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Chapter Four (Beach)

“We seriously need a name.†Huang said.
“We have names, Akira equals me, Huang equals you. I‘m clear right?†Akira pointed out.
“No dummy! I meant like, we need a group name.†Huang yelled in exasperation.
“We aren’t a group we’re a pair, or a duo, or accomplices at best.†Akira said again in the same flat tone.
“Again not what I meant. I mean why can’t we be like the “heroes of truth and justice†or the “avengers†or something like that.â€
“One, those are lame names, bee, why do we need superfluous titles?â€
“Bee isn’t a number!†Huang protested.
“But it is second.†Akira countered to no avail.
“Screw you!†Huang shouted as he shoved his accomplice.
“Shush, before I throw up on you again.†Akira pushed him back and made a gagging noise.
“Eww how could you do something so horrible?†Huang cringed.
“Easy, you put your fingers down your throat…†Akira reached towards his mouth.
“Eww, I regret asking.†Huang flinched.
“Good now if you please, we’ve got a month to pull this off and I don’t want to make this any harder than it needs to be.†Akira fumed.
“Well, we still need a name.†Huang said quickly.
“I said no.†Akira refused firmly.
“I said we need it.†Huang continued.
“I DON’T CARE!†Akira exploded.
“Gosh! I just wanna make things cooler and you try to mess up all my plans.†Huang grumbled angrily.
“If your plans weren’t so dumb!†Akira retorted.
“Whose dumb!? Chicken man!†Taunted Huang.
“Your dead!†Akira began to throttle Huang.
“AGH! Get off me you stupid oaf.†Huang kicked Akira off.
“Whose the oaf?!†Akira tripped Huang into a sand dune as he rushed in.
“Shut up!†Huang shot back lifting himself up.
“I will if you will!†Akira shouted. For a long moment the just stopped talking and walked along.
“…†And along.
“…†And along.
“…†And along.
“…†And along.
“This is hella boring.†Huang burst out.
“I liked it better when we were fighting.†Akira agreed.
“Yeah, DIE!†Huang punched Akira across the face.
“You first!†Akira resumed throttling his ally. This sort of behavior went on for several hours, a testament to their endurance and lack of social skills. Finally they reached the beach, as expected it was a very lively place and it seemed to be some sort of proving ground for warriors beginning journeys of their own. Many were novices and couldn’t provide a challenge at all. However, word reached their ears of a band of marauding bandits that had apparently defeated the mightiest warrior for miles around. Akira followed the trail of rumors to a rundown old inn. In side there were only two people; a young muscular man with short jet black hair and a petit girl with long brown hair tied into a ponytail. Akira began to doubt the stories and turned to leave, but Huang burst in kicking and screaming.
“I’ll kill every one of ya! I’ll beat you with my eyes closed.†Akira smacked himself in the forehead.
“Shut up. Please shut up.†Akira said weakly to himself.
“What was that, a challenge?†The small woman got up and hefted a giant spear. Akira groaned. “Well?â€
“Of course that was a challenge! I’ll beat both of you at once!†Huang seemed very confident.
“Huang, while you do that I’ll go get some traveling supplies. Don’t die or anything stupid like that, got it?†Akira sad this several times to be sure his headstrong companion wouldn’t do anything worse than he already had. Akira went over to the journey outfitters and bought, or rather half stole and half begged for, supplies and a new outfit. It was rather hot in the badlands and it wasn’t good to sweat out all the water you get ‘cause your clothes aren’t right. He left with a travel bag with the supplies and his old clothes. He wore steel lined geta sandals, a pair of blue jean shorts, a white tank top and a plain beige Hawaiian shirt. He walked over to the run down inn to see what had happened and to his great surprise Huang was lain out across the floor with drool hanging out of his mouth.
“That wasn’t too hard.†The woman laughed heartily. “You owe us everything you got.â€
“What?†Akira asked blankly.
“He,†She motioned to Huang, “bet all your stuff against all ours.â€
“Dammit, Huang I told you not to do anything stupid! And what do you do you do something incredibly stupid!†Akira shook the unconscious Huang violently as he screamed in his face.
“What? You wanna fight too? If you fight though you can only win your stuff back.†She narrowed her eyes at the silly duo.
“Sure.†Akira replied. “Let’s take this outside though I don’t fight in confined spaces.â€
“Whatever you say.†She giggled. So far she’d apparently done all he talking and all the fighting. The big guy just sat there and nodded at everything she said. Once outside a crowd began to form. Most were cheering for the girl, it was probably something to do with the way she dressed. She wore a see through white tank top over a bikini top and she wore a pair of torn cargo shorts revealing what Akira would describe as “an indecent amount of leg.†This really wasn’t helpful, since Akira had never once in his life had to fight a woman.
“Dammit. I forgot she’d be the one fighting.†Akira thought to himself. Out of nowhere an announcer type appeared and began commentary of the fight. It went along the lines of.
“Welcome ladies, gentlemen, and all manner of unsavory characters, to the challenge that none of you should ever make! In this corner(There were spontaneous corners created in the crowd at this point) A relative newcomer to the proving grounds and probably the stupidest guy you’d ever meet! What’s your name kid?â€
“Akira.â€
“Akira the terror Gonzalez!â€
“That isn’t my name, fool.â€
“Shut up. And in this corner the reigning champion The Crimson Bandit Haburi Kensei!†The girl was maybe a year or so older than Akira and she was about his height.
“This is gonna be bad, I know it.†Akira complained to himself. Kensei was first to attack, it was instantly clear why Huang had lost. He was an offensive fighter and had long linear movements, Kensei was the same but the key difference that made Kensei better was range. With her spear she could strike in the same amount of time but her attacks could very easily penetrate his weak guard before he could counter. Akira evaded the thrust and took her back. He began a kick however she spun of and jammed it with the reverse end of her weapon. A second thing, he hadn’t remembered a spear is more versatile than a sword the length and maneuverability can be altered with the grip. Akira slid off of the powerful blow and rushed in. At the last moment before her counter hit Akira grasped her spear just near her handhold and swept out her front leg. The key weakness in her form was the base of the spear is moving at less than half the speed of the tip and if one can stop the base where the spear is being pivoted it can temporarily prevent attacks. The second thing is a spear like any weapon requires a strong base for ease of motion. If one is knocked off balance they can neither attack or defend. Akira saw all of this in the moments before she gained her balance back he kicked her hard in the gut. She groaned a little but even the steel geta didn’t give much penetration. Akira reanalyzed his situation. The one thing he hadn’t taken into account until now was Kensei had some kind of preternatural strength and muscular structure for someone so small and thin. Akira wasn’t weak by any means but this girl was like some kind of monster. She got up from the kick several seconds later, cracked her neck and smiled.
