The thing is that his good Christmas kinda involves everyone dropping what THEY'RE doing and spending time together... And you can already kinda see that pretty much EVERYONE has at least ONE person who they hate, or at least something else they feel is more worth their time, so when 12 different people get the feeling of, "Oh, I'm just one person - it's not like they'll notice if I go do this or that..." aaaand suddenly Demyx is alone. But, be honest. How many times has YOUR mom or dad or grandma or someone like that gone to you and said, "Hey - why don't we spend Christmas TOGETHER this year?" and you're all, ".... Yeah - in a minute. I'm texting my friends \ Checking my e-mail \ Playing videogames right now..." or just have plain gone, "I don't want to!" We all do it SOMETIME, and this is a story about making Christmas a family thing again, since it's only ONE day of the year. ^^ BTW, thanks, girl - ur quite awesome, rly. ;w; *huggles*
Chapter 2 (Meltdown) OH, GAWD. X.x;;; SO much work put into this thing - you guys have no idea - rly. X'DDD I a little late, I'll admit, but it's better late than never. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Vexen grinned maniacally as he screwed in the final bolt. “THERE!†he cried, clasping his hands together proudly. “The last piece of the puzzle! Isn’t this exciting Lexaeus?!†he squealed. “Uh… Yeah,†Lex replied, rolling his eyes to the ceiling. “… Thrilling.†“I KNOW!!!†Vexen dashed over to the control panel of the huge machine looming over the monstrosity he’d created, and pulled down his goggles. “FINALLY! After much testing and experimenting, the time is NOW! All that I have left to do is jog the electrical currents of the brain, and success is OURS!!!†Lex stared at him. This is like sex for you, isn’t it…? He grabbed the handle of a great lever, grinning wickedly. “READY?!†Lex snapped on his goggles, and flashed a thumbs-up. “READY!†Vexen nodded and slammed the heavy lever down with all his might. A deep THUD reverted through the air for a while, leaving nothing but silence. Then, slowly but surely, the great machine groaned to life. As seconds passed the chugging of the machine became more fluid and effortless. It wasn’t long before all that was left of the horrid squeaking sound was a gentle whirl. A bright blue beam began collecting at the tip, steadily getting bigger and bigger until… With a sudden sharp crackle of electricity, the beam was released and shot onto Vexen’s Monster like a bolt of lightning. A few moments later… It started moving! Vexen cackled insanely. “It’s alive! IT’S ALIIIIIVE!!!!!†Oooooooh…… Lex thought, staring. Pretty colors… The monster gave a mechanical groan that sounded more like a low, squeaky hinge on a door than anything. For a second, it laid there, twitching on the lab table, when— SNAP!!! Vexen’s eyes widened. Uh oh… That doesn’t sound good…! He was absolutely right. It wasn’t. “HIT THE DECK!†KA-BOOOOOM!!! ********************************* Three… Two… One… Luxord sighed as all the lights cut off, along with the gentle whirl of the heater. “I knew it…†********************************* Demyx and Saïx gasped in unison at the blood-curdling scream. Saïx immediately released the boy’s narrow shoulders, and began glancing around in utter confusion. “W…What’s going on…?!†Demyx cried, glancing around. “And who WAS that?!†“I… I don’t know…†Saïx replied honestly, his golden eyes sweeping the empty hallway as he tried to gather his bearings. Suddenly, the scream came again – this time even louder than before. Demyx gasped. “That’s Zexion!†Saïx's eyes narrowed, and he promptly dashed off. “Come on!†he shouted back to Demyx. Demyx blinked and quickly followed after the man. ********************************* Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock! “Zexion, are you alri—YOW!†The door suddenly slammed open, causing Demyx to stagger back, clutching his poor, abused nose once more. His eyes watered with tears, as he thought with a slight whimper, No wonder Luxord warned me to stay away from doors… Saïx blinked as Zexion stepped out, wrapped up in only a dark-blue robe. The boy glared at the two members staring curiously back, and hissed, “I was only half-way done… HALF-WAY DONE!!!†Demyx immediately gave him a queasy look, but Saïx took it all in stride. “Hey, don’t look at us. We’re honestly just as confused as you about what happened to the power.†“Oh, don’t you give me that!†Zexion snapped. “YOU—!†Saïx cut him a grade-A glare. “… N-Never mind; I believe you,†Zexion grumbled, crossing his arms. BOOM! Suddenly, a smoking game-system flew out of Axel’s room, and smashed into the wall. An unearthly scream of rage followed it. “That’s IT! That is ****in’ IT! I am through with this mother****in’ game! RAAAAAAUGHHH!!!!!†Axel dashed out of the room, and began flinging fireballs at the poor, helpless machine. “I was on level five, you stupid game! LEVEL FIVE!!! That sacred place was not MEANT for mortal eyes and you RUINED it! GAHHH!!!†Roxas walked out behind him, and stared at the three other onlookers. “…Axel’s mad,†he explained. “Ya don’t say…†Saïx snarled back. “Gee – thanks for clearing that up for me, Roxas!†Finally, the game-system had been reduced to a smoldering puddle of liquid plastic. He stood there, huffing with anger for a while, then looked up at the other Nobodies. “Oh… Sup, guys?†Zexion sighed, “Just come here, Axel… I’ve got an idea. Maybe if you can make that light brighter, it’ll attract all of the other members.†He crossed his arms, pouting a little. “I’m going to have to have to have a little ‘talk’ with Xemnas concerning ‘Zexxy’s Happy Time’…†Demyx looked like he was going to barf again. Axel only shrugged. “Okay. Great idea, lil' man.†“Just do it,†the Cloaked Schemer snarled. Axel rolled his eyes, and lit up a huge blaze on the palm of one hand. It wasn't very long before Luxord showed up, Vexen's ladder tucked safely under his arm. He glared at Demyx for a long time. “Told ya so.†“Eh-heh-heh...†Demyx chuckled embarrassedly. “I'm not even gonna ask,†Zexion muttered. Larxene was next to arrive. “Okay...†she started, face a bright scarlet with complete rage. “What the **** is going on here?! I had a VERY important date with some apple pie, but then all the lights went out, and the mother****in MICROWAVE blew up with my pie inside, GODDAMN IT!†“S-Sorry, Larxene,†Demyx whimpered as Axel and Zexion drooled over her outfit. “We don't really know what's going on either!†“Yo! DUDES!†“Wha'?! XIGGY?!†Luxord spun around quickly, forgetting that he was clutching the ladder in his arms. “OW!†Demyx cried, holding onto his newly bruised eye tightly. “Oh! Sorry about that, mate! Um... Just... put that on ice or something.†He turned back to watching his eye-candy approach. Xigbar was running up to the small crowd, still pulling on the last sandal on his foot as he did so. He was in a white robe with two wings resting on his back. His long, raven hair was flowing down his shoulders, and, if you looked closely at it, his hair seemed kinda wet. With the help of his space powers, he managed to make a little halo float above his head. After a moment of drooling and sick fantasizing, Luxord kicked himself mentally. DAMN ME! I should have been there AS SOON AS he walked out of the door! All of that hard work for NOTHING! Xigbar stopped as soon as he was in the circle of loving and together-ness with a slight sigh. He stared at Saïx's costume for a second. “Nice one, dude.†Saïx rolled his eyes. “Thanks.†Marluxia portaled next to them, causing Luxord to spin around and smack Demyx AGAIN on the back of the head. “Hey, guys – what's going on?! I saw the lights go out from outside and I rushed right in!†Demyx sighed. “Okay, I might as well fill the rest of you guys in while we wait for everyone else to show up.†“Please do,†Marluxia murmured, crossing his arms. As Demyx tried his best to explain what had happened, Zexion began sniffing slightly. Is it just me, or... does something smell like... He sniffed again. “Guys. Heads up – I think that someone else is coming!