So, heres my dilemma. In the past I have gotten a lot of trouble with other people criticizing what I wear and the music I listen to. Quite frankly I don't mind being different from everyone else, but it does get kind of lonely. Considering I have like a couple of real friends. It does bug me how everyone judges me based on what I listen to or what I wear. To make matters worse, this school that I am going to attend has no one that looks relatable. My dad is also trying to change my music and the clothes I wear. I have been raised to learn that no one can change me. Well, now my dad is trying to change me. Its really frusturating and I feel that no one can accept me for me. Everyone expects an image from me that I don't want to conform to. I need help but theres really no out there that'll understand. I've kept this in long enough. Is there anyone out there who can help me. Or give me some ideas. Anything. I don't care if you criticize me. I just want the truth. . .
Truth is, people are always going to criticize and judge. That ain't gonna change, honey. Right now, you're into these things. And that's you're business. At sometime, you might be into other things. Don't conform if you don't want to, but you just gotta take those things in stride. You should also sit down with your dad and talk. Tell him you don't want to change, but maybe ask for help finding at least one other person who has the same interests as you.
God, I remember when I had this problem... What you should do is take what people say in stride. If they try to change you, don't let them. It'll always happen, wether it's a friend, a teacher, or a boss. People won't let it go, and all that should matter is wether or not YOU want to change yourself. As for your dad, ask him why he tries to change you. Give him a chance and don't argue. Talk about it calmly and carefully. You know we all got your back. We're fine with the way you are. Don't let anyone turn you into something you aren't.
I think Rainshine said it best, but I'll give my own 2cents. I've been in similar situations before, where I'd be ridiculed for the kind of music I like, or the kinds of things I like to do. I usually ignored it, but there were times when it did get to me. Over time, I realized that they were just being overly judgmental. There was/is nothing wrong with what I'm doing. Obviously if what you were doing was causing harm or discomfort to others, then you may want to consider changing, but you're not doing anything like that. As for your dad trying to change you, all I can say is talk to him. Tell him that you like the things you like because that's who you are. Don't apologize for it, because you've got nothing to apologize for. I'm sure that if he hears that from you, he'll be more willing to accept you for who you are. I hope my advice helped. There's no escaping criticism from others, so just learning how to ignore nonconstructive criticism will certainly help. It did for me.
i get judged a lot by some of my cousins, they get really sensitive i if i talk about them in bad way well anyway you should talk to your dad about it, who you are is who are you and you dont want to change,everyone is different no one is the same.
I see and understand all that you are saying. I have talked to my dad. On several accounts actually, but every conversation we have, it always ends into an arguement. All my dad says is ; "I'm the parent, your the child, what I say goes." And I just want him to let me be. You guys say this is a phase or whatever and that I may grow out of it. Well, I even asked him if he would just let me grow out of it on my own. The problem is, is that he just won't listen. Its not as easy as talking to him. . .
It difficult to talk to my mom about stuff like this too. I usually end up getting into the same debate with my aunt about how I should stay at home more which lead to me saying something along the lines of Unless you change, I'm not going to. My Mom does try to solve this problem but she can't get to the root of it. What I'm trying to say it to always bee yourself no matter who tries to change you.
Welcome to the wonderful world of being a teenager. This is normal. Always be true to yourself and let the haters hate. Focus your time on grades and become a high-school success story (maybe join a club or two). Go to college where you'll meet endless people you can relate too. Don't worry, you'll be fine.