“That’s the first time I’ve ever been hit in a fight.†She seemed almost too happy, after all there were two bruises right where the geta had sunk in. “I think this is gonna be fun!†She charged forward with a vertical sweeping motion, halfway through she changed it into a sharp stab. Akira was able to perfectly read her movements and evaded accordingly. Akira just kept on using the same tricks over and over but each time she was hit Kensei came back with twice the force as before. Even after a long fight neither would give up.
“This is over, it’s clear I’m better.†Akira said and he could back it up, he wasn’t even out of breath. The crowd stood in awe, no one had hit Kensei once but Akira had hit her multiple times.
“What are you talking about this is just warm up.†Kensei surely was an excellent fighter, but she never adapted to changes and she just kept on doing the same thing over and over. “Guess I’ll have to swallow my pride and hit you with the best I have.â€
“Good, no holding back.†Akira lowered his stance to just inches above the sand.
“’Cause if you do, you’ll die.†Kensei smiled and began spinning the great spear over her head.
“She’s gonna go with one hundred percent power and speed on this one.†Akira thought as the spear spun faster and faster. “ I won’t be able to evade it once it comes, so I’ll have to over power it.†At the same moment they both rushed forwards. Kensei brought down her spear and Akira brought up his kick, straight for the head. They clash created such a force that sand was blown everywhere and no one could see who had won.
“Kensei’s won this.†The muscular man said proudly. He was clearly not dumb by any means, but he was far from the sharpest tool in the shed.
“I wouldn’t be so sure of that.†Huang had woken up by now and was watching the fight.
“What do you mean?†The man was taken aback at this.
“Akira’s a genius, he’ll find away to beat her at her own game.†Huang smirked. “looks like we’ll see who’s the winner now, the sand’s finally beginning to settle.†Everyone was surprised to see what happened next. Akira was lying out heaving in ragged breath and Kensei was knocked senseless with the fragments of her spear scattered about the area. “Told ya so.â€
“How could that kid beat her she was over powering him it’s just not possible.†The crowd murmured similar things, all in total disbelief, except Huang who just smiled away.
“Akira! Get up and say you won!†Huang shouted.
“Shut up and be patient I’m getting ready!†Akira coughed.
“How?†Huang asked stupidly.
“I’m getting the sand out of my mouth you idiot, now shut up!†Akira coughed some more and spit out some sand. Eventually he got up and said he won.
“But, how?†The muscular man was still in shock. “She’s the strongest. It’s impossible.â€
“Improbable, actually.†Akira interjected. “Let me explain. She was smart when she used the momentum of the spear and her enormous strength to hit me. But, I am bigger than her and faster than her.â€
“What’s that got to do with it?†Interrupted the announcer who hadn’t said anything since the beginning.
“As I was saying. Her spear conducted her power my sandal conducted mine. She may have been moving fast but the power behind it wasn’t enough. She’s too light. A heavy blow like that will work if you’ve got a heavy weapon or you are a heavy person. However, neither her nor her weapon is very heavy. Second, I came up from the ground. I didn’t rely on my own strength, rather the strength of the ground. You see I used my entire body how she used her spear. I was being pushed by the earth beneath me so I had infinitely more power, it was a matter if I could take the blow with out dying that was the gamble.
“Oh I get it! It’s simple physics. You’re mass was up against the earth so it was just like her hitting a steel block on the ground with all her might plus your kicking force.†Huang said as he drew a little diagram of it in the sand.
“Yeah it’s basically that. However my leg hurts like hell right now.†Akira limped over to Kensei. She was awake by now and getting up. He offered a hand to help but she got up on her own.
“That’s the best fight I’ve had in years. I’ve always been the best ever since I was a kid. I’m kinda glad I lost here today, gives me something to strive for.†She straightened up and looked around.
“Thanks.†Akira smiled as they shook hands.
“So, what’re you doing all the way out here? I know that style anywhere, you’re from Wei aren‘t you?†She asked friendly all of a sudden.
“Yeah, can’t fool you I guess. “Akira chuckled. “I’m sorta temporarily banished. The five took over and now I’ve gotta get back in and kill them.†Akira had barely finished explaining himself when Kensei began replying.
“Really, sounds fun. When do we leave?†She asked brightly.
“We?†Akira asked confusedly.
“I can’t leave an innocent kid like you walking around the Badlands can I?†She got him in a head lock and rumpled his hair.
“Innocent?†Akira mumbled.
“What about me!?†Huang shouted.
“You too.†She punched him in the arm playfully. Although Akira was sure he heard a suppressed howl of pain. “As you know, I’m Haburi Kensei but, you guys can call me Kensei and you are?â€
“I’m Akira, last name’s not needed.†Akira answered.
“I’m Huang Feng, but most just call me Huang.†Huang answered nicely. “Who’s that?†He pointed to the stoic black haired wore heavy leather traveling clothes and a huge metal club was slung across hi back.
“Oh, that’s just Jin. He hates to talk to others.†Kensei explained. “So like I said where to?â€
“I dunno, Akira said he had some training to do.†Huang and the others turned to Akira.
“I thought someone around here could tell me where some strong fighters were.â€
“I just remembered something!“ Huang whipped out the wall map he’d show Akira the day before and pointed to a canyon not far from them. “Well, there’s another proving ground in the Hachi Temple it’s just a days walk from here. I heard they taught some pretty strange techniques over there.â€
“Do you always carry that map?†Jin asked flatly.
“Yeah, why?†Huang replied slowly.
“No reason.†Jin remained silent for the rest of the trip.



