A fairly good story I wrote for my Creative Writing Class

Discussion in 'Archives' started by sora_i_can_do_this, May 1, 2008.

  1. sora_i_can_do_this Traverse Town Homebody

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    This is a story I wrote for my Creative Writing Class, it's pretty good but i must warn you there are a lot of spelling errors

    tell me what you think

    We Are Amily

    The Fargos are far from your average, ordinary family. Mr. Fargo is a middle aged man with a 7th grade education. It’s not that his parents couldn’t afford schooling or he was dumb or anything like that. It’s simply that he refused to enter 8th grade because he didn’t want to graduate. His explanation is that he didn’t want to wear a gown because it made him look girly, and he didn’t want to become a cross dresser like his brother. Few people believe this story, particularly because Mr. Fargo was an only child. Mr. Fargo is currently employed at a factory that makes both glue and mayonnaise.
    Mrs. Fargo, previously Ms. Phillips, is a middle aged woman who is a poet, or so she claims. When in 4th grade she wrote a poem about her pet cat, Scruffles, and got an A+. Since then she claims she is a great poet, however she has not wrote a single poem since then due to the fear that she will never surpass her previous work. She met Mr. Fargo when they were both contestants on Jeopardy, neither one of them got any questions right, but they both fell in love nevertheless. It was a good day for the third contestant as well.
    They are proud parents of six children. Their oldest son, Jon, is 23 years old and is currently living in their basement. Jon is 6½ feet tall and has a Mohawk and is missing several teeth. He usually just wears one of his tie-dyed t-shirts and his underwear. Everyday, he has the same routine. He wakes up at noon and has a bowl of Cap’n Crunch and pours sugar on it. He’ll watch several episodes of The Jerry Springer Show; then watch the motion picture Napoleon Dynamite. He’ll then run upstairs and grab some food from the family dinner; and run down stairs as quickly as possible so he has to spend as little time with his family as possible. He’ll then play the videogame Dance Dance Revolution for three hours. After that, he’ll watch the motion picture Napoleon Dynamite for a second time, and then go to bed. His mom begs him to get a job, but he refuses to get a job until he’s done living life to its fullest.
    The twins, Julius and Vincent, are both seniors in high school. Julius is a walking encyclopedia. He has a photographic memory and studies 7 hours a day. He can tell you anything from Guy Oliver Nickalls, a British rower who competed in the 1920 and 1928 Summer Olympics to every single battle in World War II; he knows lots and lots and lots and lots of information. However Julius is afraid of girls. Not afraid as in too shy to talk to them, but instead he believes that all women are violent and are plotting to kill him.
    Vincent, on the other hand is very much intrigued by girls. He often tries to impress them with his knowledge. However, Vincent has ADD and can never stay focus in school. He is basically a walking Wikipedia, in other words he makes up information to impress people. He can tell you all about how the Canadians bombed Pearl Harbor and that we landed on Mars in 1969.
    Robert is a junior in high school. Robert suffers from claustrophobia, the fear of confined spaces. However, he’s always believed that it is best to face problems head on. Therefore, he sleeps standing up in his closet.
    Eli is the youngest child and the only daughter of Mr. And Mrs. Fargo. She is 4 years of age. She has one blue eye and one green eye, and at one point she one blue eye, one green eye, and pink eye. She often watches Teletubbies and Horror Films such as Hostel, Child’s Play, and many others. Strangely, she claims the scariest movie she’s ever seen was
    Monster’s Inc.
    The youngest son of the family is 14 year old Jeffrey. However they don’t call him Jeffrey. One day during the second grade Jeff accidentally blurted out the notorious “f wordâ€, you know which one I’m talking about. He later served a detention.
    Since then Jeffrey tried his hardest to avoid saying that bad word. So he never said or wrote the letter F or even a PH sound ever again. For example the sentence “Five foolish fools forgot their phone numbers†would become “Ive oolish ools orgot their one numbersâ€. However since he can’t say the F’s in his name he has since then gone by the name Jerey Argo.
    The Fargos also have 73 relatives. However this is a short story, not a novel so we’ll stick to those 8. Today is the first day of high school. “Kids, do you want waffles or French toast.†asked Mrs. Fargo. “I’ll have wales.†replied Jerey. Since, Mrs. Fargo was used to Jerey’s strange grammar; she immediately knew what he wanted. “Did you know that French toast is called pain perdu in France?†asked Julius. “Yeah, well, a waffle is called Le Waff in France.†replied Vincent. “No, they aren’t; you just made that up.†said Julius. “Oh, no Hilary Duff is sneaking up on you!†said Vincent. Julius then ran out the room screaming. “Quit scaring your brother.†scolded Mrs. Fargo.
    The first class Jerey had was Freshman English. “Alright class, my name is my Mr. Flame.†said Mr. Flame. “My class shouldn’t be too hard. Just follow the directions, and don’t turn in papers that look like they were written by drunk monkeys and you should be fine. Now for your first assignment describe your friends and family.â€
