Heroes of Olympus: The Lost Hero. After that is the newest one; Heroes of Olympus: The Son of Neptune.
Kamina approves.
All done. The critiques and everything. *takes off judge wig* Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go and drown this wig in a lake. *leaves to do so*
OOC: I tried to sum up this section in as short a manner as I could. I apologise for the slow posting. Uni and real life are hell at the moment. After the chiefs intervention, Kamina found most of Team Gurren (excluding Simon himself) betray him in a manner of which he called them, "Backstabbing bastards!" With them absolved of their 'crimes' all that was left for the chief to do was to free Simon. "This village needs diggers like you Simon, I know Kamina roped you into this. So you're free to go." "B-but I-" "It's okay Simon. Don't worry about it." Kamina told him calmly. That was when the chief turned his attention and abusive efforts towards Kamina himself. Despite being handcuffed and suffering the constant abuse that the chief yelled at him, Kamina still refused to back down about his beliefs of a surface existing. It made Simon even believe that Kamina couldn't be lying... the aura of confidence that Kamina emitted just radiated through the air and made Simon believe too. "Oh yeah! Well how do you know of this surface then?! You're a liar just like your father!" The chief yelled, spit flying out of his mouth. "He isn't a liar! I've been to the surface ya dumbass! With my Dad!" "Then why aren't you there now if you got there before?" "Tch..." "See?! You're a liar just like he was, spouting this bull about there being a surface!" "Why are you so scared old geezer?!" "Scared! It's about time I teach you some respe-" Just as the chief was about to hit Kamina with the sheath of his sword again, suddenly everything started shaking like crazy. "It's another Earthquake!" Someone yelled as everyone cowered and looked for places to hide. "Bro! we gotta get out of here!" Simon yelled in fear. "No..." Kamina muttered through grit teeth. "I don't run away from anything..." Simon looked on at him in shock, tears almost in his eyes... "But if we don't get out of here! We'll die! I don't wanna lose anyone els-" Suddenly Kamina pulled him into a hug. "I'm sorry... I forgot..." he said softly, recalling how Simon's parents had died in a rockfall caused by an earthquake many years previous. "It's nearly over now..." he stood there holding Simon as the shaking died down. "See that! We have to live in fear day after day from these constant earthquakes! Up on the surface we wouldn't have to be scared! We wouldn't have a ceiling! All we'd have is a big blue sky!" Kamina shouted out with confidence to everyone in the village. "Enough of this garbage!" The chief yelled from his hiding place. "Those who cause trouble can miss dinner. You'll be spending tonight in confinement Kamina!"
Kurisu walked with Storm, joining the ranks of the other Choosen just before the fighting clan guy started talking. "Fancy speech... boy do I feel motivated." he muttered sarcastically once their teacher had finished what he was saying. "Kurisu! Show some respect." Gwen said in a shocked manner from his shoulder. Kurisu sighed. "Fighting clan guys are only good at punching things. How are we supposed to train in our own styles if we're all training under one banner when each of us have our own thing to offer?" he revealed his thoughts to his helper and anyone else in earshot. "Well... still... you shouldn't say something so rude." "It's not rude if it is an honest opinion." he pointed out and puffed out a few more smoke rings into the air and watched them rise into the sky before dispersing lazily, as was his usual habit of something to do.
