yeah, thats me 8D hello again.
HEY GINTA :'D Its me Obsessed, remember?
Why the hell did I just watch Doctor and Rose saying goodbye on the beach? Now I seriously feel terrible :v
^ apparently? D: It is actually so good to be able to flick through threads again :v
You've made an excellent start here, I really look forward to reading more. Your writing flows pretty well and is very readable. I have a few comments to make though. Your description is generally good, but you must be careful not to use too many adjectives such as in the sentence above. Writing will then become "purple prose" which is a pain to read. Few odd mistakes. Should be a question mark in the latter. This just seemed to strike me as a really odd and random statement. o.O Also, how did she knows Jacob's name? I don't recall her learning it at any point. You've got pretty good character development so far, I look forward to the next chapter.
Spunk you are absolutely gorgeous! Especially that last picture, wow. <3
No, I'm afraid advertising isn't allowed here. ):
yaaay my wife :'D It's me Obsessed. Welcome back.
Ima wait up for you tonight ;-;
You pinky promised ;-;
xD Awkward
Um.. I won't comment on the part you put in at the end, since I cannot contribute and feel my opinions unnecessary. However, I shall review the poem. I'm going to guess that you did intentionally write "thy" throughout the piece and it was not a mispelling of "they". Very little (maybe even none) of the lines make sense, I'm afraid, as the word was used incorrectly. The only lines in exception to this are the first two- and even the second line had a spelling mistake. "Alrite" should be "alright". I can see you made a decent attempt with the presentation but often too many colors can look messy, so choose wisely.
I'm really sorry, I totally missed your post >> *re-merged* I assume you want to keep the title as it is now?
... I didn't even notice. xD Thanks though.
NO HE WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO USo
Hmmm. The epilogue tied everything off nicely but I wasn't very happy with the first part of the chapter (your first post). It didn't really make sense to me, and I wasn't particularly sure what was going on. I also think you weren't very realistic with Aido's character- he was far too willing to just give his life away. I like that Yuki became human again, I also like that Seiren and Kaname will stay together. Kaien's death was done well, it brought a few tears to my eyes. Congratulations on finishing the story, it was a pleasure to read. :3
Yeah, well, I miss you D:
I disagree, the highlight of my night was Dalk's kareoke. ;-;
why arent you ever on msn anymore? >:
Aww Dalk! :3
