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No, you're the token gay character who was sloppily added in the last rewrite of the script because the executives said, "We need a gay character because DIVERSITY!" Because of this, your homosexuality is treated like it's just a minor quirk and becomes your only defining character trait. Nonetheless, you are loved by all viewers because your lack of character definition makes you the perfect way to makes jabs at the practice of adding diversity solely for the sake of diversity.

Meanwhile, I'm the sexually confused character who seems to be so deep in the closet that he feels the need to plaster the Straight Pride flag all over his body. In the end it's revealed that he's actually straight, but tumblr won't accept that and choose to believe that he's gay for Ashwin, the protagonist no matter how little sexual tension there is between them.

@#&%

21/M/EARTH, willing to use Entangle Link to get to Uranus.

You can't kill something that's been dead for years. KHV is just a spooky ghost of its former self.

I think the more interesting question is if "gay" and "straight" actually exist. The way I see it, everybody is bi and the labels "gay" and "straight" only exist because most people lean farther to one side than the other, making "true bi" comparatively rare. Don't all people have that one person they'd switch sexualities for?

Spongebob is an oppressive doodoo duke who treats pineapples like tools for his own comfort. It's disgusting.

You must have had the straightest face in the world when you read A Modest Proposal.

They do, and they're pretty good! Issue #12 and the end of the current arc came out this month.

Ugh, I hate it when people walk around in pineappleface like this.

Yes, and that's what I did. I got caught reflecting on how much harder my life would be if I were a transman instead of a cis-male and now the Council of Privileges (COPs) are threatening to take away my privilege card if I don't oppress four people that belong to the non-privileged counterparts to the privileges that I checked (male and cis, in this case). They can be cis-females or trans-anything, but I have to make sure to get them to sign off on having been oppressed by me specifically. I could also get just one transman to sign Form C-63 stating that my reflection was not sufficient to be officially considered checking privilege, but that's a 40 page document and I don't know any transmen who'd be willing to read that whole thing. Basically, it's easier to just get a few women to say that I oppressed them by signing the one page Form E-97.

You wouldn't think that something that's ingrained into society would have all these systems and rules behind it, but it does. It's not enough to just be a white hetersexual cis-male anymore. You have to present your card proving that you're allowed to receive the privileges associated with belonging to those groups.In case you haven't noticed, this is satire.

Turns out I didn't have as much money as I thought and coudln't afford a $15 thing, so I got her a Doctor Who comic book that's right at the beginning of my current favorite story arc. We already discussed the money issue in PMs though, so it's all good.

Gongs.

Not all pineapples are fruits, you know. Some of them are trapped in human bodies and have to raise awareness on behalf of their oppressed cis-pineapple brethren.

Reported for tone policing.

Also, look up Poe's Law.

Cloud was never part of the AVALANCHE. He was a mercenary that they hired for a little while. After his work was done they just stuck together because they were friends at that point.

The entire pineapple race. As a sexgendered pineapple-kin, I'm really triggered by white people like you trying to divided my race into arbitrary groups.

This whole thread is incredibly racist against pineapples.

Dracula is a better vampire story than Twilight.
Nosferatu is a better vampire story than Twilight.
Doctor Who is a better vampire story than Twilight.
Friends is a better vampire story than Twilight.
How I Met Your Mother is a better vampire story than Twilight.
Catch Me If You Can is a better vampire story than Twilight.
Anne Frank's diary is a better vampire story than Twilight.

And what good does that do for you or anyone else? Compensating a few families for unjust killings is barely a dent in the government's funding. It's certainly not going to change anything.

But okay, the next time you get shot and killed by a police officer who doesn't recognize your rights, you can rest in peace knowing that your family will file a complaint that, along with less than ten others, will make a real difference in society.

Naaaahh. You haven't even read my in-progress piece on how Hajime Isayama is clearly a Nazi sympathizer who wants the Axis to reunite and take over the world. The amount of strawgrasping will leave you speechless.

For one thing, it features pretty much all the neckwear that matters including but not limited to bowties, bolo ties, neckerchiefs, and cravats. We could sell replicas of the ones featured in the show. Also notable is its use of suspenders and belts. And considering who Erwin Smith is based on, he's definitely got a really fancy wallet. We could also sell flasks emblazoned with the logo of the Wall Building Squad. It would be beautiful.

N

Nah, I did it specifically to have that effect. I also haven't posted in a while, so there's that. Later I'm gonna try to make an animated version just to screw with y'all even more.