†Within a few minutes, Zexion's keen sense of smell proved to be right. Vexen and Lex showed up, coughing and hacking out smoke. Their hair had been blown completely back, and everything at the front of their bodies were completely black with soot. A dark cloud of smoke (as well as a strange scent that smelled a little like burned fish) seemed to follow them wherever they went. A hushed silence filled the room as everyone took the time to glare them into non-existence. It only took one glance, and they KNEW. Vexen coughed one more time, and lifted his blackened goggles, revealing two white rings around his eyes where the goggles had been. He glanced over the unhappy-looking crowd, and gulped. “... Oops...†That was all the excuse they needed to begin absolutely ASSAULTING the two men. Mostly Vexen. “VEXEN, YOU IDIOT!†“WHAT DID YOU DO THIS TIME?!†“YOU'RE CRUISIN' FOR A BRUISIN' YA OLD ***!†“WHEN WE GET THROUGH WITH YOU...!†“FIX IT!†“BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH—!†“HEY!†Vexen screamed, cutting them all off. “How come you never scream at HIM?!†He pointed to Lexaeus angrily. Lex gasped. “N-no, DON'T—!†“He's right!†Axel screamed. “I say we flame them BOTH!†So they did. “LEXAEUS, YOU ******-ASSED *****!!!†“WE HATE YOU!†“GO DIE IN A HOLE!†“THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!†“BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH!!!†“WHAT is all of this ruckus all about?!†someone demanded, rounding the corner with a furious snarl on his face. Saïx gasped. “Superior! Oh, thank Kingdom Hearts!†Here we go... everyone thought. “I was so WORRIED! All of the power is out, and, why, without this human torch here to light the way, one can barely see their hand in front of their face!†Saïx gushed, displaying an unusual amount of 'emotion' – especially for him. “And the power is out! What if the Heartless had breached the castle walls and we weren't able to hear the siren and you'd have to face them all on your own?! I could hardly BARE it if anything ever happened to—!†“Thank you for your concern, Saïx,†Xemnas replied politely, “but the only troubling thing that resulted from the blackout is that I got a rather important speech of mine cut off...†Oh ****... Everyone glanced at each other, starting to sweat a little. Xemnas rubbed his chin slightly. “Quite interesting, really – it was concerning the—†“O-Okay, there, Xem – you can tell us about that later,†Xigbar interrupted quickly. “We've got bigger things on our hands.†Everyone sighed a sigh in relief – another long, dull, POINTLESS speech avoided! “Right,†Xemnas agreed with a nod. “First off, what exactly happened?†Everyone pointed to Vexen and Lexaeus. “Okay, then.†Xemnas crossed his arms and cocked an eyebrow. “Explain.†Vexen rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. “Well... It was just a little experiment—†“—THAT BLEW OUT THE REST OF THE FREAKIN' POWER!†Zexion screeched, eye twitching slightly. “BOULDERDASH!†Vexen protested before another scream-for-all could erupt. “Yes, the experiment took a fair amount of electricity to pull off, but not enough that it would short-circuit the entire castle! I calculated it!†He raised an eyebrow. “So, pray tell, what exactly were YOU guys doing right before the power went out?†Xigbar shrugged. “Blow-dryin' my hair. And watchin' TV.†“Well, WE were just playin' video-games and listening to music!†Axel cried. “I was... Downloading... certain things online...†Zexion answered evasively. He looked down at his slippers as if they were the most important things on earth as Demyx busied himself thinking about cute things like bunnies and such. “I was eating pie! Pie I never got to EAT!†Larxene snapped. “Well, with just those things alone added to the power it takes for the extra lights and heater...†Lex snapped his fingers. “That must be it! The generator was over-loaded – not just because of the experiment, but because of all of our individual contributions!†Larxene stomped her foot down like a spoiled child having a temper tantrum. “But if it wasn't for the stupid experiment, it probably wouldn't MATTER what WE did you pair of IDIOTS!†“HEY!†Vexen snapped. “Stop yelling at Lexaeus!†“Stop yelling at Larxene for yelling at Lexaeus!†Axel piped up. “STOP yelling at Vexen for yelling at me for yelling at Lexaeus!†“Stop yelling at ME for yellin' at Vexen for yellin' at you for yellin' at Lexaeus!†“Stop yelling at me for yelling at you for yelling at Vexen for yelling at me for yelling at Lexaeus!†Roxas dashed up to the bickering duo and screamed, “STOP YELLIN' AT AXEL FOR YELLIN' AT YOU FOR YELLING AT HIM FOR YELLING AT YOU FOR YELLING AT... BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH!!!!!†Needless to say, pandemonium erupted pretty damn fast. “YOU CAN'T TALK TO HER THAT WAY!!!†“DON'T MAKE ME—!†“SHUT UP, YA LITTLE—!†“OW, my spleen...!†“STOP IT! Cut it out this MINUTE!†Demyx screamed, engulfing the squabbling group in a huge blast of water. “We've got more important things to worry abut, so just COOL IT—!†“YAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!†Axel dropped to the ground, completely spazzing out. “WATER! Stop, drop and roll! Stop, drop and roll!†Larxene slapped her forehead, her antenna drooping pitifully. Xemnas sighed as Axel continued rolling around on the ground like an idiot. “Ignore him for now. Thanks a lot, Number IX.†Saïx glared at the boy, teeth chattering with anger as well as the freezing cold. “Yeah... Thanks a LOT, Demyx...†he snarled out of pure jealousy. “So you're sure that the generator is the reason the power is out, Vexen?†“Of course,†Vexen replied with a nod. “Shouldn't be too hard to fix. The Dusks could probably do it for me.†“Well, I'm taking you just in case.†Xemnas snapped his fingers, and pointed to Roxas. “You're in charge of drying VIII off while he's still sane. Meanwhile, Zexion... Uh... Put some real clothes on.†Zexion pouted, crossing his arms. “Oh, and has anyone seen Xaldin anywhere?†“Sleeping!†“Ah... I see. Well, leave him be – the cold that is bound to come will be his alarm. Winters in the World That Never Was are usually very harsh. Last year, I think it was at least 30 below one afternoon.†Everyone groaned. “Oh MAN!†“You've gotta be kidding!†“We'll freeze!†“Stop, drop, and roll!†“No, we won't,†Xemnas sighed. “Nobodies are notoriously resilient. We can just wait it out until the generator is up and running again.†Vexen cracked his knuckles. “Well, then – I'd better get to work soon! Repairing the generator may be Dusk work, but I'd be a lot faster at it.†“Wait a moment – what about Larxene?†Zexion asked. Larxene blinked. “What ABOUT me?†“Well, you have control over electricity, so in theory, couldn't you simply—†“ARE YOU KIDDIN' ME?!†she screeched. “Do you know how much POWER that would take?! Imagine trying to to fill this WHOLE castle with electricity! I just can't do it, man!†“And, assuming it's the same with Axel as far as heat is concerned, we're back at square one,†Xemnas sighed. “So all of you may return to your rooms for now and dry off while Vexen and I examine the generator.†With a few disgruntled sighs and muttered remarks, the huge group dispersed. ********************************* “Okay, Vexen, work your magic.†“Gladly, Superior.†Xemnas sat back with a flashlight and began calmly reading a book as Vexen went to work with his own little flashlight. The generator was an absolute MESS – smoke poured out of it like water out of a fountain. The Academic did various little things; tightening a bolt here and there, stopping to jot down some directions for the Dusks, poking through a jungle of wires, oiling a— “That's IT! I can't work this way – not with you narrating EVERY single thing I do RIGHT IN MY EAR!!!†Vexen screamed. “SEE?! Just like that! I KNOW I'm screaming, you imbecile – THE FONT IS IN ALL CAPS!†Xemnas blinked, eyes wide. “Vexen, I think it's time for a break,†he sighed. “What? Xemnas, I'm fine! I was just— …What the heck is that line for? Is that even grammatically correct?!†Xemnas sighed again, pulling a needle out of his coat pocket and uncapping it. “Okay, Vexxy, time to go ni-ni...