That should so go in Bueno's signature. XD Shame he doesn't have room. :P
I got you covered. XD
D'aww... such a poet. XD
Right guys! Make way for the judging! *puts on the white wig* ...Wrong type of judging? Okay, but I'm keeping the wig. Spoiler: Terra254 Right. First of all, I want to tell you that this post impressed me compared to what I've seen from you before. so I know that you worked hard on this. I've got a few things to address though. You need to utilize the space key after full-stops and commas and such. I am aware of your circumstances, but even basic punctuation rules are required here, so this is just me telling you to keep on trying 'cause I am definitely seeing a vast improvement from your old posts. Another thing I'd like to point out is changing the size of the font. It's not really a nice thing visually to do to have so many different font sizes. I'd say use a smaller font if you want to show whispering, but other times I personally would advise against it unless you're keeping the entire post in a small font. Essentially, use font size for a reason. As for some good points, I loved the characterisation between the two of your characters. It was pretty strong in places, so should you get through the the next rounds. Keep that up. XD Also, I want to commend you on being the first to post in season two, so well done there. Spoiler: FKB Right, FKB! You are making life difficult here... as judges we've been told that we have to write at least 2 paragraphs or so, but with your post. It is extremely difficult to as I really can't fault it all that much. I loved the use of humour in this and the setting really worked well despite the extremely odd situation you were given. The only thing I would say that might help is try experimenting with colours. I can't fault anything you did, but I have to say if you colourised when characters were speaking (or used bold, or something else perhaps), that would have made things a little more clear for me. But that is personal preference on my part. Over all, well done. I can see you in this competition for a long time. Spoiler: Britishism Britishism my boy! First of all, I want to say well done for being honest. Honesty goes a long way, you can rest assured of that. Now... I loved the layout of what you posted. The paragraphs were nice and everything was fairly neat. Although, I don't know if I like this thing: -- ://: -- It's not needed. If you want to separate anything. A simple paragraph gap using the enter key will do, or if you really want something. Use this: ~ Or anything else to that effect. It is simple and to the point. Sometimes I found the way you colour coded things to be a bit confusing. But I'm tired as I write this, so that may just be my slow brain. Other than that, again, you're making my life difficult in that I can't find much else to say. I'll risk repeating myself though and say again that I loved the characterisation in this post. I also like that you've gone with a unique option of Father and Daughter as we didn't see that last season. And I loved the way you chose to end things in this post as you truly did address the issue at hand in this challenge. So, over all. I think you'll also be someone to contend with. Spoiler: Midnight Star Ah Midnight mi'dear. I loved this post for the fact it wasn't long, but it didn't need to be. Not that length of a post is a problem when Role-Playing. But I loved the style you employed. It got to the point fairly quickly, reached a sense of climax, but then left it with somewhere to go like for if you (like in a normal role-play but not this competition) were going to post again as a follow up. Sometimes people trap themselves by finishing their 'part' early and then having nothing to post until everyone else moves on. So I loved the opening you made for yourself. You had a good clear crisp layout and I could always tell which character was which thanks to use of colour, and thanks to the boldness used in the speech parts of text. I could tell really clearly when they were talking and when they were acting as well as who etc. You kept true to the challenge and therefore I have to say: Well done basically. XD Spoiler: Maka (cause I am not using that confusing long name of yours. XD) I want to use this expression with your post. "Long post was long... But awesome!" You had some amazing humour and characterisation in this. Like seriously. Wow. Everything was clearly set out for the same reasons I said with Midnight's post. And... holy cow, you have some unique plans XD I was laughing my ass off when I was imagining that viking sliding about everywhere. I especially loved the end of how they escaped from the frying pan and into the fire, so to speak. You addressed what we required in this challenge and you did it fabulously. I can tell you worked very hard on this post. Keep this up and you'll definitely be hard to beat. ;) Spoiler: Master of Keyblades The biggest thing I noticed was the change in past tense to present tense at the end. You need to watch out for that, it's an easy fix, but you have to absolutely be careful when writing something to not let your tenses switch unless it is intentional. (although, why it would ever be intentional, I do not know lol) I'm not even sure as to why you changed it at the end unless it was an accident. The example: EDIT: Nevermind that, I just remembered... S is next to D on the keyboard, so I'm gonna judge that as a typo, and not a change of tense. In that case, I will say... proof read. O_O XD ~ Anyway, the layout of this was good and clear. Although, I'd like to suggest as with about that you use a different colour, or at least use bold for speech as it just makes things clearer. Ultimately it's not a big deal as that is what speech marks are for of course, but I just prefer it as it is another visual clue and allows me to quickly realise 'oh that person is talking' instead of me having to look back and check for speech marks I may have missed. lol I like how you ended it, although I felt I wanted a bit more... I mean. They were safe yeah, but other than Kiza saying: "After everything that’s happened today, I can’t wait till we get out of this place.” I didn't believe that they had just defied death. I mean, think about it, if you had just been chased by some huge crazy murdering Viking. Wouldn't you be more freaked out too? But alas, I did like this post. Well done. Spoiler: Marushi I feel your pain Marushi. That