25 ways to ensure your virginity - some minor-explicit content

Inasuma · Jan 14, 2007

Watermelons...<3 at KHI said:

1. When she asks how she looks shrug and say, "Could be better." This will keep her on her toes, and girls love that.

2. Never hold her hand. This can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (Or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. This will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. Girls are like dogs. They love to be roughed up.

4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If she is, say "you better be" , repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. This will show her you care.

5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. This will pave the way for her own personal improvement. And every girl needs some improvement.

6. Recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. Then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. Because jewelry is for pussies and asian ladies.

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "F@%k you" and grab the other girls ***. Girls love competition.

8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because i can."

9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those special nicknames.

10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.

11. Warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say, "If you don't stop *****ing about the cold right now you're going to be *****ing about a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear.

12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the party is dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick the pet. I always find stuff like that funny. Why shouldn't girls?

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things, like video games.

15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

16. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her self confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way she'll go crazy.

18. Take her out to dinner. Right when shes about to order interrupt and say no shes not hungry. Make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her.

19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a spontaneous guy.

20. Give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it, but not a sexy cologne smell. A bad smell. You know what I'm talking about.

21. When its raining keep asking her if she's crying. She'll say no its just the rain. Ten minutes later turn to her and just scream at her to stop crying you @..%$ baby. Girls like a tough man as I've already stated.

22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

23. If youre listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This way she'll think you're mysterious.

24. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects arent important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just when ever, take it and tell her you love it. Then, next time you know she's coming over on a trash day leave the trash can open and have the present visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that much but I think it's funny.
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-----------------------------

Best.Thing.Ever.

22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.
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That is filled with epic win.

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things, like video games.
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Even more epic win. I oughta try that. =D

NOTE: This is not a thread for insults. Just jokes about the matter.

Axel · Jan 14, 2007

Lmfao...
12, 18 and 25 are funny...

Cody · Jan 14, 2007

Wow....this is so funny rotflol XD

AlexleHoshi · Jan 14, 2007

Dude that would work with me if I was like other girls but I'm not (Why does that make me think of Xigbar)

Guxas · Jan 14, 2007

OMFG... this is awfuuuuuuuuullll!!!!!! XDDDDDDD
nyaaaaaaa so meannnnnn!!!! xD

Jiηx · Jan 14, 2007

Dude those are so funny, although if I even did one of them I think I'd end up with a slap across the face, evil Darky! Trying to get people slapped :p

no-reality_allowed · Jan 14, 2007

7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words "F@%k you" and grab the other girls ***. Girls love competition.
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this one is just messed up xDDDD

8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because i can."
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i am soooo doing this someday.........

11. Warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say, "If you don't stop *****ing about the cold right now you're going to be *****ing about a black eye." The best way to get warm is with fear.
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i said that once...........never gonna do it again T-T

14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things, like video games.
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this one is brilliant, just brilliant xDDD

♥ M e w I c h i g o ♥ · Jan 14, 2007

omg what ****** thoughta that???
xDDDDDDDDDDD if he wuz srs, omg he wuz definetely dropped on his head when he wuz a baby
but that wuz soooooo funny!!!!!!! its just messed up xDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Mish · Jan 14, 2007

Oh so THAT'S why those guys were doing those things.. They wanted to ensure their virginity. It all makes sense now.

Darkandroid · Jan 14, 2007

You know that list failed, not one girl l............... *reads title again*

DAMN :p

Funny list XD good find.

Chad Thundercucc · Jan 14, 2007

I am soooo trying this everything on this list!! I may have to go throgh 20 girls to do all of this but still!:D :D Very amusing!

Cody · Jan 14, 2007

VideoGameNerd246 said: ↑

I am soooo trying this everything on this list!! I may have to go throgh 20 girls to do all of this but still!:D :D Very amusing!
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I might try this too...see if it works...

DarknessKingdom · Jan 15, 2007

lol. Great list, and good find.

It's genius though I wonder if anyone has ACTUALLY tried it :D

Axel · Jan 15, 2007

VideoGameNerd246 said: ↑

I am soooo trying this everything on this list!! I may have to go throgh 20 girls to do all of this but still!:D :D Very amusing!
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You might need a girl for each really.
Lucky me, I have not done any of those....wait...does that mean....o.O

AlexleHoshi · Jan 15, 2007

Axel said: ↑

You might need a girl for each really.
Lucky me, I have not done any of those....wait...does that mean....o.O
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Don't worry Axel who ever came up with that list didn't try the most simples way and that is just telling the girl he don't want it, but yeah if a boy tried any of that with me he'll get a black eye....or 25 one for each one he trys

Axel · Jan 15, 2007

Anniexo said: ↑

Don't worry Axel who ever came up with that list didn't try the most simples way and that is just telling the girl he don't want it, but yeah if a boy tried any of that with me he'll get a black eye....or 25 one for each one he trys
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Well the title does say 25 ways to ensure virginity...

EvilMan_89 · Jan 15, 2007

well, i like the one that says "tell her u like the gift but leave it visible in a trash can". i do that one all the time!

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25 ways to ensure your virginity - some minor-explicit content

Inasuma "pumpkin"

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Axel Chaser

Cody Chaser

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AlexleHoshi Dude called Alex

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Guxas Traverse Town Homebody

Jiηx You're such a loser.

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♥ M e w I c h i g o ♥ Twilight Town Denizen

Mish smiley day!

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Darkandroid Gets it Together

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Chad Thundercucc The dharma of valvu; the dream of a clatoris

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Cody Chaser

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DarknessKingdom The Kingpin of the TV

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Axel Chaser

AlexleHoshi Dude called Alex

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EvilMan_89 Code Master

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25 ways to ensure your virginity - *some minor-explicit content*

Inasuma "pumpkin"

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Axel Chaser

Cody Chaser

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AlexleHoshi Dude called Alex

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Guxas Traverse Town Homebody

Jiηx You're such a loser.

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no-reality_allowed Â¢ℓαιяνσуαηт ℓσνєкιℓℓ

♥ M e w I c h i g o ♥ Twilight Town Denizen

Mish smiley day!

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Darkandroid Gets it Together

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Chad Thundercucc The dharma of valvu; the dream of a clatoris

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Cody Chaser

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DarknessKingdom The Kingpin of the TV

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Axel Chaser

AlexleHoshi Dude called Alex

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Axel Chaser

EvilMan_89 Code Master

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25 ways to ensure your virginity - some minor-explicit content