†Vexen froze and instinctively grabbed his arm, looking like a scared rabbit. “... I dun WANNA go ni-ni...†he whimpered. “Come, now, Vexen. Don't make me chase yo—†“NO! You can't make me! Vexxy goes ni-ni when Vexxy wants! GET AWAY!†Vexen scrambled off, a panic-stricken expression on his face. Xemnas gave an exasperated groan and went after the crazy son of a— “My mother was a SAINT! And I'm NOT crazy!!!†the insane man cried, stopping for a second to shake his fist at the ceiling. Quick as a whip, Xemnas seized his arm, holding the needle up threateningly. Vexen gasped, his eyes betraying nothing but pure fear. “N-No! NOOO!!! Let me go – I won't – ooooookay, I'z go ni-ni now, lolz...†he sighed, eyes drooping. Xemnas finished injecting the sedative into his arm, and then caught the snoring man in his arms. He sighed, summoning a horde of Dusks. “Finish the job,†he ordered. “T'would seem that Number IV is a little... out of it.†********************************* “It was just s...so cold... so cold and WET...!†“Mmm-hmmm.†“It was horrible...!†“I know, Axel – I know...†“Seriously – I wasn't sure if...†A sob. “I wasn't sure if I'd make it out this time...!†A sigh. “Just let it all out, man... Just let it all out...†Roxas sat on the floor, rubbing a now-damp towel on Axel's body, trying to soak up all of the remaining water. As he did so, he was shooting dirty looks at the boy seated cross-legged on the bed. “Let me just say again that I am so, so, so, so, so so sorry that I did that!†Demyx apologized. “Seriously – I just kinda... lost it! I really hate seeing people fight, and, and, it's Christmas EVE, and I just— “A-bleat, bleat, bleat, bleat, yeah whatever,†Roxas gnashed. “Last time I checked, you weren't the one one drying this jack-ass off!†“I'm right here, ya know...†Axel whimpered. “Shut up, ya pansy. Before I get out the super-soaker.†Such strong words... Axel thought, pouting. Nevertheless, he stayed silent, deciding to wait until he was fully dry to exact his revenge. “So, what are we gonna do now?†Roxas grumbled. “I don't know....†Demyx sighed. “We'd better get ready for tonight – I mean, after all, we—†“DRY NOW!†Axel cried, jumping up. The next moment, he pounced on Roxas. “That's for the PANSY insult, betch!†“GYAAAAH!!!†Roxas shrieked, toppling to the ground. “Axel, you ******* – THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?!†Axel cackled viciously. “Stop hittin' yourself! Stop hittin' yourself! Stop hittin' yourself!†“Axel, you little—OW! STOP it!†“BWAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Stop hittin' yourself!!!†Demyx smacked his face, shaking his head slowly. He got up, and walked out of the room, leaving the two fighting morons behind. ********************************* Xaldin's eyes cracked open slowly. After ten solid minutes of staring out into space, the man finally turned his drowsy gaze to the window beside his bed. It took his tired mind a while to understand exactly what he was seeing, but he could tell by the position of Kingdom Hearts that couldn't be past 4:30. So what the hell had awaken him?! That's when he noticed the tiny stream of fog trailing from his nostrils curling up into the air like a snake. It. Was. FREEZING. Blinking his red, bloodshot eyes, he lumbered out off his bead like a huge, cranky bear that'd been awaken from his hibernation, and shuffled over to the bathroom. The heater's gotta be broken or somethin'... he thought. Figures. Oh well; I'm already up, so I might as well get dressed and ready. He flicked the light switch. To his surprise, nothing happened. He examined the light bulb carefully. “Huh... Ain't that the one I replaced, like, a week ago...? Weird...†He shrugged. Oh well; he'd just light some candles or something. He tried to turn on the faucet, but by then the water pipes had completely frozen over. The tub stayed as dry as a desert. “......... Oooo-kay...!~†Shaking his head, Xaldin turned towards the toilet. His fly was already half-undone before he realized the water in the toilet had already frozen over. “Oh, for ****'s SAKE!†the man screamed, slamming down the lid. “What the hell is going ON here?! I have to find what is up NOW before I'm forced to kick something small and furry in the ovaries!†He blinked. “Again...†he muttered. Bad memories. Shaking off the haunting thoughts, the man quickly got himself bundled on, putting on several coats and a scarf, and then charged out of the his room into the rest of the dark castle. ********************************* “M-Mark my w-words, Marluxia...! Th-There will s-s-soon come a d-day that I find dirt about y-you so appalling y-y-y-you'll have t-to—†“Aw, c'mon, Zexxy – you act like I'm raping you you or something!†A laugh. “You ARE. In mind and s-spirit.†“Oh, hush up and let me fix you up... there!†Marluxia clasped his hands together, grinning. “You wook so'w cyute, I cou'wd jus'w eat choo UP!†He held up a mirror, beaming. “See???†Zexion glared icily at the pathetic reflection staring back at him, teeth chattering ever-so slightly. He had a little Santa hat that was tilted a little on the side and had a tiny silver bell on the end. Marluxia had also given him a butt-ugly green -and-white sweater with a little picture of an elf on it. It read “Santa's Little Helper†in bold red font. The boy's brow twitched slightly in annoyance. Deciding that going into denial was the only way to save his sanity, he pretended that image was simply a different person trapped in an alternate dimension. Go away. You aren't welcome here. Surprisingly, the rebellious little man trapped in the mirror didn't disappear. Zexion sighed. That's it – I'm jumping FOR REAL this time. “Well?!†Marluxia squealed. “What do ya think?! Isn't it ADORABLE?!†Zexion shot the pink-haired assassin a glare SO potent, you could feel the heat from several feet away. “... I w-will have my revenge, M-Marluxia,†he growled, cursing inwardly at how stupid he sounded with that blasted stutter. “Well, I think it's cute. Plus, it'll keep you nice and warm now that things are starting to get really chilly!†“W-Well, I think I'm going to KILL you!†Zexion snapped, reaching for Marluxia's neck, as if he were going to strangle him. “Marluxia...!~†someone sang. “I'm both respecting you privacy by knocking and asserting my authority as your superior by coming in anyway...!~†BOOM! Zexion lost his balance, falling squarely on Marluxia's lap, and blinked as Xaldin burst through the door, carrying a huge battering ram. …What the **** is that pot-head thinking? The man raised an eyebrow at the strange scene before him and smirked. “Am I interrupting something, Zexxy...?†he asked, grinning. Zexion face-palmed, suddenly realizing that the way he was lying down on the older male was ANYTHING but flattering. He pulled himself up, pouting, and glared the other way. Marluxia shook his head, eying Xaldin suspiciously. “Well... No. I was just, ya know—†“Great, great, great – okay, listen here, fruit cake.†Marluxia glared at him even more. “I wanna know what happened to the power, and I wanna know NOW. What – did Vexen make some sorta time machine that threw us into the Dark Ages?†“Noooooo....†“Then what?!†Marluxia struck a thoughtful pose. “Well, ya see, that's complicated—†“And suddenly I don't care anymore. Look – can SOMEONE just turn on the god-forsaken power so that I can get back to my...†Xaldin trailed off, eyes wide. “Oh, NO! I forgot – the pies are stuck in the fridge! What if they go bad?!†“Oh puh-lease!†Marluxia scoffed. “Honey, I'd bet my whole basket of azaleas that it was warmer in that fridge when the power went out than it is OUT HERE now.†Zexion shivered a little, hugging his shoulders. “Th-The f-first time I-I-I'd have to agree w-with that d-******-***...†“Well, whatever. I'm going to check on them, anyway – make sure that the security system is working. You guys wanna come?†Marluxia glared at him. “No,†he replied tartly. Zexion was wrapping a blanket around him for extra warmth. Even as much as he hated that stupid sweater, he decided against taking it off. Marluxia – it WAS quite warm, and taking it off now would be foolish. The boy looked up at Xaldin, his expression flat. “If he doesn't want to go, then you can count me in,†he growled, jerking his thumb in Marluxia's direction. “Aaaaaaaaaand if Zexxy-Bob's in, then I'm in!