has happened to me before, but well done for doing it all again and doing a fine job if I do say so myself. XD So for that, you get an 'A' for effort. First of all... I want to tell you that I love you for using colour for speech! XD It made things so clear. I had a breeze reading this. You did have a rather big chunk of text in the middle, but I don't think it mattered personally. Some may have split that a little bit, but I think that there wasn't much need really. You had some really strong characters too. Sticking to their unique traits perfectly. So I commend you for that. You were creative in your approach and you addressed the challenge as was needed. ...I just have one problem I spotted. You editted your post 2 days or so after making it which is against the rules. That, as has been pointed out is a bad, bad, bad thing. >:L Okay. I'm exaggerating slightly. :P But it's still a big rule that must be followed in this competition. Next time if you are going to edit (although, you shouldn't need to). At least leave a reason in the edit box so we know what you did. Other than that, as I said. Well done. XD Spoiler: P-ness GRAPHICS GET YOU FAR! but not here... XD (sorry, no extra points for those :P) *cough* Let me begin the critique! "KHV-tan is one of the most cutest adorable things I have ever seen!" *coughs again* Now that is out of the way. *truly begins* Yes, she is cute, despite having been unconscious for most of it which is a unique way to have your character played.However... personally, I'd have liked to have seen more of her and cause I didn't get to, I feel saddened. Um... this post is actually hard to comment on. I can't fault you in terms of grammar or layout or anything like that. As for what was good about this post, well it all was pretty much great. But yeah, I must express that you need to be careful. When asked to use both of your characters in a challenge, try to use both of them a good amount. I don't think you utilized KHV-tan enough. :/ However, you were very creative in your approach and put a lot of effort into this. So well done there. Overall, I think you could be a major dark horse in this competition. Just be careful not to limit yourself, or you may find yourself in trouble later. As for Tummer, Fuzzy and Ace. You guys aren't good enough for my critique! .... .. ... .. ...... . ... .. . Okay, you are. XD It's just due to time difference here, I have to get up for uni in a few hours. So I promise to edit the rest of you guys in tomorrow once I get home from Uni. Until then, I hope everyone can use what I've said. I must say, I'm pleasantly surprised to see such strong posts in the first round already. This competition is going to be a tough one to judge. EDIT: The rest of them, I do apologise about the severe delays. Uni and real life are a pain in my ass. :/ Anyways... Spoiler: The tummy Tummer. You my friend made a very clear post. I could tell who was talking and when and everything, the paragraphs were all nice, so you get an A+ for the layout. You addressed the issues of the challenge and put a lot of work into this post, so I commend you for a job well done. The only thing was a few typos like so: Many is most likely what you meant to say. At any rate, just try to re-read your stuff before posting. Some times pasting into word can help, but of course, since may is a word that is spelt correctly, you might still miss things. so be careful XD Other than that, you were a formidable opponent in the first season, and I see you being tough here too, so keep it up. XD Spoiler: The Fuzzball Again as with the other critiques. Great layout and great use of colour and clearness. You addressed what was set in this challenge and you had very clear and good characters in this as well as creativity. You being a former judge realise how hard judging high level stuff is as it doesn't leave you with much to say. Considering this is the first round and I'm seeing posts I'd expect to see in the final rounds... Yup, not making things easy for me are ya buddy? Anyway. I loved this post and I personally feel that you definitely have a talent and knack for Role-Playing and writing in general. I'd like to see more of you in the RP arena in general. I want to see more of you shine in this competition and I believe you can get through a lot of rounds. Everyone is setting a high bar and even you, so I'm not even sure how this is gonna go. All I can say is keep fighting cause you definitely have a shot. Spoiler: Ace sucker thingy Ace! you perverted genius! XD Accidental boob squishing earns you bonus points in my eyes! We perverts have to stick togethe-... ... Jokes aside, your post made me laugh very hard as well as keeping me on the edge of my seat. It was very creative and I loved the character work you had. It was a interesting way of addressing the challenge and I believe it paid off. You had a very clear system in this, the kind a I like. One colour for action and then each character gets their own colour for speech. It made it so easy for me to read and you had such clear paragraphs and spacing, well... Well done indeed. You put effort into this post and it can be seen clearly. I look forward to future posts from you should you make it to the next round (which I believe you will) ((But of course, I've said that about pretty much everyone since the calibur of posts are so high.)) Continue working hard and you shall reap the rewards. That is that, I can say, I'm glad I didn't enter this season. Despite making it to the finals last time, I doubt I'd do so again against you guys XD You've all really impressed me, I can actually honestly say that you should all consider yourself winners already. This competition aims to not just be fun, but overall create an atmosphere to get people posting at their best. And these posts were definitely high quality. Just remember to take anything you learn here and incorporate it into your actual RPs you are a part of. Trust me, after I took part in this competition in the first season, my style of posting changed for RPs in general, and I believe I can say for the better too. Keep it up guys. I look forward to the next round! (and again, apologies for the severe delays in my critique Tum, Fuzz and Ace. If you want revenge, shoot my Uni Lecturers. XD) Oh, and any questions or shizzle regarding my critique or whatever (even how I feel about judge wigs) Just drop me a PM/VM or whatever and I'll get back to ya.
