Can we ever be just friends?

Unless the search results lied to me, this hasn't been made yet.

Anyways, a lot of people believe in soul mates, or that one person that is perfect for you, in matters of love, of course. Is it possible to have someone of the opposite sex (or whichever sex you're attracted to, depending on your orientation) as the perfect friend?

It's that age old question, "Can boys and girls ever be just friends?"
I used to think no, that no matter how close you were, there would almost always be a small wanting for more. It's normal to want a relationship with someone who can be that close to you.
But recently, I found out otherwise. I'll spare you the long story, and will just ask again:
Can guys and girls ever be just friends?

And is there such a thing as the perfect best friend?

Can the opposite sex be that perfect friend?

 

1.) If they both are single and straight, plus at least one of them thinks the other one is attractive: Definetily not.

2.) If one is hot and one is ugly: Yes, they can! But eventually the ugly one don't want to be just friends.

3.) If both are ugly: Same as 1.)

4.) Each rule has exceptions, so it may be possible for persons mentioned in 1.) and 3.) to be friends. But this would be so rare that the chance is near unexistent.

 

Given that physical attraction alone can be overcome rather easily, I regret to inform you that your plea makes no sense.
Physical attraction is sometimes underestimated but it's definitely not the only factor that weighs through. As a matter of fact when you get to know eachother better it'll count for less and less.

 

Are you talking about friendship? If other one is hot and both are singles, then the friendship is already over. Where do you think the saying 'just friends' comes from? Prove me wrong!

 

I'm going to have to agree with Styx.
Besides coming out extremely shallow, your argument makes no sense.
The story I was talking about is that my best friend is extremely gorgeous, Probably one of the best looking girls I've ever seen. Now I don't think I'm too bad looking myself and yet we are perfect as friends.

 

LOL. Why you do not lust her then? At least you are accepting her good looks.

As for my own experiences, as they seem to matter, I have experience on a opposite thing. Dude and girl were so good friends that it appeared almost as if the guy was homosexual. But eventually the guy told me and I kinda busted him, because what he did to the girl was disgusting I think. I mean making her believe they are best friends, but in reality the guy lusted the girl.

 

Four main reasons why two hot singles will and can remain friends:
1. They don't want a relationship.
2. They know all too well that they're too different and that a relationship wouldn't work out.
3. They don't have that gut feeling called "love" stirring inside them.
4. The ugly one is blind.

For the record, that last one is rather a sneer at your shallow rationale than anything else. The saying "just friends" stems from the fact that there is no attraction between the two. You obviously lack experience in this or you would have known that attraction includes more than physical attractiveness alone. That is of course if you're not 100% governed by pheromones.

 

Heh, well the funny thing is that I kind of have a friend like that, a perfect friend that is. We mostly treat each other like brother and sister and we're always there for each other, but we don't ever think about going higher than that. For one thing, he's fourteen, I'm seventeen. He has a girlfriend, and I tease him about that all the time like a big sister should. XD
So it is possible to have a perfect friend, I guess. The world is getting so weird about pefect friends lately, you think that a guy and a girl who hang out with each other all the time are boyfriend and girlfriend, which half of the time isn't true at all. :\

 

I sense hypocrites in this topic.

And the worst thing is that I must be 'on pheromones' to think like I do! Which is disagreeing with your view on the subject!

"We"? Yeah, right! You know perfectly well, what that 'brother' of yours is thinking. How sweet!

 

Why don't we stop the half-baked attempts at deliberate word-twisting as debate like adults?
I said that if you're not 100% on pheromones you'd understand that there is more to attraction than physical attraction. I said no more than that and I didn't contradict myself at all (but for a laugh, feel free to try and point out where I did).
I gave you three good reasons why looks alone don't cut it. Apparently you didn't bother to formulate a retort so I'll assume you don't have one. This would be a perfect time for you to admit your wrong with your dignity intact.

 

Dude, you obviously don't know the same person that I know. B| Just saying. You have your opinions about this topic as well as me. I see things differently from you, so that's that.
There's nothing wrong about the opposite being a brother/sister like person to you. It's actually good to have a "sibling" that's not part of your family, and that, to me, qualifies as a perfect friend.

 

I did not question it. I dislike you talking for both by using 'we'.

As for Styx. Im not wrong, you are not wrong. You just see only the exceptions that I mentioned in '4.)'

 

No, you are wrong because those "exceptions" are much more frequent than you think they are. There may be a period in someone's life when attraction means little more than chasing skirts, but rest assured that a great number of people grow out of that stage, many members here among them.

 

Hey, for all you know they might have discussed it.


I think at adolesence there aren't many "platonic" friends who don't have even the slightest feelings of lust for each other, mainly because there are so many hormones flying around at this age. (oops, was that a double negative? :v)

I do think it is possible, though. Even if both were physically attractive and single, one could find the other to have annoying habits or to do things that they find generally unattractive. Just because two people are "hot" doesn't mean they'll automatically want to bang each other.

 

Seems like you have decided and continue to bash the opposite opinion. This obviously makes me uninterested to come back to this topic. Keep your silly views on your pure friendships. What was the point of this topic again when you do not allow opposite opinions to have truth in them? Your silly friendships are destined to fall for all I care! That'd be if I was using the same bashing methods as you are.

As I said I aknowledge the rare exceptions. It doesn't mean anything if friends say to each other that they'll be just friends. Allow me to introduce you to lies...

 

Actually, if you read my post I didn't bash your ideas. I even "supported" it, when I said about the platonic situation being rare in teenage years.

Somebody got out of the wrong side of bed this morning.

 

But of course the answer varies for different people...My best friend is the oposite sex and I've never had a serious argument so I guess the answers are yes despite loving the girl beyond everything I'm fine that she's happy she knows I'm happy just loving her we're friends.

 

Ooookay quick life lesson here.
If someone disagrees with what you say, THEY ARE NOT BASHING YOUR OPINION.

Oh by the way jackass, I have several guy friends, all of whom I've known for quite a few years, and all of which I knew before I started dating and have never tried to make a move on me, and vice versa.

Everyone is different. People have different ways of interacting with others, including friendships. Some might find it hard to be friends with the opposite sex and not feel any attraction, while others, like me, have no problem with it at all.

 

Pot kettle black etc.
I'm not really bashing you; I'm making my point in a less-than-friendly way. The line's thin at times but there is a difference.

For the umpteenth time, being attracted to someone generally goes beyond the physical aspect alone. You can find someone hot and still don't want to go beyond friendship. That's actually rather common; they're nowhere near exceptional.
Of course not everyone speaks the truth when they say they just want to be friends but even then it doesn't mean the end of the friendship.
I believe that the exceptions are what you call the rule. The majority of the people here will agree with me. Are they all lying or ignorant then? You're still young; you'll learn.

 

You should tell some facts:
1.) Are your friends single?
2.) Are you possibly ugly?
3.) Do they have any chance to get you?

They can still lust you, even if they are not making a move. Just pointing out that your friends might lust you, but you would not have any idea! Please tell me you agree on this possibility and we are fine.