to automate some of the things you don't love about the game, so you can spend more time with the parts you do love.

Not only that, but there are way more animated .gifs than there were before. Don't worry; I haven't lost that low-fi edginess you love, but I'm a lot easier to play with now.

You can also have a custom title now, just in case you didn't feel like I appreciated what made you unique as an individual.

I should also say
Haiku Dungeon's been revamped.
See what I did there?

Maybe you quit because you got sick of always adventuring above the water. I admit that seems unlikely, but I fixed that, too -- there are a bunch of underwater zones with new food, equipment, mechanics, and challenges.

And that's just the tip of the iceberg, trust me. I'm still the silly, clever, deceptively-complex game you fell in love with, only with about 95% more awesome.

So, I'm just sayin', if you can find it in your heart to give me another chance, I won't disappoint you.

If you don't drop by, I promise I won't bother you again. I just really felt like we deserved one more try.

Love,

The Kingdom of Loathing.
http://www.kingdomofloathing.com
Click to expand...

Ienzo · Feb 13, 2011

Well, that's an unusual Valentines email.

Don't do it, not until it's 100% more awesome.

Zter · Feb 13, 2011

Didn't read all of it, but if it sucked then don't waste your time. If it was decent, don't anyway. Let him suffer.

Tikem · Feb 13, 2011

I wonder why you got that... I didn't get one during my 6 month absence. But that's got to be an old one, it's 200% more awesome nowadays. If you decide to join, I'll make sure you get an extra Meat or two. I'll even send my food to you, an Oxygenarian has no need for such pittance as food or booze.

rikusorakairiown · Feb 13, 2011

... Dear Lord those guys are amazing.

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I'm being guilt-tripped into playing an MMORPG

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