I can't stop lying

I keep hiding behind white lies for my own twisted ideal of protection and now I can't stop. I need help before I forget who I am and have an identity crisis.

 

You lie for protection? That seems like a natural instinct, but how, to who, and when are you lieing?

 

Horrible cycle.It can ruin your life, so STOP IT.
You are sinking down to a horrible level in which..if you don't tell the truth eventually you will explode and be a giant truth ball.And if it doesn't get to you.IT WILL.Through the people you lied too.
SO cut it out, before it gets worse.

 

You say that you tell some white lies to basically protect yourself. That is not that uncommon, and probably some of the people you seek to protect yourself from also use some white lies here and there. It's an ugly pattern to get caught in, but so many people, in school especially, find themselves telling fibs here and there to build themselves up. Acceptance is sought out in school because of the harsh way some people are and they can be so opinionated. The opinions of some brats basically at times seems to matter more than it should, which also gives them a sort of power over you.

What I'd suggest to you is to think on why you tell these white lies in the first place. You've already done some thinking on it, but really ponder it out. Who are you trying to impress? Who are you trying to fit in with? What sorts of lies do you feel compelled to tell to protect yourself and not appear as a loser?

Next, ask yourself why you feel these people's opinions matter so much to you. Understand that although some of these people feel like they are 'important' now and can make or break you, they are not always going to be there in your life. Most of these others around you, you won't really even see later after you leave school. You will move on. Maybe your life feels rather dull to others around you, but often we will think our own lives are considerably boring compared to others' lives. They may be able to do things we cannot such as going to a concert, going out to parties etc, while parents may not appreciate you doing so. So the inclination to tell a little white lie that you did something you did not to appear to fit in to that social group of friends you have does become appealing.

The biggest thing is to have self-confidence and get to know yourself better. Maybe you can't do some things others do, but that does not make you a loser. It may even actually be something that saves your life in the end. Try to examine yourself and recognize the lies for what they are. Put them to the side and think on who you are and who you actually want to be. Start working on that agenda so that you can begin to mold yourself in the direction you want to go for when the school years are over. If you work on building yourself up for later, you won't be inclined to tell white lies to fit in with others because you have a plan that goes beyond this stuff. If people around you seem so cool, also realize that a good percentage of them probably also tell white lies and aren't so honest with themselves. Be different and try to feel better about yourself. Get to know the real you and you will be more proud and not feel the urge to lie. You may feel you aren't so exciting but if you give yourself plans and goals, then your life will have more meaning and direction, and you won't be held down. There also won't be a need to cover for yourself as though you have nothing going on, because you will be making things happen for yourself.

I hope this helps and that you feel better about things. Maybe you can explain more perhaps on some of the lies you have told and why you said them when you did and we can investigate it more. But truly think on yourself and explore your own mind and that around you. Find what you like to study, do in your free time, and what your goals are. Then you'll have more to talk about that is real, even if you seem held back in other ways. Good luck!

 

dude...

just think to yourself... can you realy trust yourself if you lie all the time

 

Aw man.. I know exactly how you feel.. and one point in my life all that seemed to come out of my mouth was lies. It started of small, telling little fibs every now and then, but in the end it was as if I had built up a whole second life for me and I kept getting caught out by unsuspecting people. It was an endless struggle to keep the truth hidden or be found out to be a liar. Seriously, its just gonna get worse. Luckily for me I had a second chance when we moved and now only the odd lie or too comes out.

Next time you go to say something you know isn't true, just stop yourself and think about it. Its only gonna come back and bite you in the future. Its a viscious circle.

 

I way to control that is to say the lie, then go back and say "but really, I'm kidding." I do it all the time... it's much better than simply lying all the time.

What things are being asked/said to you that make you want to lie? I think that might have something to do with it.

 

What exactly are you lying about?
I know what you mean...It's really horrible. You get caught up in it and it seems like you have to keep lying to cover up the 'small little white lie'. But you kind of have to MAKE yourself stop. If you start, just shake your head and tell the truth. It's almost like a trance. Just try to stay aware of what you're lying about and change it. If you've already started a huge chain of lies that you can't get out of, you may just want to come clean and start over. I hope you feel better and I hope I could help. <3 ​

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If you get any time alone keep saying the truth to yourself in the end When somebody asks you whatever it is you'vebeenlying out due to the repetition you will KNOW to just autoatically say the truth. I sure hope that helped because I really can't think of anything else...Sorry.

 

Lying isn't going to help. Well, I know the feeling, but STOP. It will tell back on you one day. Remember, the lie hurts more that the truth.

 

admit to whomever it is youre lying to and they can help you stop

 

Thanks for trying but no offence all your help wasn't helpful at all and half of it wasn't even help it was just STOP LYING which is kinda pointless to say. DOn't take this the wrong way.

 

well... we can hardly tell you to continue lying |: It will only make youe life worse. And Im sure in your heart you know you have to stop. Otherwise it'll eat away at you.

 

I hate to say it but the only way to stop this lying cycle is to go to all of the people you lied to and tell them the truth. If you catch you're self lying then tell the person that you were kidding and tell the truth.

And if they can't accept the truth then they aren't your friends. The worst they should be angry at you for is lying anything else and that's their problem.

 

Um...Sorry? I got it! Why not tell people you trust (Friends, family those sort of people) About it and they will help you stop.

 

Ya know, you didn't answer anyone's questions either. xD If you want help, you have to also respond to us and not just say that people's advice didn't aid you. I do see the point you are making that some people simply said 'stop lying' which well, doesn't help, but if you do want some assistance, please answer some of the questions some of us asked you who were more willing to go in depth with the matter.

 

I got into a fight with my very best friend in the whole wide world because I lied to her alot.
It turned out that I was hurting the people I held dearest to me.
So then I stopped.
Everything got better so fast.
You've got to stop, because it can ruin your life.
It almost did to me.
EDIT:But remember this: When you get bit by a snake, you're supposed to suck out the poisen.
So suck out all the poisen in your life and go admit your wrongdoing.
Weird way of putting it, but true!

 

GET OVER IT!!!!!!!!

lying is so overrated. why lie? the truth is so much more fun. watch them squirm in their seat. so what you end up with a black eye, they'd have two. :D

 

Ah, I had this problem when I was little. You're probably afraid of how the reaction of others will be when you tell them the truth. Just tell them the truth, it's for the better.

 

If you lie too much, soon you'll start to believe them yourself :[
I used to lie alot, but I realized how bad, or, how troubled I was starting to feel because I didn't know who I rly was...
So i stopped. Now my life is better^^
And I have more friends :]
And I get better grades... but idk what that has to do with it, lol