    Two days later, Mr. Flame was holding Jerey’s paper. “What is this?†asked Mr. Flame. “Uh….the paper I wrote.†replied Jerey. “Is the F on your keyboard broken?†questioned Mr. Flame. “No.†replied Jerey. “Then why was every single F taken away. I asked you to talk about your family not your amily whatever that is! And my name is certainly not Mr. LAME!†exclaimed Mr. Flame. “I know.†replied Jerey. “Then why didn’t you put any F’s on this paper?†asked Mr. Flame. “I never use that letter.†answered Jerey. “Well, until you start putting F’s on your paper; I’ll be putting my own F’s on your paper.†He then wrote a big fat red F on Jerey’s paper. Jerey was mad! He worked hard on that paper.
    It was dinner time. Jon had run upstairs, grabbed a burger, and ran back down stairs. He did this all without making eye contact and not saying one word to anyone. “How was school everyone?†asked Mrs. Fargo. “Pointless. I didn’t learn a single new thing.†replied Julius. “Well, today in biology, I learned about the deadly, British snake called the monty python.†said Vincent. “Monty python is not an animal!†replied Julius. “Britney Spears!†yelled Vincent. Julius then ran out of the room screaming. “For God’s sake, can’t you boys behave themselves? My brother and I never fought.†said Mr. Fargo. “Dad, you were an only child.†said Robert. Mr. Fargo just ignored his son’s comment and continued eating. “Can I have some more ries?†asked Jerey. “Sure, how was your day Jeff…um I mean Jerey?†said Mrs. Fargo. “Not too good. My English teacher gave me that letter between E and G on my paper.†replied Jerey. “That’s a shame. English was always my favorite subject. That’s where I began my love for poetry.†said Mrs. Fargo.
    The next English class, Mr. Flame said. “I want you all to write me a paper telling me what you do for fun, and remember spelling counts.†Mr. Flame gave a nasty look at Jerey. Later that night, Jerey wrote a paper that was 1,000 more words than what was required. He filled it with some of the best metaphors and similes ever written in a paper. Every single person, place, and thing were extremely well detailed. It was perhaps one of the best papers ever written with the exception that it didn’t contain the letter F at all.
    With the hopes that all the positive things about his paper would overlook the one negative thing, Jerey handed in his paper to Mr. Flame. Mr. Flame took one look at the first line, and put a big fat red F on it. “Now class, for your next paper. I want you to write about what you were like when you were four or five.†requested Mr. Flame. “Geez, how much homework is he gonna give us?†whispered an ugly blond boy whose underwear was showing. “I know he gives us way too much. Well, at least its easy. I got an A+ on the last one.†whispered a short kid with red hair. “Yeah, this is the easiest class ever to get an A in.†replied the first boy.
    The next class with a crooked grin on his face, Mr. Flame asked Jerey “May I see your paper?†“Go ahead†replied Jerey. Jerey pulled out a blank piece of paper. “Why didn’t you do it?†asked Mr. Flame. “Why bother?†replied Jerey. Mr. Flame then wrote a big fat red F on the paper. Jerey then wrote the letters “u, c, and k†next to the big fat red F, and the word “you†on the paper. He then shoved the paper in Mr. Flame’s face. Jerey then ran out of the room yelling “Uck you Mr. Lame!â€
    Later that day, Jerey, his parents, Mr. Flame, and the principal all met in the principal’s office. “Alright, Flame, this better be important. I’m a very busy man.†said the principal. “This boy here has no respect for me or human decency!†exclaimed Mr. Flame. “What did he do?†asked Mrs. Fargo. “He doesn’t use F’s at all! He shoved paper in my face! He said ‘uck you’ to me!†exclaimed Mr. Flame as his face began turning red. ‘Is that all?†replied Mr. Fargo who smiled slightly. “Wait…what?†replied the confused principal. “Our boy doesn’t use the letter F at all.†explained Mrs. Fargo. “Wait, you knew about this?†asked Mr. Flame. “Yeah, he’s been doing it for 7 years. Most teachers just learn to live with it. So quit your whining.†said Mr. Fargo. “But it’s not normal!†replied Mr. Flame. “Well, none of our kids are normal. Last night I watched Saw with my little girl, Eli. I vomited and she was laughing throughout the film. My other son, Vincent, thinks that the Eiffel Tower is in Mexico. Perhaps, it is better to not be normal. If being normal meansng a sad, little man who complains about anything out of the ordinary. For what makes us not normal is what makes us…who we are, and we should be proud of it!†said Mr. Fargo. “Well, all I know is that I’m sick of kids constantly dropping F bombs in my school. This kid is a breath a fresh air in my opinion. So, like they said. Learn to live with it and quit whining.†replied the principal. Mr. Flame then walked out of the room muttering to himself. “Let’s go home.†said Mrs. Fargo. “See you tomorrow Mr. Lame!†said Jerey as he waving.
     
  2. sora_i_can_do_this Traverse Town Homebody

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    Hey maybe if I make another post people will read this story

    Doubt it

    also, don't talk to yourself
     
  3. Maka Albarn It's called love

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    ooooooo.... it's interesting! Lol, I like it!
     
  4. Jiku Neon Kingdom Keeper

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    Interesting. I think that it's a rather well written work. Not really excellent but interesting and since I have a soft spot for short stories written for Creative Writing anyways... well you get it.