dane cook

RAWR, i'm in love with this sexy beast. he's my favorite comedian.

 

Yeah, hes funny as hell! I liked his "Crappy Jobs" gig the best xD

 

"Welcome to BurgerKing may I have your order?" "WHOPPER!!!!" "Wait a minute sir I'm bleeding from the ears here what do you want?" "WHOPPER, NO ONION, LARGE FRY!!!" LOL that was funny.

 

Ohhh, I love this guy. xD Dane Cook is one silly *****.

The reason why he's so funny is because I can almost always relate to what he's saying!

 

thats what all his jokes are composed of, and thats why many critics like to flame him.......

he's a great comedian though don't get me wrong, but he really needs to get some new material, he's been saying the same stuff for how longs it been, 5 years already?



btw when a friend of mine gave me the first CD of dane cook i was like this>>>
'wtf, i made up half of these jokes years ago! i want ma' credit >.<'
true story, not lying, dane cook stole ma' jokes and i want ma' moneys......

 

His "vicious circle" show in front of 18 000 people is by far one of his best! You're missing out if you haven't seen it!!
Guy - *sneezes*
Dane cook- God bless you
Guy - um ya. I'm an atheist
Dane's aside - What am I supposed to say when an atheist sneezes? Uhhh "when you die nothing happens."

 

AHAHA THE LUMBER JACK STOMPING THROUGH THE WOODS CHOPS HIM DOWN AND PRINTS THE BIBLE ON HIM. i was crying by the end of that.

 

seriously...my whole floor got together one night, sat in the room with the largest TV we could find, and just laughed like crazy.
"dude...I hear a car"
"ummm..ya. The world is full of them. You're going to hear a lot of cars for the rest of your life. If you hear a humpback whale, that's weird, tell me that."

 

Dane Cook ish so hot x3 I make KH parodys of him xDD

 

One of my favorites is one of the deleted scenes from Vicious Circle. It's called "My Son, Optimus Prime" on the DVD.

"I wanna have 19 kids, and I'm gonna name a group of them after my favorite cartoon characters as a kid."
*Makes up a scenerio*
"Come here Optimus Prime! Sit down next to Megatron! And where is Gem? She is truely truely outragious!"

funny stuff.

 

Oh, my, I am gonna have to agree. I like 'Not So Kool-Aid'.

"Don't touch me, you giant beverage!"

 

I love Dane Cook, he's freekin hilarious!
Dane as a fireman:

Woman: "My husband screaming inside!"
Dane: "Well that's probably because he's on fire..."

he's so blunt with his answers, it's awsome!