I agree. The bracelet would just be pretty cool XD Think of all the possibilities... *shot while day dreaming*
I shall request one of these. XD Since we have our Persona chats on FB, I shall put my faith in you to make me something awesome :P
Well, while I personally am more of a sword type of guy (or in that case, girl) The idea of 'Magic'al girl (Puella Magi, Mahou Shoujo etc)seems to make me question my first choice. Of course, in Madoka, they were magical girls with all sorts of weapons. Swords, guns, explosives, bows etc So... it would be an interesting prospect. In theory we would assume Kyubey's power would give you the weapon that matches you the most or what fits your desire. So overall, despite what I may like, there would be the chance I end up with something different anyway. (other than awesome boobies)
I'm not a girl, but I'd make a contract. *cough* I could go for the Kampfer style theme. That'd be pretty fun actually.
Me? And no looking at my Vlogs. XD
So that's why I was diagnosed like that... it all makes sense now. I mean... lolwut?
Eh? ME?! Why me?! lol I'm lord English yes... but I mean... *freaks out* My warcry is much better than that!
Elysia couldn't believe what she had just stumbled on... it was incredible, it was so awesome, it was- ...something she had to tell her siblings about right this very second. ~ She ran as fast as she could, huffing and panting as she dodged students and made her way down the ever changing stair cases. All afternoon, she had been trying to suppress her usual excitement of the upcoming Quidditch Match. Just as ever. She had also been tempted to schedule a last minute practice, but that all changed the second she made her discovery just now. The earlier excitement was overwhelmed by something even more unbelievable. The Team was in top form anyway. This new discovery right now could change everything! Where would they be right about now... She athletically leapt over the head of a first year Ravenclaw who was sat on the bottom step reading a book, not caring if he had just been able to peak up her skirt. Such things didn't bother her that much. Of course! The Great Hall! And so she headed there. Once she passed through the great big doors, she instantly spotted her siblings gathered around Lulu at the Ravenclaw table. "Guys!~" she shouted to them, skidding to a halt right next to them, huffing and panting drastically from having run down all seven floors none stop just to get here. She ignored the fact that a lot of people were looking at her like she was some sort of mad-woman. "Found... Incredible... Must... show you... come see... now." she muttered between her excited heavy breaths. She looked up at the confused looks of her family; Iris, Lelouch and Luke and gave them a big grin, one that she was famous for. It was what told them they were about to get into a whole lot of mischief.
I believe it was the taking of the dubbing job. Yes. I may be wrong, but it is what I have heard somewhere. So I'm just passing that on to you. To be honest, it hasn't actually been years hence why there has been no growth in Ash. Funnily enough, even in the latest Unova region seasons. Ash is still ten years old. Yup, that's right. He hasn't aged since the Indigo league (despite having so many Christmas episodes... which makes you think, how many Christmas's can they have in the space of a year. Maybe the world of Pokémon is just that different? lol) But yes, actual proof of Ash still being ten is revealed in the first episode of the Unova region season. The narrator is the one who reveals it in the first few minutes.
I read it lol XD
I now have added sexiness? Cool? I so need to sing my iron man song in my next Vlog... XD