†Zexion scowled at the man, then rolled his eyes and began trailing after Xaldin, wondering when he'd ever be able to shake the little pest. ********************************* “No, seriously. Ask me that one more time – just one – and I'll smack the TASTE out your mouth. Don't play with me, Axel...†“Aw, c'mon, Larx—†“No.†Axel gave a shrill whine that loosely translated to, “But I'm SANTA, and you're missing cause!†“No! Need I remind you that there's a CHILD present?!†“Hey!†Roxas snapped. “I'm freakin' fourteen-ish years old! I don't need your faux parenting!†“Your size says otherwise...!~†Larxene replied in a sing-song voice. “At LEAST I'm not an old witch that castrates kittens in her spare time!†Larxene clicked her teeth together with annoyance. “HEY! Watch your tone, squirt!†“STOP YELLING AT ROXAS!†Axel yelled. “STOP YELLING AT ME FOR YELLING AT ROXAS!†“STOP YELLING AT AXEL FOR YELLING AT YOU FOR YELLING AT—†Oh lord – not again...! the readers thought. To their relief, Gentle tapping at the door interrupted all of the yelling. “Larxene...!~†a voice sang. “I'm both respecting your privacy by knocking, but asserting my authority as your superior by coming in anyway...!~†BOOM! Larxene sneered at Xaldin as he stomped through the door with his battering ram. He's cleanin' that up later... She put her hands on her hips, glaring at him as Marluxia and Zexion looked on from outside. “What do you want?!†“Oh, nothin'...†Xaldin drawled. “Just an explanation. Care to tell what THIS is?!†Axel and Roxas gasped in horror as he held up a pie scooper dripping with something that looked a whole lot like blueberry filling.... “I found THIS in the kitchen just now! These pies are only to be consumed on CHRISTMAS DAY.†Larxene shrugged. “So?†“SO?!†Xaldin quickly took a deep breath. “So... do you have any last words?†“Yeah!†Larxene snapped. “I want pie damnit!†Axel and Roxas quickly tip-toed away. Xaldin glared icily at her, growling a bit. “LARX—!!!†“In fact, I'm thinking maybe I should go for another break in! What do ya say, Xaldy?†Cackling, she portalled off before he could say anything. Xaldin stood there, sputtering in rage. “H-HEY!!!†He portalled off, too. Axel, with the thoughts of heroically saving Larxene, portalled off, also. Roxas, with thoughts of saving Axel's ass from impending dewm, off behind him. Marluxia just glanced over Zexion. “You gonna miss this?†“Like hell I will.†********************************* “Damned security system... How da **** does this thing work, anyway?†Larxene was standing at the fridge, a disgruntled look on her face as she studied it. She'd already tried pulling it open, trying to jam it open with her kunai – nothing seemed to work! The fridge was vacuum-sealed shut until the power turned back on – a security system Xaldin had forced Vexen to install to protect the precious food. “Hold it right there!†Larxene spun around to see Xaldin gripping one of his lances until his knuckles had turned white. He glared at her acidicly, and growled through clenched teeth, “Step... away... from the fridge...†“Make me.†SHING!!! “I said step away, you bloody wanker!†Larxene blinked as her two slender antennas of blonde hair floated down. She growled, eye twitching slightly as she glared at Xaldin with the same, if not more, amount of intensity. Now it was personal. “You little *****!!! Take that!†Thunder crackled in the huge “Ha! You missed!†“Dodge this!†“You hit like a *****!†“OW! You ****tard – you can't hit me! I'm a GIRL!†“Sometimes I wonder!†Larxene gave a beastly roar and lunged for him again. Marluxia, Zexion, Axel, and Roxas all crowded around the kitchen, careful not to get in the ring of fire. Axel gasped. “Holy **** – this is epic!†“FIVE-HUNDRED MUNNY ON XALDIN!!!†“You're on! 10,000 munny on Larxene!†“Get 'em, gurl!†“Watch out for that thunderbolt!†“Take him down! GO LARXENE!!!†The rest of the Organization were attracted like flies by the noise and sense of excitement. Within mere seconds, just about everyone was gathered around the brawl, cheering and screaming and casting bets. “Twenty-K on Larxene!†“Forty on Xaldin!†“Eight HUNDRED on Larxene!†“THIRTY ****ING MILLION ON XALDIN!!!†“Damn, Xiggy – I didn't know you had it in ya!†“STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!!!!!†The fight instantly halted to a stop as everyone turned to see just who'd been the one screaming. It was none other than... Demyx. The boy was standing there huffing out great puffs of breath. His fists and jaw were clenched tightly, and his eyes were red and puffy as if he'd burst into tears at any moment. Axel blinked and stepped forward. “Demyx, are you—†“Shut up,†Demyx growled, casting the redhead a glare that spoke much louder than words. Axel immediately fell silent. Xigbar sighed and started with a, “Demyx, I—†“Shut UP!†Demyx screamed, shoving his way into the crowd. They all stepped away as he shoved his way to the battle field. It looked as if a tornado had come and vomited in the middle of the kitchen floor. Pots and pans were scattered all over the place, along with discarded kunais. Black soot covered most of the floor, walls and cabinets, and static electricity was so strong in the air that just about everyone's hair was standing on end. Xaldin and Larxene stared at the boy as he slowly made his way up to them, and examined them both coldly. Then, he turned back to the crowd. “So...†he hissed softly. “This is your idea of a Merry Christmas...? THIS is what you'd rather spend your time doing?! Arguing and fighting with each other like a couple of two-year-olds?!†Saïx crossed his arms, glaring back at the boy. “That's how it's always been.†“Yeah,†Xaldin added, scoffing. “Why should we change now? Because of you? You're just a kid who wants to live in a fantasy land. You have NO CLUE what they rest of us have been through, alright?†“You just don't get it, do you...?!†Demyx growled forcefully. His fists were practically shaking with rage by now. “Christmas... isn't aing about the past... It's about hoping for a better future! It's about peace, and love, and joy for all! DON'T YOU GET IT?!†Saïx rolled his eyes “You were a fool for ever believing that nonsense.†Demyx turned his furious gaze to the older man, his nails practically digging into his palms. And then, he gave a humorless chuckle. “Heh... Yeah. I guess I was.†Tears were streaming down his cheeks by now. Sniffling, he tried his best to wipe them away, reprimanding himself inwardly about how much of a baby he was being. Everyone watched him silently, no one quite knowing quite what to say. Not even Saïx said anything. They allowed him a few seconds to get himself back together. When he finally did, he continued in a shaky voice, “But.. fine. If you don't want all of that – not even for ONE stinkin' day – I won't try to force you anymore.†He snatched Axel's fake beard and tossed it angrily to the ground. “So you can TAKE OFF your stupid little outfits—†and furiously kicked a pot that had been unlucky enough to be lying on the floor, “—and EAT your god-damned pie – what-EVER! I don't CARE anymore! If you need me, don't even bother asking! I'll be in my room, jerks.†Still sniffling, he pushed past the crowd again, and stomped off. Everyone watched him until he had completely disappeared into the darkness, not uttering a squeak. SLAM! They all looked at each other silently, and looked away guiltily. “...... So, uh... Who won, exactly? I had 50K riding on that fight.†Every pair of eyes in the room glared at Saïx. “... What?†To be continued… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Okay, when DEMYX curses, you know he's pissed. =\ Lolz - Grinch!Saïx makes me happeh... and pisses me off at the same time. Weird, huh? Ummmmmmmmm............ I'm tired. So, later, when I'm not half-dead from typing up 5 pages straight and uploading this whole thing on KHV, maybe I'll have something intellegent to say. 8D Lolz - kthnx bai. Lord of the Wings, ~Leah.
