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You used the word "south" in a way that I don't understand.

So what you're saying is that you're finding it hard to P?

Dropped.

You used the word "north" in a way that I don't understand.

You can't go that way.

It slips through your fumbling fingers and hits the carpet with a nerve-shattering bang.

It looks like your gown contains:
a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is
a buffered analgesic
pocket fluff

You see nothing special about the buffered analgesic.
[It's basically aspirin.]

You used the word "n" in a way that I don't understand.

Opening your gown reveals a thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is, a buffered analgesic, and pocket fluff.

Ok

As you part your curtains you see that it's a bright morning, the sun is shining, the birds are singing, the meadows are blooming, and a large yellow bulldozer is advancing on your home.

I don't know the word "stick".

That sentence isn't one I recognise.

[That's the only pocket around. You don't need to specify.]

I don't know the word "check".

[Try something like "look" modified by a preposition for stuff like this. "At," "in," "under," "around," and stuff like that will all work.

You are now wearing your gown.

Luckily, this is large enough for you to get hold of. You notice something in the pocket.

[WE HAVE PROGRESS.]

Did you have any particular direction in mind?

[N, NE, E, SE, S, SW, W, NW are all valid options when asked to provide a direction.]

You're not holding your gown.

It looks like every other toothbrush you've ever seen.

I don't know the word screw.

Saved to KHV_Main.

I don't know the word "store".

Saved to KHV_Main.

I don't know the word "store".

[You don't have to tell it to store things in your inventory. It'll do that automatically once you manage to pick something up. But that won't happen right now because you're naked and hung over.]

Playing video games and posting videos of it doesn't count as a job anyway. Companies should just have interns make official playthroughs and then ban people from getting money for their own Let's Plays. The companies get to keep their content and Let's Players learn a valuable lesson about life. Everyone wins.

Where are you guys getting all these leopards and how are you using them as computer input devices?

[BACK UP AND RUNNING. SORRY FOR THE DELAY]

You have:

a splitting headache
no tea​

Bedroom
The bedroom is a mess.
It is a small bedroom with faded carpet and old wallpaper. There is a washbasin, a chair with a tatty dressing gown slung over it, and a window with the curtains drawn.
Near the exit leading south is a phone.
There is a flathead screwdriver here.
There is a toothbrush here.

[PSST! You can save your game at any time. Just say SAVE and the name of the file. By default I will have it saved as KHV_Main, and not giving a name will save your game to that file automatically.]

Thanks, Misty.

HEY WAIT A MINUTE!

[Kay, so it turns out that's not in the version I'm using, but it's kinda necessary so I'm going to update to the next available version and then redo all the commands. It's a good thing I caught this soon. I'll edit this post with the result of the last command ASAP.]

Really? I thought it was meant to be a response to the "not all men" argument against all the misandrists who call themselves feminists as if to say, "Maybe not all men [are rapists/objectify women/etc.] but #YesAllWomen feel like they could be raped or otherwise victimized by men."