Yeah this one gets a bit silly but that's okay. I don't know but I think my writings been getting progressively worse. Oh well, comment and such.

He should go. It doesn't matter if it fails. 'Cause money is a terrible thing to waste.

Still trying to think of something that doesn't have innuendo... None of you are making this easy for me. Or is it just everything has innuendo for me?

Villain. It's the easy way out. Plus I get the sith membership card. We got deathstar we got deathstar we got deathstar...


Also I need like to get revenge on all you who have wronged righted or ignored me. So, it's the darkside! You are correct!

Slapping machines are a genius invention and I think I'll give mine to rat. He can now have hours of slap happy fun. Here rat have fun and don't break it I still have eight more payments on this thing.

Your timeline is different from mine. I was aware of the pastness but I had no idea it was like 8 years in the past. You can tell my math sucks.

I really like that one. It was a bit awkward at points but that's hardly a flaw. Well, that's all I got.

I'm sure you were. It's my job to annoy people you get remembered if disgruntled internet people track you down and put a price on your head.

Is this necessary?

Edit: IFy don no was gon in hur tis gon b i rly dun no Why'd I type likethat it's like some manner of spasm. See above stuff.

Define big. Also define mess.

For those who wanna know how I found out Spam explodes... It is simple physics and tests on my stove. If something with a lower specific heat has energy imparted on it it will expand as it's molecules(Atoms) wanna move so the pressure builds and... pop!

Thanks for the uneccesary mental pictures people.

Maybe Xaldin just needs to be together with a girl whose got a similar phobia then they'll just I dunno talk and ****.

Edit: This looks bad for those with minds as dirty as mine the last word can be substituted with stuff. I hope only I saw that.

Me wantsa hear also.

I thought spam was that **** they sold in cans that explodes on the stove top when heated, like a bomb or a lava lamp. Good times...

That one actually sounded alright to me Xaldin your just eccentric. Oh yeah, um, ah, I , what was it? I wanted to say something encouraging or torturous. I wanted to say it and now I forgot it.

Now I remember! Xaldin should slow down on the dating game and gain more EXP before trying to beat this level.

*hides anyways and begins to sulk with an oxygen tank in hand*

DamnYOU! You ****ing tricked me! I cannot believe it. That whole thing was a fake! I'm gonna have to get on oxygen or something! I can't breathe! You horrible horrible person!

No, he'd kill ME 'cause I'm doing that. Maybe not now though I've got to work on some other project.