Thank you! ^^ I'm updating another story as we speak! ;P Just guess which one!
Awww... Why don't you come see me at DA instead? =C You'd get more bonus stuff like dubs that I've done and awesome RP moments and such... It'd be awesome... ;w;
Thanks, pal. XD Yeah - the point was to make people THINK that, but if you've visited my stuff before, you'd know that I'd NEVER do anything THAT obvious. X'DDD Finding out new and creative ways to mislead my readers is kinda what I DO.
Thanks a lot. X'DDD It took a long time to get where I am. ^^ After I read it again to myself, I could bearly believe I'd done it all in 2 or 3 days. Come again!
Lexaeus is SO worth it any day. XD
I'm okay. XD Just okay.
Thanks. X'DDD I have plenty more where that came from, if you're interested! Come again!
If they did that, he'd wreck the place and poral out... Besides - he wouldn't really WASH - she'd just get wet and come out with that even WORSE wet-dog smell. X'DDD So, they found that the most effective way to clean him is to grab some soap, get a wad of steel-wool and go to work. X'DDD No matter HOW much hell he raised. And now I'm using Open Office. It's not NEARLY as good as Word, but it's good enough, I suppose... ;w; Thank you, friend. ;w; You make an old, wash-up feel very good about herself. <333
Hey, girl, hey! =D
YAY. I'M WANTED! ;w;
Not that many of you guys care, but I'm planning to get my Christmas Special up again ASAP. I couldn't get it done by Christmas this year because of major family problems, and needed something to cheer me up before I tried to work on it again. What was the solution? One-shot Crack stories, of course! X'DDD BTW, some of the formatting might be a little different than usual because I'm usuing a different computer AND a different program than I usually do for my stories. Sorry. XD Enjoy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "THAT" Time of Month Again... Larxene stormed though the halls of the castle, fists clenched so hard she could feel her nails digging into her palms. Her eyes were ablaze as she glanced into rooms and down corridors, anxiously searching for that one person she need to talk to SO badly, she could just... There goes the little prick! Zexion was sitting inside of his room, reading something that happened to NOT be a dirty magazine for once. She clicked her teeth together with annoyance, and clomped into his dark, depressing room without even knocking. “Zexion...†she hissed. “I—†The young man snapped shut his gigantic book shut with a sigh. “No, wait... Let me guess...†He took a deep breath, and winced. “That time of month again?†“Sure as hell is! So what the heck are you guys gonna do about it?!†she snapped. Zexion sighed and rose to his feet. “I'll get the Superior...†“Ah-ah-ah!~†Zexion winced slightly as Larxene clapped her hand roughly on his shoulder and squeezed so hard that he could feel her sharp fingernails digging into his pale skin. He hissed slightly. Larxene shot him a small, dangerous grin. “We'll go tell the Superior.†********************************* Xemnas sighed deeply. “I see... that time of month again...?†Zexion nodded. “Which raises the question, exactly WHOSE turn is it this time to take care of it THIS time?†Larxene scoffed. “Well, I can sure tell ya right now – I ain't doin' it! I had to do it the last three times! It's ZEXION'S turn!†Xemnas pretended he was surprised. “Oh...? Is that right...? I must have gotten off track...†He gulped slightly. “Well, then... I guess we have no choice but to...†“Eh-heh-heeeeeem...†Zexion cleared his throat loudly, and inched a turned-over picture over to Xemnas. Xemnas blinked, flipped the corner up so that he could peek at the picture, and then slammed his head on the desk with a sigh. Oh, you've GOT to be... “WELL, Xemnas?!†Larxene snapped. “Get on with it!†Xemnas sighed, propping his head up with one arm, looking away from Zexion's razor-sharp eyes. “Well, the I guess we have no choice but to let Number IX take care of it...†he muttered. Larxene snorted. “As long as it ain't me again,†she muttered, not really caring that Zexion had once again side-stepped his fair share of manual labor. She portalled off. Zexion grinned a bit, slipping the photo back into his robe. “I'll get him. It should be an... interesting sight to watch. Very amusing.†Xemnas grunted, pretending he was busy with something important. “Do what you will,†he muttered, feeling embarrassed that he'd been made a fool of by his young subordinate once more. Zexion smirked, nodding and walked off with his head held high. It felt good to be in control. ********************************* Demyx spun around gleefully in his room, hopping around like a ballerina on steroids and singing to his impressive collection of stuffed animals all over the room. He plucked one of of a nearby shelf, and spun around with it, giggling. “Rainbow monkeys!~ Rainbow monkeys!~ Oh so very rooooooound and su-per chun-keeeey...!~†He squeezed it, grinning. “Spreadin' LOVE wherever they go!~ Everybody's made of a big rain-BOOOOOW...!~†He danced around the room, picking up various colors as he sang. “OOOOOOOOOH, red and orange!~ And pink and blue!~ Rainbow Monkeys, Rainbow Monkeys, Dem loves YOOOOOU!~†Suddenly, someone kicked the door in. Demyx dropped all of his stuffed animals and shielded himself with his hands, letting loose a shrill, girly shriek. He peeked through his arms and grinned, straightening up. “Oh! Hey, Zexion! What's cookin', good lookin'?†Zexion stared at him for a second, his expression blank. “Call me that again, and I'll cut you.†His voice gave no indication of jest. Demyx gulped, staring back into Zexion's blank, frightening eyes. “Uh... w-well, anyways, what brings you here?†“It's THAT time of month again.†The color drained out of Demyx's face. “O...Oh no... D...don't t-tell me that I...!†Zexion nodded. Demyx screamed, clutching his head and falling to the ground. “NO!!! Why ME?! WHY?!?!†“Get yourself together, IX!†Zexion snapped. “You are THE best suited member for this task and you are GOIN' to do it whether you like it or not! It's YOUR turn!†Demyx sniffed, looking up at Zexion. “Hey... H-how come I never see YOU doing this job, anyway...?†Zexion stared at the boy with the same amount of potency as he did before. “Are you going to get marching or will I have to MAKE you?†he asked at last. Demyx sighed, and dragged himself out of the room. Zexion waited until he was he was completely out of sight before giving a relieved sigh. At first, I thought the idiot was onto me. ********************************* Faint knocking on the door. “C'min.†Demyx peeked into the room, giving the redhead a shy smile. “Uh... Hey, Axel – it's me... Demyx... Again. Heh...†“Oh...†Axel grinned a bit. “Dem – it's just you! Hey, man! Grab a seat!†“Thanks...†Demyx smiled nervously, nodded a quick thanks, and sat on the bed, squirming uncomfortably. “... Somethin' on your mind?†Demyx let loose a peal of nervous laughter, twitching slightly. “Who – me?! Havin' somethin' on my mind?! Never – never – never – NEVER! AH HAHAHAHAHA! Haha... Yeah.†The boy went back to staring at his hands as if they were the most interesting things in all of the worlds. “Um... except this one thing.... Axel, do you know what day it is...?†he asked softly. “Uh... Tuesday?†Demyx shook his head. “Not just any Tuesday, Axel... It's the Tuesday following after the waxing crescent moon in Halloween Town right before the Oogie Boogie does the Hokey Pokey and turns himself around!