Well i haven't been feeling right for the past couple weeks so if you haven't gotten a reply that's why. My anti depressants don't seem to work anymore and i can't take a higher dose lexapro due to my size. So i've been really depressed lately which is why i've got more dark poetry on my poetry thread. The thing is i've been having suicidal thoughts and i'm also obssesed with my work as a dark poet so i've been watching the saddest stuff i can find. I might be addicted to making myself sad because i noticed the sadder i am the better poetry i write and i also write more. Is there anything that might break my addiction. We can't afford another electroid treatment.
Find someone or something you can't help but be happy about, and think about it constantly, its the only thing that keeps me from going to a hospital and getting a med other than we have no cash extra each month, and the fact that i'm under 18 and would prolly kill myself with meds anyway
The only advice I can give you is to get your priorities straight. Read "Diary, a novel" by Palahniuk to know exactly what I mean: an outburst of creativity doesn't make the sacrifices worthwhile. Your sadness has effect on other people; you said yourself that you don't reply to others as often anymore. Now think of the flipside: the better poetry portfolio. Why is it necessary to write better or more poetry? To put it bluntly: who gives a flying **** about poets? I am a poet myself but I can think of compliments I'd rather get than "minstrel of the word". Think about it. There are deeds aplenty that'll put you on the map, and many don't require you to put yourself through pain.
~hug very very tightly~ that is so so sad pleaze be happy not only you suffer your friends suffer as well. People will miss you so much so pleaze break ur addiction pleaze i know i would be sad if anything happend to you :(.
