I'll keep this brief due to certain members who I know would rather be bothered to read this. Plus I would rather not give out details. I just lost the best thing in my life about a week ago. I'm still not able to get over it, and I'm miserable. Quite frankly, I'm ok with staying depressed about this, since I don't thinik I even want to be happy right now. What I do want though is a way to get over this though. Basically, I'm asking for advise on how to get over things. Losing a loved one. Break ups. Being betrayed. You name it, if you have had the experience to know how to get over something, then I would like to hear it please. ANd for all of those who want to say "Just give it time", that's a very obvious thing. If I can't get good advise from here, then that is what I'll do, but until then, I would prefer any other advise please. Thank you.
To be honest love time really is one of the best healers. You don't ever really get over the pain of being betrayed, but it does lessen a massive amount over time. However there are other things you can do to help, for one thing dwelling on the events and choosing to remain miserable won't help you at all. Go hang out with your friends, watch movies eat junk food, go have fun. Whenever I am really down the writing helps, or gaming. There is a whole ton of **** you can do to distract yourself and occupy your time and your mind. The best thing you can do to get over it, is accept it. Accept it and let it go.
Time is what can also destroy it because you can look at Edgar Allen Poe for example so write out your feelings
Well it always helps me to talk about it and know that the spirit of the lost one is happy and in a better world...However the pain'll never go away...just try talking about it... and letting time pass
Unfortunately as CtR has said, Time is the best healer and because of what you've said i can relate so all i can give you in advise is to think on it and except it. you'll be a better person for it even if the concept sucks now. Thinking on these things helps you grow and understand whats happening.
In the end, all you can really do is try to come to terms with things and realize what happened, happened. Break ups, people stabbing each other in the backs, losing someone we cared about due to such.. it sucks but as much as it hurts, it is better to find out early that the person is just not 'the one' for you. There will be better later on. Accepting that the person is just not the right one is the best way I've found to making peace with it and letting the person go and to coping with the negative emotions such things evoke. I try to remember the better times I had with the person, but also I recall the reason I cannot let myself be stupid and keep caring the same way I did. Whether with a good friend or a girlfriend, I just have to know that sometimes people are better let to move on and there will be better people out there for me to associate and be close to who won't take things for granted. As I cope with the feelings, I try to do other things with other people that matter in life. A girlfriend is just one aspect to life and when young, relationships come and go often. Seldom does someone find the right person to want to spend a long time with when you are a teenager. People change dramatically with likes, dislikes, obsessions, cares and commitment between even adults vary and age is not a real indicator. However, many teens think that a relationship should be so serious and so it hurts dramatically when breakups happen because many others don't take it that way. Sadly, you have learned a lesson the hard way but it will prepare you to know what to look out for in the future if you were hurt because it wasn't just a straight up break up. There are people like that and it is best to avoid them. See the signs for what they are. There are great people out there too, that I'm sure you'll come to meet. As others said, time is a healer, but it is also meant to help us learn. Relationships are always a tricky thing when breakups happen and maybe down the road you will see things both of you could have done better or that the other person was just not straight out speaking with you and instead chose to do something very foolish. It's her loss in the end that she gave up something good and true. Try to not be too hard on yourself and the pain you feel shows you are a good person. You'll find someone else who is more like you in that regard and in other ways, sometime. Let your heart heal and do some other things in life that mean things to you. If nothing else means something to you, it is a good time to find other meaningful things in your life to do because no one should just be dependent on a relationship as their only joy in life. Give it a go and I wish you well and hope you feel better soon.