†“That's what it's all about?!†Axel cried. Demyx clapped twice sadly. “No way!†Axel cried. “Th-that day is TODAY?!†Demyx nodded. “Yep... I'm sorry to telly you this, Axel, but... It's THAT time of month again...†Axel gulped. “Y...You mean...†“That's right...†Demyx sighed. “It's... bath night.†Axel felt his blood run cold. “B...But it c-can't be...†he murmured past numb lips. “I....It can't!†Demyx shrugged and nodded. “Apparently, it can. Axel, you stink!†“No, I DON'T! I took a bath just yesterday!†Demyx sighed. “Washing with gasoline, alcohol, or oil doesn't really count, Axel.†“B-But what about—†“Neither does lighting yourself on fire on the roof. Really, Axel – it's gotten so bad that Zexion's been getting nosebleeds every time he walks past your room! We can smell you all the way to Hollow bastion. On a clear night, we might even get the Olympus Colosseum!†“............†Demyx stood up with a sigh.â€Now, c'mon, Axel. We can do this the easy way or the hard way! Or... the medium way. Or the semi-medium-easy hard-way. OR the sorta-hard-with-a-touch-of-awkward-easy-difficult-challenging way.†Silence. Axel only looked up at Demyx like a cornered, scared rabbit might look at a hungry wolf. Demyx narrowed his eyes. “So that's the way ya wanna play it, huh...?†He grabbed Axel's hand and tried to pull him out of his his seat. “You're gonna... HAVE to... get into... that TUB, Axel! Now—†“DON'T TOUCH ME!†Demyx screamed as Axel singed his hand and jerked it back. He gasped, rubbing his hand as the redhead jumped to his feet, his face twisted in an expression of pure rage and fear. “Y-You're just like THEM! Get AWAY from me, you PSYCHO!!!†he screamed, dashing into a corridor of darkness. Demyx groaned, following him through the portal. “Here we go...†he sighed. ********************************* “Axel! Axel, where are you?! Come back!†Demyx cried, running through the dirty streets of Agrahbah with his sitar in hand. “Axel, c'mon! The sooner we do this, the sooner it'll be over with!†Axel peeked around a corner at him. “I SAW THAT!†He cursed, and ducked back around, narrowly dodging a well-aimed ball of water and scampered off. “AXEL! Get back here!†Demyx cried, dashing after him. “DON'T MAKE ME USE THIS THING! By golly, I WILL USE IT IF YOU DON'T STOP RIGHT NOW!!!†“YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!†Wow – Demyx never knew how FAST Axel could run! The redhead sped through the dusty streets like the Roadrunner on those old cartoons he watched with Lexaeus every Saturday morning. Demyx, quite literally, was left in the dust, hacking and coughing the fine film of dirt trapped in his lungs and waving his hand around to clear the air. The dust was actually so thick, the ball of water in his hand turned into a ball of jiggly mud. He dropped it to the ground, seeing that it was now useless. He was trying to CLEAN Axel – not make him even dirtier! When he could finally see again, all that was left was a portal faaaaaar on the other end of the street. ... Oh... Snap... The boy broke into a frantic sprint toward the corridor of darkness, as if the devil himself were after him. A thin bead of sweat trickled down his face. Please don't close before I get there, please don't close before I get there, PLEASE don't close before I get there...! The portal was either not a very good listener, or not able to read minds. It began to close anyway. Oh, CRAP! With a shrill whoop, the boy dove into the portal before it could close and pace-planted into a thick stalk of bamboo. With a groan, he sat up, rubbing his head, blinked, and whined. Land of the Dragons?! Is he planning to take me on a road-trip or something? Just then, he saw a flash of red in the bamboo forest. Quick as a whip, he spun around, and sent a surge of water in that direction. Axel screamed like a little girl and began scaling the nearest stalk like a monkey. Unfortunately, he wasn't a very GOOD monkey; the bamboo snapped halfway up, and he tumbled to the ground with a WHUMPF! “DANCE, WATER, DANCE!!!†“AUGHHH-WHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!†Axel rolled out of the way, and then under went a rather complex series of jumps, back-flips, cartwheels, and whatever else he needed to do to dodge and water-missiles from Demyx. When he felt he couldn't keep it up any longer, he fired his own blast of fire at the boy. Demyx shrieked and ducked. When he dared to look up again, Axel was already sprinting down to the camp. Demyx gave a haggard sigh, and dragged himself to his feet. Here we go again... ********************************* Demyx felt as if he had followed Axel to the the ends of the Earth and back. They'd started the chase at ten in the morning, but now it was at LEAST six in the evening, and the redhead STILL was showing no sign of slowing down! Defeated and disappointed, Demyx headed back home to rest. To his surprise, he found someone else in his room! “... Huh? Lexxy? What're you doing here, silly pants?†the sweaty boy laughed, stumbling forward for a hug. Lexaeus laughed , hugging back. “Hello, Demyx... Today's movie night – Xigbar sent me to find you...†The man sniffed. “... Demyx, I don't mean to be rude, but you smell awful...†Demyx sighed. “It's that time of month again...†he grumbled. “Ahhh...†“Yeah – I know! And I can't CATCH him! He's, like, as fast as.. as... PSHOOM! I just, like, BLINK, and all of a sudden, he's, like, GONE! And I'm like 'WHOA!' and he's like, 'YOU SHALL NOT EVER CATCH ME ALIVE NOOB – LOLOLOLOL!' and I'm all like, 'AWWWWWW!' and I—I-It's like...†He flailed his arms around aimlessly. “NYAAAAUGGGGGHHHH!!! Ya know?!†Lex smiled gently, just barely holding back his laughter. “Yes, Demyx, I know exactly what you mean... I've been down that same road many times before.†He sat on the bed, patting the space next to him. Demyx obediently followed, pouting. Lex chuckled slightly and gently gave the boy a small hug. “Let me give you a hint as to a technique I happened upon last time that might work this time as well...†He motioned the boy closer with his index finger. Demyx blinked and leaned over, listening as Lexaeus whispered his plan into his ear. Suddenly, he gasped, eyes twinkling. “LEXXY!†he exclaimed, jumping to his feet. “You're a GENIUS! Thanks so much!!!†With a last, short hug, the boy scampered off into a portal. Lex chuckled again, shaking his head. ********************************* Axel jogged down the street of Twilight Town, panting lightly. Can't get wet, can't wet, can't get we—OOOOOH!!! He screeched to a stop suddenly, grinning as his eyes caught sight of an ice cream stand across the street. A young man with a large, shady hat and dark blue denim overalls was grinning and handing a double-scoop of strawberry and chocolate to a little girl and waving her off. Upon closer inspection, he could see that the stand also sold sea-salt ice cream. Axel's mouth began watering almost instantly. He jogged in place for a bit, looking around, to see if any water assassins were lurking, but luckily, the coast was clear. He grinned and jogged over. It can't hurt to have ONE little snack, right? I've been running from Demyx all day! Once he got to the front of the line, he ordered, “One sea-salt ice cream bar, please!†The man nodded silently, the shadow of his hat shading his face, and handed over Axel's request. Axel licked his lips hungrily, and reached for it, but just when his fingers were brushing the Popsicle stick... “HA! Gotcha!†Clink! Axel gasped as the man grabbed his writs and promptly handcuffed their hands together. “Let's try to see you run away NOW!†the stranger cried triumphantly. Axel gasped as the man tilted the hat up, revealing his face. “DEMYX?!†With a howl of rage, he yanked his hand back. “LET ME GO! NO, NO! I WON'T GO!!!†Demyx held onto his wrist with two hands, baring his teeth. “Yes... You... WILL! Now come on!†He tugged the yowling redhead away through a portal to his bathroom. The bath was already full and ready. The sight of the water made the redhead turn white as a sheet. The screams got more frequent and high-pitched as Demyx grabbed a mesh of steel wool and began yanking off Axel's boots and socks. “No! NO! Demyx, DON'T! I-I thought we were FRIENDS!!!†“We ARE friends, Axel, but you have to take a bath every month! You signed a CONTRACT! And it's my job to make sure you go through with it!†came Demyx's muffled reply as he began tearing off Axel's shirt with his teeth. “JOB?! A-Are they paying you?! I can pay you! BIG munny! Please, Demyx – just let me go!†he sobbed. “I can't go OUT like this!†“Axel, just shut up and get in the tub! Don't make me force you!†“NEVER!!!†There was slight grunting, signaling a start of yet another battle, and then a definite hissing sound as Demyx forced Axel into the water – followed by a high-pitched shriek and frantic splashing. “YOU'RE NAZIS, MAN! YOU'RE ****IN' NAZIS!!!†“Axel, be still – you're gonna make me fa—AUUGHHH!! NOW you've done it! Look at me – I've gotten my god overalls all WET!†More sobbing. “I'm melting! I'm melting...! Why won't anybody SAVE me from this psychopath?!†From outside the door, a cloaked figure was listening with his hand over his mouth, giggling slightly. “Well...†Zexion chuckled after he'd composed himself once more. “Maybe some good has come out of this AFTER all... Demyx DID break the record – I mean, wow! It only took him ten hours!†~The End~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Ah, Zexion, you loveable *******. X'DDD We love you muchly. <3 Yes, people. More "LOVE LEXAEUS, DEMMIT! :yelling:" propaganda. Originally, that spot was going to be filled with Xigbar, but I've given the dude enough screentime before. XD Lexaeus is in DESPERATE need of fans! Don't make a grown man cry! Convert into Lexxy-ism today! 8DDD (Only for ten easy payments of 49.99! X'DDD) *brick't* Ummm.... Yeah. I feel like the funniest part of this whole fic was the beginning... BEFORE I started getting tired and started half-arsing so that I could hurry up with this and get back with the Christmas Special. ^^; It was starting to get a bit long for a one-shot, so I decided to cut out a lot of ideas in the middle. ... BABBLING!Demyx = LUB. X'DDD “Yeah – I know! And I can't CATCH him! He's, like, as fast as.. as... PSHOOM! I just, like, BLINK, and all of a sudden, he's, like, GONE! And I'm like 'WHOA!' and he's like, 'YOU SHALL NOT EVER CATCH ME ALIVE NOOB – LOLOLOLOL!' and I'm all like, 'AWWWWWW!' and I—I-It's like...†He flailed his arms around aimlessly. “NYAAAAUGGGGGHHHH!!! Ya know?!†Probably one of the funniest quotes I've ever given that little guy. X'DDD Plus, who else can TOTALLY see him singing the Rainbow Monkey song - no matter HOW disturbing it may be? Be honest. X'DDD And yes. I'm well aware of how wrong the last part sounds. Get over it. X'DDD As funny as it is, there is absolutely NO way you can portray one grown man giving another grown man a bath as RIGHT. I know. >.>;;; I've tried. P.S., Have you ever found yourself hot and exhausted on a steaming summer day? Are you too lazy to go out and buy a treat for yourself when the icecream truck comes to town? Or are you just curious as to what semen tastes like? Then come on over to Twilight Town and get your own Sea-Salt icecream cart TODAY! =DDD It comes pre-stocked with sea-salt icecream along with 10 other delicious flavors! A 100-munny value, absolutely FREE! All you have to do to get your Pre-stocked sea-salt icecream cart is run down to your nearest Funny Bunny Inc. store or call 1-234-567-890 and make ten easy payments of 599.99! (Plus shipping and handling.) So call now! 8DDD
Go Asians! X'DDD
Thanks again, guys. ^^ You're all awesome.
I have a liking of older guys, too... X'DDD *kicks Xigbar for warping my views on younger guys* Anyways, thanks for liking! I think that he's really attractive like this, too... X'DDD *has a thing for sensitive guys*
I think everyone should love Lexxy. XD Problem is, he doesn't get enough screen time. I feel if more people saw more of him, he'd grow on them more and become more popular. Thus, I've stared giving him bigger roles in my fanfics. It's only FAIR. DDD8> Axel keeps hoggin' the freakin' spotlight! X'DDD Thanks a lot for liking! *smooches* ;D Were you expecting it to be funny or something, so you were already laughing by the time you started even though there was nothing really funny goin' on? XD That's happened to me before, so I'd understand. XD
"Gentle Giant" Lexaeus swiped his brow, giving a small, satisfied sigh. Almost done… he thought with a smile. Finally. After all this time, my hard work is paying off… The door swung open revealing a boy with dirty-blonde hair and sea-foam green eyes. “L…Lexy…?” “Ah… Demyx. Come on in – take a seat.” The boy smiled a bit, and scuttled in, making sure to close the door behind him. The large, brawny man regarded him with cool, astute eyes. “What brings you here, little one…?” he asked softly. “It’s not like you to stay up so late…” “Oh… hehheh… I, um… I just had a bad dream… is all.” “Is that so?” Lex replied with a small smile. “Well then, you can tell me about it as I finish up my latest project.” “Okay…” Demyx began talking slowly, stammering and stumbling over his words as he told a completely bizarre story about lions and witches and wardrobes – probably something made up on the spot. Lexaeus only an understanding smile and listened intently as he continued sculpting the tiny clay statue of the beautiful angel that he was working on. After a while, Demyx simply ran out of ideas, and ended with a lame, “And that’s what happened.” Lexaeus didn’t respond – he only kept working in that slow, purposeful fashion. The boy watched him silently, taking in the strange scene. Lex had always been a mystery to him; anyone who’d see him walking down the street probably would immediately judge him by his size and get the impression that he was cruel, spontaneous, and even stupid. Man, were looks deceiving! Despite Lex’s size, his movements were carefully calculated – graceful even. Even now, his hands – massive ones that could single-handedly engulf a whole basket ball each, were gracefully skimming over the surface of the magnificent sculpture with such tenderness, you had to wonder if the blade was really touching at all. As the boy gazed at his face – scrunched up in such deep concentration, he realized that Lex was probably the wisest, kindest, and most mild-mannered person he knew. After a long time – half an hour at the very least, the large man finally asked, “So why did you REALLY come to me, Demyx? Tell the truth.” Demyx stammered for a bit, anxiously trying to form a makeshift excuse, and then sighed. “Okay, Lexy – you win… The reason I really came was because the… the new guy… What’s his name?” “Hmmm… Marluxia? The one Xigbar recruited?” “Yeah – that’s it. He tried to eat me just now! Again!” the boy whimpered. “I got scared, so I came to you…” Lex gave a tired sigh as he stepped into the chamber of his room that held the huge, super-heated furnace Xemnas allowed to him to install. Something tells me that one will be quite a problem in the future…. What Xigbar had going through his head when he initiated the man, I’ll never know… he thought grimly. Once the tiny statue was safely cooking inside the gigantic oven, Lex reappeared, wiping his hands on the dark blue apron again. He turned to the younger boy. “Tell you what I’ll do. Tomorrow, I don’t have any scheduled missions. I’ll be sure to inform Vexen about your trials. But tonight, why don’t we bake some cookies, and I’ll read to you from that story book you like so much…?” Demyx jumped to his feet, completely ecstatic with joy. “REALLY?! Lexy, ya mean it?!?!” “But of course,” Lexaeus replied with a friendly smile. “I’d LOVE it!” “Very well, then. Just let me wash up a bit and I’ll be glad to.” Demyx grinned and sat down on the bed as Lex disappeared into his bathroom for a well-deserved shower. ******************************************* “Ah… Comfy?” “Yup!” Lexaeus patted the boy’s head fondly. “Good.” The two were now nestled in front of a huge, roaring fire in Zexion’s private library. The plate of cookies, piping hot and fresh from the oven, were cooling on a small table next to them with two identical glasses of ice-cold milk right beside the cookies. Lex was seated in an extremely large, plush sofa with Demyx curled up comfortably in his lap, gnawing hungrily on his first vict—I mean... Cookie. “Okay – let’s see here…” Lex’s azure eyes scanned over the title of the short story he’d be reading that night. “‘The Blind Little Lillybelle’… Once upon a time, there was a blind flower by the name of Lillybelle… She was very beautiful, but…” Demyx had always found Lexaeus’s powerful voice absolutely magical – especially during story-time. He never seemed to spoke in a loud voice, more like a calm, soothing one that seemed to rise and fall gently with every sentence. It carried him on a cloud in his own mind, took him on a magical, unexplainable journey and then carefully lowered him into the safe, warm confines of sleep. Indeed, as the cookies and milk rations ran low, it wasn’t long before the boy was sound asleep in Lex’s arms, still clutching one last cookie in his hands. Lex smiled gently and ruffled his hair fondly as the fire crackled and popped warmly before them. He’d never really understood the boy’s history and why he’d been chosen to join the Organization as young and… unsuitable for warfare as he was. But perhaps there was a hidden power sleeping somewhere deep inside him. Xemnas had always been exceptional at seeing potential… Shaking his head with a little sigh, the man softly closed his book and rested his head against the back of the huge, plush chair. Left alone with only his thoughts to accompany him, Lexaeus found that after some time that he, too, had fallen asleep. ******************************************* Clink… With a start, Demyx woke up. He blinked, sat up, yawned, stretched out a bit, cracked his back, and scratched his head wearily… before realizing he had no idea where he was. At first, there was a tiny stab of panic, but with another quick glance-around, he realized he was still in the library. The roaring fire from the night before was now reduced to just a pile of smoldering ashes, but there was now a warm, fuzzy blanket around his shoulders that hadn’t been there when he’d gone to sleep. Lex was gone, but there was a steaming tray of blueberry oatmeal – his favorite – as well as toast and orange juice on the table where the cookies had been. There was also a note. With a puzzled look on his face, the boy opened it up. It read: “Sorry, Demyx. Something came up. I couldn’t stay until you woke up. Xemnas’s orders. I hope breakfast will make up for my absence. Enjoy the rest of your day, ~Lexaeus. P.S., I talked to Vexen before I left. He’s going to perform an extensive psychoanalysis on the new member and maybe give him something that will tame him. You have nothing to worry about.” Demyx smiled a bit, sipping some of his orange juice and pulling the cozy blanket around him a little more. “Aw… That Lexy! Always lookin’ out for me…” He munched thoughtfully on his toast. “Still… I kinda wish I coulda at least have said goodbye…” After he was done eating, he got up and stretched. “Ahhhhh… Oh well, maybe next time… I wonder if Axel wants to play today…” he wondered aloud. Before he walked out of the library, he paused, ran back to carefully slip the note into his pocket, and scampered back off. ~End~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I got tired of writing huge, complex fanfictions that hurt my brain. X.x;;; I have NO brain-power left in my mind for huge plot-bunnies full of twists and turns and ANGST and over-the-top COMEDY... So...!~ I decided to write something simple. And cute. So sickeningly cute, it'd make you want to gouge your eyes out. For me, there's not really any thing else that hits the "adorable" strings in my heart more than gushy father\son drabbles. Srsly. Besides - I eeded an excuse to get Lexaeus more publicity. He NEEDS publicity, demmit! >8C LOVE HIM! LOVE HIM NAAAAOOO! *eats your soul* Ahem - sorry about that. Haven't taken my happy pills today. X'DDD Anyways, I truly think tat Lex would be the only member in the Organization that would be suitable for parenthood. Everyone else is too selfish\violent\uncaring\immature, etc... I also think that he WAS father in his past life to... (Dun-dun-duuuun...!~) Hayner. >.>;;; *smiteded* YOU ALL KNOW IT'S TRUE! don't make me sick Larxene on you! DDD< Moving on now. Demyx, in my mind, always happens to be the "baby" of the Organization (even if he's not technically the youngest) which, in many ways, does him more harm than good. Good thing there are people like Lexaeus out there that'd be willing to stick up for him. Who wants to argue with 300 pounds of solid muscle? And the thing about Marluxia... Inside joke, rly. x'DDD In case you folks haven't been keepin' up with me on dA, one of my newer assertions is that Marluxia is, indeed, an insane, cannibalistic nut-job (lolz - get it? nut? XD) who is obsessed with eating Demyx because... well... Plants "eat" water. It got so bad, that Vexen had to be forced to make him a medicine to subdue him which gives you the ghey, over-the-top Marly in 90% of my fanfictions. Aaaand when it starts to wear off, you get the evil, scheming ******* in CoM. ... So... yeah. he will throw a freakin' fit if you try to make him eat one of his plants, but eating one of his comrades is perfectly acceptable. I honestly dunno, guys. Mayb one of you should just put me out of my misery. X'DDD wow - this got a lot longer than I would've liked. >3>;;; Oh well - it was nice talkin' to ya'll again. XD Have a nice day and such! <3 Lord of the Wings, ~Leah.
DA = deviantArt. A place where creators, artists, and authors alike can get together and blog and share their works and... stuff like that. XD Go there sometime - it's fantasticle. XD I knoooow... *flails* It's just hard not to think of myself as old news sometimes.. Maybe I'm just a vain, ignorant bish. Whatever. For some reason, I just feel like I belong anymore, though. What happened to you on MSN, BTW? If... you already have MSN... X.x;;; *forgets shiz like crazy*
We already gave you our reasons, miss. :D I only liked the second game for the raphics and ORganization XIII, really... That's about it. =\
